Call of Cthulhu: Shadow of the Crystal Palace


Good evening, children, and welcome to Call of Cthulhu, Shadow of the Crystal Palace. We’ll be getting into that vibe in a little bit. In the meantime, I’m Taliesin Jaffe. I’m your Keeper for the evening. This is possibly your first time watching this game or playing it, and it’s almost mine, too. It’s certainly my first time running it, so, be gentle.
(laughing) I’m really excited to run this game, it’s gonna be an awful lot of fun. This one-shot has been developed with our friends at Chaosium, the people who make Call of Cthulhu. It’s a fun game, it’s a very different vibe from your normal Dungeons & Dragons, and I’m looking forward to showing you what you can do with it. For those of you who don’t know, Call of Cthulhu is the classic horror roleplaying game where players take on the role of journalists, academics, detectives, any of the kind of, pulp adventuring archetypes, to investigate terrors of all sorts. We’ll have a special one tonight. Our story tonight has a soft connection, do I have it somewhere here? I believe I put it here. All the way over here. To their new Call of Cthulhu Starter Set, which is the perfect gateway product for anyone interested in Cthulhu, but not sure where to start. When they threw this at us, they were asking if we wanted to run it, and then we were of the opinion that we didn’t wanna spoil it for you, so this game is a subtle prequel that you can either incorporate into your version of the game, or ignore and do something else interesting. Either way, depends on how things go. I have no idea.
(laughing) The Starter Set gives you basic rules and some starter adventurers, and ready-to-play game characters, and some usable dice and prop handouts. We’ll be talking about prop handouts in a minute. And you can go pick up the Starter Set right now and use the code, CRITICALROLE when you check out to get 10% off your entire order. Go to critrole.com/cthulhu and I will spell that for the uninitiated, C-T-H-U-L-H-U right now to check it out, and don’t forget to use the code word when you check out. I have a lovely collection of investigators before me. I don’t know if you can see them yet, including everyone from our own, Marisha Ray, Erika Ishii, Phil Lamarr, Travis Willingham, Ashly Burch, and Sam Riegel, who are joining us–
(laughing) I’ll allow you just that once. I just got the one out. (laughing) It’s the other one. Oh shoot, I’ve been– Liam O’Brien will be joining us. Hello, darlings.
Hello. I’m so happy everyone dressed up. Part of the fun of this game, and I’m gonna lay out a little bit of what I like about this game before we start playing so that people know what to expect, is that it’s a little less heroic than what you’re used to in Dungeons & Dragons, it’s a little less of the killing of dragons and a little bit more of running for your bloody life. Poor Travis, I picked you especially for this. (laughing) It’s also a very prop-heavy game, and I’ve gotten to develop a whole bunch of really exciting and interesting props that none of these players are ever going to find– (laughing) Because they’re gonna just go completely off the rails. I love prop comedy.
This is– Yes. This is the absence of prop comedy, I don’t know what that is. Rule of threes. (laughing) Or the roll of threes.
(laughs) Oh. With disadvantage. Couple other things. What do I also wanna cover? So, there will be some interesting props, hopefully, that we’ll get to show off, and how that relates to the game and makes the game a lot of fun. I also wanna just put out for anybody who is interested in the genre, I’m a big fan of cosmic horror, I love cosmic horror. One of my favorite memories was walking home from the movie, “In the Mouth of Madness”, which if you’ve never seen, the idea of walking home in a mist without another living human being there– What the hell? Nearly gave me a heart attack. Oh my god.
Sam Niell, so good. And the high wire balancing act between the scale and fragility of the human experience set against a hostile world has always been my adrenaline candy. And before we begin, it’s worth noting that the man behind the name most associated with this genre was a problematic mess, even by the standards of his time. But, it is a big genre with lots of big things happening in it right now, and many voices doing really important work that is going to be heavy, and terrifying, and great, and I’m excited to show what you can do with these tools so that you can join the nightmare choir of the never-living, and maybe make the story a little less about him and a little bit about you and what scares you. Ooh. It’s gonna be fun. So, I suppose unless anybody else has anything they wanna say before we begin. Should I leave?
(laughing) Can I be excused? I’ve hidden your keys. Your wife knows to lock the door. She wished me a goodbye just as second ago in text, I didn’t know what it meant. Is this part of the game?
It was certainly someone who looked like her, it could’ve been anybody. Don’t do this, Taliesin, why are you doing this? I love you all. I’m getting it out of my system now ’cause we’re gonna start light. Are you? Are you getting it out of your system or are you just getting started? I’m getting a taste for it, it’s like tasting human flesh. Warm up, this is just a warm up. Right? Without further ado, my wonderful investigators, I will be your Keeper tonight and we will be having a Critical Role journey into Call of Cthulhu in a little story I have called, Shadow of the Crystal Palace. (laughs menacingly) (slow music) It’s a lovely October evening. It’s a beautiful night, and all of you have elected, for reasons that are going to become obvious, to attend the first meeting of the year of the National Cat Club at the Crystal Palace. The National Cat Club is very trendy, but it is open to an awful lot of different social standings, so it tends to be a bit of a mix. People are titled and fluent there, but plenty of you have enough social capital to go in, and all of you have cats entered in the Cat Show. The Cat Show opens to the public in 15 days, but in the meantime they were just going over some new business, old business, and otherwise. Johnathan Lanske, the… minute-keeper for the Cat Club is going over some of the news of the day. (clears throat) Mr. Harrison Weer has resigned his seat as judge for this year’s Cat Show, an institution founded by Mr. Weer himself more than 20 years ago. If we count rabbits, pigeons, poultry, and our other domesticated creatures, Mr. Harrison Weer has spent over 40 years as a fancier judge. In a letter to Poultry Magazine, he has explained that he has given up his Cat Show judgeship due to some differences between the manager and himself regarding classes and schedules of prizes. Mr. Weer considered that out of fairness to exhibitors who incur so much expense and risk in forwarding their pets to these shows, the number of classes should be increased. His judgeship on the Fruit Committee of the Royal Agriculture Society is the only position of this kind of which Mr. Weer means to retain. It is unnecessary in this company to say that cat lovers and cat exhibitors across the country regret Mr. Weer’s decision. With over 600 breeds to be displayed. (group chuckling) As this remarkable speech moves forward all of you feel a tap on the shoulder to a young man, well-dressed with bushy blond hair that many of you recognize as Mr. Rupert Maryweather, as he slowly pulls you into a side room to meet him, just off the corridor. I imagine no one really wants to stay to hear the end of this speech, I think it’s– I do, I’m gonna be here four hours. Okay, just–
(laughing) I have a recording you can put on. I’ll be right back. I have four pages of it.
(laughing) Have we already parted with our own personal cats at this point? Oh yes, they are already being housed at the exhibit. Oh, what a shame.
Mm-hmm. He motions for all of you to go meet him in this side room. Can I say for the record, that my cat is actually just rat that I attached cat ears to. A very large rat. You might’ve been able to get away with it to be magnificently frank, you would– What’s that one? It’s so exotic. Must be a new species, I’m not sure. Siamese just became very popular in recent years, so anything is game. Maybe it’s one of those hairless Egyptians, you know? Not sure. (laughing) I love every minute of this. You are taken aside into a small, just appears to be a sitting room, a adjunct office to this main room that they’re having the meeting in. We are all together? All together, all six of you. (chuckles) Well. And Mr. Maryweather. Well, I am just pleased as punch all of you who were willing to go through with this, what could be a slightly dangerous and definitely mildly criminal forwarding. None of you, I assume, know each other. I’m almost certain none of you have ever met. So, for the sake of introductions, let me begin. As most of you know, I am Mr. Maryweather, I’m funding this project. All of you have agreed to terms and stipulations of what’s coming forward, and many things have already been put in motion. Now, I am hoping to retrieve a small casket, which several of you have a reasonable description of, from the Crystal Palace outside us. Now, of course, normally, on a normal day, the Crystal Palace, which is a huge building, would be open to the public and bristling with people, but thanks to the evening and the fact that all of you had cats that we could enter into this show, we may be able to walk around unencumbered tonight. There’s minimal security as long as you don’t go into the upper floors, and stay only into the wing that is currently closed off due to the Cat Show. It shouldn’t be too hard to figure out where they’re unpacking and unboxing things. Somewhere amongst all of that, our friend, Dr. Pocket here, has moved the casket in question into the Crystal Palace. Sadly, we don’t know where in the exhibit it’s currently being stored, we were incapable of having that much control over the situation. So, Dr. Pocket has been in contact with the casket and knows its appearance already? Sadly, as far as I understand, Dr. Pocket simply did the paperwork. Oh, I misunderstood. I was not in possession of the casket, as neither has been Mr. Maryweather. No.
But you have details? Bills of lading, mostly.
Okay. Well, what’s in it? Well, that is a question, isn’t it? It is approximately two feet long about another third meter high, and you guys use meters, that’s right, I have to keep remembering. And it is apparently some possibly Egyptian derivative, we’re not really entirely sure, but it is classified as Egyptian, and is an Egyptian antiquity. I have obvious need of this, and you have all been paid, or at least compensated very well for your time here. You’ve all been hand-selected for your skills. The hope is you will have time to go into the Crystal Palace, find the casket, and return to this room where you will meet me, or at the very least, my butler, Captain Badger there, will ferret it away to me as quickly as possible. So, you will not be coming with us, Mr. Maryweather? I am trying to keep a bit of a low profile on this one, there are plenty of people who already know that I am interested in this particular antique, and if I’m publicly seen during this entire expedition, well, then the better that no one suspect that I have it. Mr. Maryweather has many interests elsewhere, I assure you, I will be here to assist you in any way that any of you might need. Okay. How much time do we have? Well, I would’ve said you only have two hours, but at the speed of which this meeting is going, I think four to five is a far more likely proposition. In need of additional time, is there anyone who could potentially stall? I don’t necessarily think it’ll be necessary with the oratory prowess of Mr. Lanske, but just in case, I have some contingencies if things go wrong, and I will be waiting for your signal. In the meantime, I recommend at the very least that you all take a second to familiarize yourself with each other, and I would imagine the first order of business will probably be trying to figure out how to get the lights on in the north hall, where we’re going to be. I’ve got that handled, no worries there. Why don’t you start? I’m Ida. Pleased to make all of your acquaintances, I’m an engineer, and that’s about all you need to know about me. Short, to the point, I like it. I know you.
Do you? Mr. Conan Doyle says such wonderful things. Well, I don’t like to toot my own horn, but if Mr. Conan Doyle will, I can’t forbid him. I’m here as a bit of a security measure, although, not in the way some of you might thing. The item in question is old, and wrapped in mystery, and I am here to make sure that we are safe from threats on the other side. Do you believe it is haunted then? Oh, god. Few things in this world are not somewhat haunted. This, I believe, is very. Mr. Septimus, I believe you do like to toot your own horn. Now, if you’ve got it, flaunt it. I assure you, all of you are the top in your field, and of course, Mr. Goodfellow, Mr. Septimus Goodfellow is the top in his, and I’ve spared no expense. I don’t expect anything like anything particularly unusual to happen, but there are more things in Heaven and Earth, et cetera, et cetera, and it never hurts to be prepared, and I’ve always a big believer in being prepared. And I’m willing to spend on it. Ms. Codswell as well, is the finest that you could hope for in this profession, no matter how the electric lighting in this building is put together, I’m assured she will be able to figure out how it functions and to get it running lickety-split. Tony Stark, meet Dr. Strange. (laughing) And while I’m sure that everyone at least has a mild idea of who you are, Ms. Hayashi. Yes. Hanako, or Hana, if you will. My parents are the countess and count. What? Oh, no, I’m just so enamored, we very rarely have the ability to socialize with such esteemed guests. Oh, thank you, Tichell-sama. My parents are very well known in the scene here, and my mother, very much as her little tea parties, the diplomats, and I’m well-known at all the parties, and I’ve actually been curious when you’ll attend one yourself. Well, I just have to get to that side of the continent. It is good to see you again, though. It is good to see you, and welcome back, by the way, to London, Ms. O’Neill. Oh, thank you. And where’s this from? Oh, I got this from the Dalai Lama himself, my darling. (laughs) The Dalai Lama. I’ve been quite busy. Traveling alone.
Yes. I am Alexandra, I’m a bon vivant, bit of an adventurer, self-proclaimed, I guess, but it works. So, you’re here for a bit of the rough and tumble? Yes. And you’re here to grease the wheels? It’s a lark, we’re gonna have a bit of a laugh, aren’t we? I assure you, Ms. Hayashi has many, many skills, which will come into play when necessary, but everyone has been selected for their capabilities. Ms. O’Neill as well, has quite a bit of experience with antiquities and otherwise, and it’s good to have a couple people who know what they’re looking for. It’s going to be a bit odd in there, there’s a lot being worked on. Most of the exhibits are in total disarray. It’s going to be confusing, and there are, I’m told, hundreds of cats, as well, so there might be a bit of a sound and a smell. (laughing) I should also say, none of this would be possible without Dr. Mason Pocket. Thank you so much for agreeing to fudge a bit of paperwork on our behalf. (chuckles) Well, that’s supposed to just remain between us, Mr. Maryweather, but we’re all mates here. Friends, yes.
Yes. And I am very honored to be in such esteemed company. And I’m merely an antiquities archivist, not famous and world-traveling adventurers, beautiful exotic people. But if after we–
you’re a charmer, though. Clearly.
Thank you very much. And you know, if after we’ve finished in a couple of hours, if anyone would like some light reading, I have copies of my pamphlet, “The Sacred Nightmare of the Ancients”. It’s a piece I’ve worked on, it is really my life’s work, and I believe the countess would really enjoy reading it. Is it a work of fiction, or? It is most assuredly not, actually. I have read it, and I’m looking forward to further funding your endeavors in this study. I think that there’s a lot of interesting research to be done. I’ve actually read it as well. I think you sell yourself short. Why, thank you very much. Ms. O’Neill. You took the words right out of my mouth. You’re writing about shadows.
Yes. Just fascinating. It is only the beginning. Captain, you look a little green around the gills. No, shadows, I may be the one non-believer in the group. You’re not the only one. Yes, more rational minds, yes. No, as far as antiquities are concerned, we certainly have redundancies between the good doctor and Alexandra. Mr. Maryweather was clever enough to make sure that we were covered in that area, so we will be more than adept, and up to the task. Shall we get the lights on? Yes.
Let’s do it. Well then. Good luck, godspeed, and… I wish you all the best. Thank you, Rupert. Yes. Where shall we meet you when we return? Oh, right back here.
perfect. You’ll just make your way back to the royal suites, then everything should be tiptop. Very good. I’m heading to the north hall. How do you think your cat will fare in the contest today? Oh, I have every faith in Kevin. Kevin?
Yes. (laughing) What a unique name.
Thank you. Kevin shall have to meet Bathsheba later today. Oh, that would be delightful. Whilst we’re done with the job. Bit of a play date. Minxy. So– Let’s capitalize on that opportunity, should we all name our cats real quick? (laughing) I think that’s a lovely idea. I think Nefertiti will actually place very well. Wow.
Yes. She is–
Just went there, did we? Brought over from India. She is quite the sight. Nyan is a great Persian, white and fluffy, and very well bred. IO is a tabby. IO, it’s spelled I-O. Wonderful, yes.
Like the cow? Yes, the lover of Zeus. Yes, mine is Achoo, I found it right outside. (laughing) It was in with a bit of cheese. You’re not really a cat person, are you, Captain? What gave it away? You’re a bit nervous, aren’t you? No, no, of course not. It’s all right, we’ll be there by your side the entire way. And why would a non-believer have any reason to be nervous? Exactly. So, we have Nefertiti, Nyan, IO, Achoo, Kevin, and Bathsheba. Yes. Care to place a wager? I’m feeling very confident. Oh.
Oh my. Sure. I’ve just gotten paid. Thank you. Money on delivery.
Okay, good. I’m so confident, I will place 10% of my earnings of this job on the line. Oh, god.
I will accept. I might as well start a book, it’s worth 10% from Septimus, okay. I will call. I love Kevin, but it’s not worth mine. This is gonna become a Cat Fancy sim so quickly. (laughing)
Isn’t it? That’s why I agreed to this. This is gonna be my next game, Call of Cthulhu Cat Fancy.
(laughing) You knew what this was when you did it. I didn’t really think about it, and then earlier, Brittany went, “Cats?” And I was like, oh no, what have I done? (laughing) I know, we’re just gonna go to the cat room and we’re just gonna hang out there the whole time. Yeah. Well–
20. With this many cats, what room is not the cat room? True.
(humming) 20.
20%? Oh.
My goodness. Very confident in your cat, really. You know.
I shall meet it. Good lord.
Excellent. Getting a little rich for my blood. I will meet as well.
Sporting. The British Museum does not pay quite that well. But thanks to Mr. Maryweather’s generosity, I shall join at 10%. 10%, lovely. I like to keep my money.
Yes, IO, IO comes from mythology. Yes, well, with the champion blood running through Achoo’s veins, I will abstain.
(laughing) You better hope that there’s no flies about, then. That’s a little mythology joke for you. Exactly. I’m so pleased. All right. Let’s see about those lights, then. Down the north hall? So… as you make your way into the next room, you step into a massive… steel and glass pavilion, two stories tall, like stepping into the greenhouse of giants. It is… There’s a sense of vertigo to the sheer amount of space. In front of you, you see many, many yards forward, the beginning of the bazar stalls where people are selling odds and ends and wares. Past that, the more crystal walls have been set up that… shape in the individual exhibits. You’re not sure which ones are beyond that. To your right and ahead of you is a giant three-tiered fountain indoors, with water just careening down it in three directions. It’s a special system, they even had to develop a special water tower just to get this amount of pressure to create these fountains. It’s quite a sight, and makes quite a noise. To your far forward and to your right is the main entrance to this wing of the crystal palace. It is very dark, and there are smaller rooms to your left against the wall, but it is a little disorienting. There’s moonlight, but it’s very dim. Do I get a sense of where I need to go to turn on the lights? Or can I make the first roll of the game? Why don’t you roll as I get the thing so I can know what I’m doing. It’s all the way over here because I have too many pieces of paper. Spot hidden? Make a, I’ll give you something fun. Give me something fun. Let’s use a… Where’s something fun? (humming) I know I’m doing this a little slowly, because I have not looked–
That’s all right. Do an electrical repair roll. Oh, that is more fun. Just to see if you can see where the wires are running to. (groaning) I failed it so hard. You failed that real hard. I failed it so hard. (laughing) I mean– First roll, first roll, first roll. So–
The building is all glass, how can you not see where the wires are going? I know, I’m wondering how I could push. It is a bit chaotic in here. There’s a lot going on. Despite the glass walls, there’s also so many stalls and so many shadows moving against the walls, it’s hard to see what’s what. There’s a thousands lines in here and they’re all shadow. Perhaps, yeah, perhaps… I don’t know. What are you gonna do? Does anyone have a light source that’s not too, you know, attention-grabbing? I just need a–
I have a lantern. You have a lantern? I always keep one on me, I’m an adventurer! (laughing) Prop comedy.
(laughing) I’m assuming I could pull this out now, right? No, you actually can’t. It was sitting next to me.
Where were you keeping that? But it’s over there.
(laughing) Wait, where did that come from and where did you put it back? That’s a lot of fun.
A gentleman never asks, and a lady never tells.
Women and their dresses. So, is the coat check next to the lantern check? You could try and find a coat check. Is that where a lantern would be? Where I checked my lantern?
I don’t know. No, a coat check would be near an entrance, it normally serves to reason– Does it sound like there’s?
There would be a lantern. An entrance would also have access to light. This place is abandoned, where we are? This part of the rest of the house? You don’t see or hear anybody. Yes, could we look for a coat check? Somewhere where there’s a reception area? Mm-hmm. So, you can follow the wall to the left or the wall to the right. The right goes to the main entrance, but that’s probably busy with people. What about the smaller rooms over here? I agree. So, which way are we going?
To the left. Well done. The left to the smaller rooms. To your left, you find past a small open corridor and a set of stairs that look a little precarious, there is a small guard post, there’s a little guard post. Is there a guard at the guard post? There is a guard at the guard post. I want everyone to roll a stealth check. Oh dear.
To the left, to the left, everything in the guard post to the left. I passed that one, thank Christ. Roll die. So, you’re running–
Definitely failed. These two, and then you’re trying to get underneath your stealth. So, everyone’s rolling percentiles– Did you have 40? And attempting to roll below their percentiles. So, you passed, 28.
Single percent? And then this. Oh wait, how much did I fail over here? I have failed. Oh wait, you’re right. I’m sorry, so, you failed. Oh, of course.
(laughing) So, you wanna be lower than your number and if you’re not lower than your number then you fail. I’m quite–
which number? Your stealth should be on the final column– Did you see it?
Oh, there it is, yes. 40.
I rolled a four. Okay, so these two Jabrodys failed. Quite silent.
Two fails. Three fails. You picked Jabrody?
(laughing) Success. I feel like perhaps maybe the entire party doesn’t need to do this sometimes. Sometimes it won’t be the entire party, this time it’s the entire party, ’cause you all just Scooby Doo’d into this. Yes we did. (laughing) I don’t have a stealth.
If you don’t have a number then it’s just 10%. Hey, bro.
It’ll just be that– Oh, it’s actually right here, same as mine. Can I sort of tiptoe past, since I’m the only one that seem to have succeeded. Oh, this one, yeah, okay. You are probably hiding behind the larger person of the group. You can certainly duck behind so that the guard doesn’t see you, but he does see the rest of you. I suggest the Captain– Oh, right, what’s all this, then? Hello, my dear, my dear sir. One military man to another? She’s probably quite charming. My dear sir.
Yes? My friend here has something of hers that she’s left in the coat room. Yes, so sorry.
Where might she find it? How would you leave something in the coat room? That doesn’t make– And is there anywhere else to get more champagne? Is the Cat Show going on right– Yes, we all have cats in the show. We’re quite nervous, something to settle the nerves. Oh, right, so, when did you leave your coat? Was it today, was it yesterday, was it? It was earlier today and I just got so wrapped up in the chaos, I’m not sure where I left it. Hold on, hold on, it would probably be right here, this, I see. Don’t have a coat here, let’s. Can I keep an eye out behind us for anything weird? Sorry.
Yes. Go ahead. Since I’m not being seen by the guard, can I keep an eye out from behind us for anything weird? Nothing weird so far.
Okay, great. And while he’s searching, can I look to see if he has a light source? He does.
How close? I mean, I don’t think you’ll be able to get past him to get to it, but it’s there. Okay, okay. ‘Cause he’s working by it.
Okay. Well, all right.
Lamp. What does it entail? (blows) It’s a lamp.
(laughing) It’s very specific, it’s a very specific coat– Yes, it’s gray, it’s got these scallops. I got it the last time that I went to Russia, and I would just hate to lose it. From the Czar himself.
Exactly. There’s– Please, can you go back in the back and just check for us? The back’s quite far away. Please. I’ll tell you what. If it’s not here, it’s probably been moved to, well, they wouldn’t have moved it to the back storage ’cause that’s full of cats right now, so they probably have moved it over next to the electrical arcade. Oh, where’s that? Oh, that’s just past, have you ever been here before? No, first cat convention. Well, welcome I suppose, although, it does terrible things to my allergies. I try and stay entirely away from that, it’s been killing me all evening. Oh, I’m so sorry.
It’s not nice. But, I’m not really supposed to leave the post. We can go by ourselves.
Well, we’ll manage. It’s all right, she can get another one the next time she’s in Russia. Yes, we’ll just dip in, dip out, you won’t even notice we were there. That seems fine, let’s– Where did you say the electrical arcade is located? Well, it’s hard to… Hold on, I think I’ve got something for you here, hold on one second. And he pulls out a– Map? A map for you all, like a–
Oh, thank you. We have it over there and at some point I’ll put it in the middle of the table so that you can all see it a little bit better. I can do a little We Are Here for you. And I’m gonna show you on the map where this storage closet would be where they would be holding the coat. Yes, perfect. Yes, the switch closet is what I meant. Little rooms.
The what? Let’s… Attempt a charm roll. That’s the entrance, I had it backwards. Me, or her, or both of us? You. Well, both of you.
Okay. What’s your charm? I’m just realizing I’m not great at this. (laughing) No, you’re not. Oh, pass.
Come on, Dora the Explorer. Oh, I actually succeeded. 30%.
Charm (laughs) yeah. He saw you eyeing the lantern. Did he? It’s a beautiful lantern. You can take it, it’s not. I assure you. You can take it with you as you head down there– Really? Thank you. Just so you don’t trip over anything and I’ll get in trouble. And I suppose that’s just a loss on the champagne then, isn’t it? (laughing) I say this with as much honesty and relative humility as I can, do I look like the sort of person that they would tell where the champagne is hiding? Right, well.
You have an honest face. I’m sure they would’ve told you these things if it had been important. Bless your ignorance, child. Anyway. So, good luck to all of you, and just–
Thank you. Try and get in and out as quickly as you can. You’re welcome. Do we have money in this game? Yeah, do I? You’ll have a little bit of pocket change. I’ve given you all a little bit of pocket change. For Mr. Maryweather, I will give him a generous tip for his help. Wow, thank you, sir. It was awfully kind of you.
Well, thank you. And let me know if there’s anything else you need, I suppose, and yeah, just don’t make too much trouble, all right? You all– And what was your name again, sir? Oh, it’s, that’s right. My name’s NPC, there we are.
(laughing) It’s Mr. Wayland. Nigel Peterson.
(laughing) Esquire the Third. Joseph Wayland’s my name, at your service. Thank you.
Mr. Wayland. Please, let me know if there’s anything you need. So, you have that map, and actually, do you wanna grab it, or should I grab it? I can grab it if it’s easier for you? Your pants are more exciting than mine right now. Well, that’s not true, my pants are exciting, just in the wrong way. Use your imagination. God, you look like a ghost, Marisha. I know.
You do. I feel like you should be haunting a house right now. The ghost of Christmas past.
In the house. This is good.
All right. Prop number one, you have a map. Okay.
Excellent. That’s okay.
So, you can see down there, that’s where you entered into right there. Down there.
To the right. That’s where we just went into? That’s where you came from. Open corridor right in front of you is the guard post. Stairs, stairs.
And beyond that, right past the medieval court is where you would find the electrical arcade. Oh.
Okay. So, shall we head there? Yes, let’s go. We head there. Excellent. So, walking past the surprisingly shoddy Byzantine exhibit that’s been overtaken with crates, in fact, I will say, as you walk through the palace, it has seen better days. And maybe it’s just because all of the exhibits are in a little bit of disrepair because they’re setting up a new exhibit, But there’s an age to the building, it’s not holding its own as well as it should be, it’s starting to show… Show around the edges, the places where it leaks from the rain are becoming apparent, especially in London. And the only light we have in here is coming from the lantern, correct? And the moonlight, because the walls and the ceiling are all translucent. The crates in the Byzantine court, are they all old and dusty like the building or does it look like there’s anything that’s been recently delivered? Oh, many things look like they’re recently delivered, yeah. Obviously they have just shoved things in every corner because cats are nightmarish. And that’s why we love them. Yes, you’ve said it, friend. This does not look like a well-organized machine, this looks like a giant mess. But you do make your way past the medieval exhibit to the electrical arcade. It is a long corridor, heading up, of course glass, and tables and tables and tables of machines and devices of every sort, running into cables that go up into the ceiling into what are obviously a series of what were once gas lamps but have now been completely retrofitted and a few interesting attempts at brand new devices. Hundreds of different designs of light bulbs, some of which obviously are not necessarily working. Different types of engines, steam engines, electrical generators of all sorts. Could I… roll something, potentially, to see where a particular piece of machinery is– Of course.
That I might futz with. You can use spot hidden, or if you want you can use one of your science or electrical– Let’s do electrical, although, it fucked me over last time.
Your time to shine, Ms. Codswell.
What are you looking for, out of curiosity? Something that my previous employer might have. The on switch? I’ll tell you what, since you’re looking for something Edison, and you would know what it looks like, roll with advantage.
Okay. Yes. I got it anyway.
All right. Yes, you do actually. Off into the corner on the far right table, you don’t only just recognize something of Edison’s, you recognize one of your designs. Oh, fuck. That piece of shit.
I’m sorry? I’m sorry? (clears throat) Nothing, nothing. Can I sort of, surreptitiously start like, fucking with it? (laughs) You’re going to walk over to it? Yeah. You definitely see that it’s there. What you see is a small portable sterling engine using a gas displacement system of your design, with the name of a very particular person connected to it. There’s Jasper Stagwell’s entry into the Crystal Palace. Can I… take my tools out and just (clicking) disconnect some shit? So, you don’t have tools at the moment– I don’t have tools with me? Because yeah, you don’t have any on you. I didn’t bring any? It is rather small. In fact, actually, since we’re staring at it. I’ll tell you what. I mean, it is right here, to be fair. (gasping) Oh, fascinating. What is that? Yeah, so, it is right there. Is there something we should be concerned about? Nothing. Do you know that they invented an electrical device in Japan in 1776. Have you heard of it? What is it?
It’s called an Elekiter. Elekiter?
Yes. A man named Gennai Hiraga created it. Do you know anything about that? I don’t know about that, but I know about this. This is my design. And some asshole put his name on it. What exactly does it do? It produces electricity. Really?
Yes. And he stole it from you?
Yes. Classic. ‘Cause I punched him in the face. Anyway. Let’s get the lights on, shall we? Can I look about to see if there’s anywhere in here? I hold up the lantern, perhaps? Yeah. Make a… Actually, no, it would be you because you would know what it looked like, unless you want to attempt to explain it. Do a… a electrical, yeah, electrical repair roll. I did remember reading about that, I enjoyed that story. (sighs) I failed again. Gave him quite the bruising, if I remember.
It’s eluding you. There seems to be–
I’m upset. I’m not thinking straight. You’re not entirely thinking straight, if anybody else just wants to help out possibly. Is there anything I can do to assist you here? I need to find, what am I looking for? I’m looking for specifically– It would probably be a point of contact with all the wire, where there would be a main switchboard system. I’m looking for a switchboard. While she’s hunting about, I take a few steps forward and place fingers to my temple, reach the other hand out. I would like to attempt to sense any aura in the light chamber. Anything to worry about? Roll an occult roll. Parapsychology, I believe. Psychology, all right. New game, who dis?
I know. That is a success. I think I’ve given you. You’ve got your room notes in there, so– I thought as much. Actually, yeah, you didn’t even need to roll that, that’s in the room notes, go ahead. Are you well, Septimus? I am well. We are not alone. Well, there’s quite a few of us here. I was going to say the same. Yes, yes. I am eluding to a presence on the other side. Oh, for god’s sake. I’m looking for a box with lots of wires going into it, can you find it?
Metal, wood? Metal.
Yeah. I will search. Alexandra, will you keep an eye out just to make sure we’re not visited by– Yes.
Roll spot hidden. I look to see if we– That’s called spot hidden on here? Fourth column on the right.
It’d have to be lower then? I did not succeed on that. Ah, that’s a shame.
Can I look for the– Something on the other side? Metal, electrical box.
Yes. Sure, roll– Are there any wires running from this machine to– There are a lot of wires running through this machine. There’s a lot of– Seems to run on some form of electricity. (laughing) Yeah, you can either make a… Make a spot hidden check, or make a… Or a science check. Both of those are shit.
(laughing) Let me help you with this as well. Spot hidden, and where’s science? Can I also?
Mm-hmm. Oh, fuck that one.
Oh, don’t do that one. (laughing) You can also suggest things and I will tell you whether or not they’ll work. How’d you do?
Oh, no, that’s bad. ‘Bout as good as me.
I shit the bed. It’s very dark in here, I’m so sorry. I’m so delighted that you are all stuck trying to turn on a light switch. (laughing)
Fuck! While this is happening I’m keeping track to make sure that no one is following us. Roll a stealth check. Stealth check? Stealth or survival, up to you. And may I try to spot the box? Actually–
Who will spot the box? Nope. Fail. You are all hilarious. It’s below.
Oh. That’s the director of (muffled). Or is that, no, that’s 100. It may be 100. No, ’cause you can’t get 100. So, zero zero is super low. Zero zero.
You got exactly. It occurs to you, you’ve been here before. (laughing) This–
In the daylight. Oh. You’re a little distracted, and I also think maybe perhaps you were taking the measure of some of the people around you. I was a little intimidated, yes. You can go ahead and lead everyone to the contraption about five meters down on the right. I apologize. I haven’t got my head on straight. I think I know what you’re talking about, I think it’s right down here. Thank you.
Oh, wonderful. To be fair, it’s a bit dizzying in here, does anyone else feel that? Absolutely. Man was not meant to live within glass. No.
Agreed. Ms. Codswell, is this what you’re looking for? I assume it is. Yes, let me just get the lights on– Just a moment. I’m sorry, I know we’ve been instructed to turn the lights on. This whole house of glass. Won’t that give away what we’re trying to do? It’s just this wing, surely. You can roll. Actually, this is obvious enough that I think there wouldn’t even be a roll for it. There are very obviously breaker switches to different chunks of the Crystal Palace, and it is pretty well marked that you can just turn on one chunk of them if you were so inclined. Keep it in the darkness until we get to the wing that we need, right? Right. Which I suppose is, we don’t have a sense of where it is, do we? We wanted to go to the north hall, right? Well this is–
This is the north hall. Oh, the entire thing. We don’t have a sense of where the casket is? Nope. Somewhere in there.
But we do have a map, and one area says the Egyptian court. Suspicious. And if I throw this breaker, it would illuminate this entire section of this map– Only one way to find out. Great, good, yes.
I say we do it. One vote for do it. We’ve got the guard on our side. Fair enough. Uncertain–
Maybe we want to go room by room with the lantern first, carefully. Yeah, I feel like that might be smarter. As you wish.
Sure. We can always start with the Egyptian court, that seems to be the most obvious of plans. And currently, are we closer to the outside of the medieval court, or are we more in this direction? Yeah, you’re on the, what would be the far side, so, the French area right over there. Okay, okay. And the breaker’s kind of in the wall? It is.
This place is massive. Surely we can’t all crowd around the lantern and get the whole thing. The breaker runs the lights to an underground generator from what you can glean, or you assume such. Make a. Make a, make a.
Make a, make a. What would you wanna roll to see if you, I would either say roll an electrical repair roll, or yeah, if there’s any other skill to just sort of examine this really quickly so that you can. I finally fucking passed it, just barely. Yeah, that is–
Literally just barely. I’m so glad it’s not me. It’s so good to be on this side of that reality for once. What I will say is this. You definitely know that you can isolate the lights to this section of the Crystal Palace. You also can glean that the way that this is set up… as long as you have some sort of generator pushing through this thing, you should be able to get light through it. So, this system is pretty open, so all you would have to do is roll it to the generator down below right now, and this is just nice push button solution to a light problem at the moment. I will also say that the farther in we go, my senses are heightening. There are spirits all around us, and for the most part here, I have no worries, but again, further in, I sense a change. So please, watch your steps. Your spirits don’t like shadows, right? So, shall we just–
turn on the lights. Turn on the light.
Doctor. I second Mr. Goodfellow. And only out of curiosity, Septimus, what will these spirits do? (laughing) One can never predict out here, I believe. What have they done to you?
They are marking our. What have they done to me?
What have they done to you? These–
Did they hurt you? Good lord. They have never hurt me. If one is open and willing… They wish to talk in their way. I see. I see. Consider your words heeded, sir. Okay, so–
Lights? Lights or not?
Lights, yes. I believe lights.
Flick. The room illuminates brightly with electrical light, it is a brilliant, beautiful sight. You hear 30 cats go (hissing). (laughing) Oh no, don’t. You know, I’m gonna say there’s enough white noise from the fountains that you probably don’t hear the cats go, “What the fuck is happening?” (laughing) Also, to be fair, being cats, you just turn on the light, I think they all did this in unison. (laughing) Are there any cats in the room that we’re in now? There are no cats in the room right now. I should’ve made you roll for that, but that’s okay. Nevermind.
(laughing) Cats.
Roll for cats. Roll for cats. There are no cats in the room, although, now you see the tables and tables and tables of exhibits, it’s truly spectacular. You do hear from down the hall, just a little, “Everything all right?” Oh yes, Mr. Wayland, everything’s fine, thank you! Well, just reminder, that your generosity’s always appreciated, and just please turn off the lights once you find your jacket. Most assuredly. Almost there. And if any bubbly shows up, you know! Nothing to worry about, just go about your business. Nothing to worry about, just go about your business. Is there any sort of skulduggery I would want to do here other than what I’ve already done? I’m guessing no, right? I mean. Honestly, I don’t know. It’s just sittin’ there. I’m going to take it. You’re gonna take it?
I’m going to take it. What are you doing with that skull? (laughing) I love skulduggery. Just a little duggery.
Ya dugger. I’m duggerin’ it. I’m sure if there was time, I’m sure you’re welcome to examine a few other things and see if there’s other things around here that this was just, you rolled, and this was the first thing you saw because it was from your head. Right. I’d like to look around. Okay, have a little look around. Can we roll for fancy in here? (laughing)
Spot hidden? Just for clarification, the casket is, what are the dimensions?
Two feet long– It’s about this, about this. Okay.
It’s a carryable. Okay, great.
Heavy, but carryable. Do we know if it’s made of wood, gold, metal, jade? You would probably know that it is made of stone, of like a light limestone, but carved ornate, and relatively thin, it’s surprising. The descriptions of the casket that I’ve read say that it’s of limestone. So, hopefully you can lift it. But yes, with some ornamentation on it. Excellent. And can we look around the room to make sure that it’s not visible in this room. Yeah. Would be a very short adventure. Do you know what kind of roll you would like to make, or you want me to tell you what kinda roll to make? Spot hidden, perhaps. Okay, yeah, make a roll. Nope. No. Just a bunch of things I don’t know. There’s a lot going on in here. What about anything of a particular value that is small in size? Describe small in size? Nothing quite that small around. There’s nothing pocketable. That’s probably one on the smaller end of the sorts of things that you’re generally gonna find in this room. What about anything eclectic or strange? Literally everything is eclectic and strange. What’s the strangest, Taliesin? Roll a… Yeah, give me a roll. Probably either a… Intelligence or a spot hidden. Whatever you feel like. From characteristics up top? Oh, gotta go with intelligence. Oh, nice.
Yes, found. There’s a very odd wooden box that looks very old. Is it behind glass, under glass, or out? It is definitely behind glass. What’d you find there? Something very old, and very interesting. Maybe extra credit for later. Or extra credit for now. I can help you with that glass. Do tell.
Mm-hmm. Show me what you’ve got. Does it look like the glass can be opened, first off. (laughing)
Show me what you got. Show me what you got. What is the one for this one? The skills are always, I’m just getting used to this again. To see if there’s a lock. Yeah, take a look, do a little bit of a… Do a… Do an intelligence roll for this one. Just straight intelligence?
Yeah. And while she’s looking at the glass, I know what this is, don’t I? You do know what this is. I succeed. Just barely, also by one point. Yes.
The case can be… Appears to be locked, but can be opened. Is on an easy hinge. It’s one of those wooden lifting tables there are five or six interesting pieces of engineering ephemera in this, these particular ones are a small pair of tongs that seem to roll into a weird, almost heart shape, that look like electrical energy is generated between them. There’s this old wooden box with a floral… design across it. It’s very interesting. There’s a couple… what appear to be jars of liquid with salt crystals starting to form on the edges of them with wires running between them. But yeah, they’re in a case and there is a lock. Are there any potatoes? What was once a potato is now covered in vines, strange eyes, yeah, no, there’s no potato. (laughing) I love a good potato clock, though, I almost bought one. Does the case have any glass behind it or is it jus the top.
Just the top. Let me see, do you mind if I take a look? Sure. All right. Lock pick. Go ahead, give it a roll. Give it a roll with advantage. Also, quick glance, no one’s walking this way, right? Still very unimpeded. Give me a, yeah, just a… Yeah just a–
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Give me a–
Gonna break. A stealth or survival for this one, I know I’m using this a little weird, but I’m in the mood. Pile of skill.
Straight up– Actually, give me a listen. Lock picking is better. Oh, 20, not great. Fuck all that.
(laughing) Yeah, it’s quiet as a mouse, everything’s fine. I sort of position myself in front of it and with extreme success, I– Very extreme. What did you roll? A 10.
A 10. Oh, nevermind, I was gonna give you a little bit of a, nevermind. A 10? Yeah, you manage to pull a little pin out of your hair and I don’t even think you make eye contact with the thing, I think you just dangle it and it pops open. You have quite the eye for things. Did you learn that at the embassy? Oh, you know, just little things you learn at finishing school.
(laughing) Finching?
Sneaking out? Yes. For an adventure. For finching?
Finishing. I like it.
oh. The case is open. All right.
What’s inside? It doesn’t look like it’s alarmed, or. Perhaps. I’m gonna spot hidden.
Spot hidden. Alarmed? Spot hidden, yeah, spot hidden. 1800s.
Had they invented that yet? (beeping)
Shit! Just barely. Wait no, I wanna do this at, this is difficult, so it’d be at your half level. Oh. Should I roll again? What’s your spot hidden?
It’s the guy going, “Hey!” Oi!
16. So, did you go under 30?
Put that back! No. Looks fine.
Hmm. Difficulty means you have to get double what you would normally get. So, if it’s a 60% advantage you now have to hit 30 or below. So, instead of 60 or below it’s now 30 or below. Looks fine.
Looks fine. Why all the hubbub over this– What do we see inside?
item? Yes, do share. The two jars, the box, and the odd tongs. Oh, I thought she opened the– Oh, she opened the case, but there’s a little wooden box inside. Care to share what all the extreme attention is over? It’s just a little trinket from my country? Real country?
yes, the old country. The mother country. Are you–
I grab it. Oh, wow. Are you joking?
Are you serious? (laughing) (beeping) Just kidding.
(laughing) This is like 1890, anything can happen. Some drunk asshole in the corner goes. (beeping) What was that? Red laser lights.
(laughing) Entrapment. Exterminate, annihilate, destroy. Incredible. Oh, we’re doin’ good. Cool, cool, cool. So, yeah. It’s the old. Are you opening the top of it? She done it.
She done it! I mean, the top comes off. She gone and done it.
She’s done it! She done it. So, inside–
she gone and (muffled). Inside you find all of the parts to the static generator and a small piece of paper shoved in the corner. Wait, what?
This is doomed! It’s all good. So– Is the static coming from that? Something written in a language of the Orient. Is that a static generator?
It is a static generator. It is a static generator. This is a hundred year old static generator. Oh. Hundred years prior to now.
Are you actually trying to? Wait, what? Is this a machine that you were talking about? The Elekiter. The Elekiter?
Yes. So wait, it’s here. Odd, isn’t it? You know there are labels in the cases, if anyone ever bothers to. No one goes to a museum and reads the labels. That’s really frustrating. Picture’s worth a thousand words. What does the label in the case say? The label in the case says “The Elekiter, 1776, Gennai Hiraga “built in Japan, static electricity generator “traditionally attached to a chemical battery” Well, I mean, if you’re looking at it from the right angle you’re just take it back. I didn’t even look at my paper for that. Exactly how I’m looking at it, you’re so clever. Yes.
Does it in any way resemble what our dear genius over here– Oh, nothing quite as fancy as that. Yeah, this is a Model A. This is a Tucker… That’s a Tesla. Gotcha. For real. Okay, yeah. May I look around to make sure. I mean, ’cause we’ve got the lights on, we’re in a room full of stuff. Can I look and make sure that the casket is not here? Yeah, you can do a little look around for the casket. Would that be an archeology roll, or? I’ll take an archeology roll for that, sure. Can we look to see if I see any jade? Yeah, you can take a look for. Yeah, give me a… Unless you have something that you wanna give me a reason why you use it, I would say just a straight intelligence roll. I like it.
Quick question. You’re Taliesin Jaffe, so is there an actual Elekiter in that box? No, sadly. Although, it is in fact, based on the real Elikiter. Oh, wow. Actually built by Gennai Haraga in 1776. That’s amazing.
That’s a good replica. Yeah.
Yeah, wow. Our prop department don’t fuck around, man. (laughing) Gennai Haraga is an interesting historical character. Highly recommend, if you’re bored, look him up. He wrote some very, very nice reviews of the best gay brothels of Japan when he would walk around. (laughing) And a pamphlet on farting. And a pamphlet on farting.
Pamphlet on farting? Yes. Is that what you’ve got right there? What is there to report on farting? I’m curious, I as a player, my kanji is about at a 2nd grade level, so. I’ll also say that that kanji is not in fact what the, I didn’t have time to actually have it translated. Although, I don’t remember– Is it about farting? Did you Wingdings the kanji? (laughing) No, I tried to at least make a bit of a… What’s the word I’m looking for? Easter egg, if I recall. It’s a review of the most recent Sailor Moon musical. (laughing)
Amazing. Oh man. I was in a bit of a rush. But at least the signature is correct. Do you wanna try and translated it, or who wants to give it a roll, give it a go? Well, we can give it a little bit. I’m sure your Japanese is far better than me. Well, let’s do it together. All right, maybe you could teach me a thing or two. All right. And I rolled a 55 looking for jade. Anything jade? Anything–
Nothing catching your eye. Copy that. Again, a lot of machines in here, it’s mostly machinery. Same for, what was your archeology roll? No? This room actually is not nearly as packed as some of the others, so it’s a little easier to look around and see that this is– It’s mostly machinery. This is also still open to the public, so this is the very edge of what’s closed. You’re right on the border of where things just become chaos. This is probably a bridge too far, but since we’re talking about farting, could I say that I brought in a box of Kevin’s droppings and I’m going to put it in place of where I found this? (laughing)
Yes! To really, to the fucker? (laughing) It’s London in the 19th century, you probably have some shit in your pocket. I’ll allow it.
(laughing) Fuck you, Stagwell. Like San Francisco in 2019. Yes.
Scared. We both succeed
Both succeed. Okay, so you get the best of it. I have different levels of translation that are available. Oh, I wanna hear all of them. Things can go wrong.
Konnichiwa. Or just a really heavy accent. (laughing) Congratulations, you now know what the note says. This is our best gift to you. I’ve discussed at great lengths with my fellow, Franklin, Toda, Daniels, and Fan. We have tried to cast a net around the world. We leave it in your hands to finish the weave. To be known, even itself is to destroy. Therefore it fears out sight, and would drag us back into its shadows. Oh, it fears our sight, sorry, and would drag us back into its shadows. Good luck, may light and knowledge prevail. Gennai Hiraga. He’s very flowery. It, what is the it that that text is referring to? The shadow.
I’m sure I don’t know. The Shadow. Wait, what were the four or five names again? What was it? Probably just a coincidence. Franklin–
Are there coincidences, Mr. Goodfellow?
Toda, Daniels, Toda. T-O-D-A, am I saying that right? Yeah, Toda.
Toda. You’re correct. Daniels and Fan.
Daniels and Fan. Well, this was created in 1776, and Mr. Benjamin Franklin was around about that time, and experimenting with electricity and keys. Yes. Make a history or archeology check. Okay. At difficulty.
I feel like. Difficulty? Yeah, half point. What did you say? History, or–
Or anthropology. Or archeology. Fuckin’ do an escape roll.
Actually, anthropology. History I’m fine with.
(laughing) No, there’s no way. No, fail.
A lot of “Where in Time is Carmen Sandiego”. Okay, nevermind. I know a few things about history. You can also make a history or anthropology roll at half difficulty. I’ll make an anthropology roll. 36, so, 70.
just failed. 70? So–
So, 99% chance I’ll fail. So, half difficulty means I actually get– (laughing) Yeah, I have my little.
Oh, you’re kidding? You all right?
So, I need 35? To walk.
You need 35. It’s just out of reach. Just out of reach. That’s okay. It’s right on the tip of my, ah, can’t remember. That’s all right, we have plenty of time. Tongue, on the tip of your tongue. I tuck it away under my skirts. Known even to itself destroys it, therefore it fears our sight. Fears our sight. And it would drag us back into its shadow. Ah, there’s that word again. Yes. May light and knowledge prevail. Well, that’s also fairly thematic. Plenty of light.
Mm-hmm. One more, I’m so sorry. One more time from the top. Could you translate again? Yes. Forgive me if it’s a little stumbly. This is our best gift to you. I have discussed at great length with my fellows, Franklin, Toda, Daniels and Fan. We have tried to cast a net around the world. To leave it in your hands. We leave it in your hands, sorry, once again, still learning. To finish the weave.
It’s antiquated. To be known even to itself destroys it. Therefore, it fears our sight, and would drag it back into its shadow. Good luck, may light and knowledge prevail. Known into itself.
Net around the world. Why, Ms. Codswell.
Definitely. (laughs) Ms. Codswell seems very well equipped to take up that mantle, then. Bringing light to the world, yes. I do dabble. Well, there are myths about darkness, and light fighting darkness, and if one were to cast a net of electricity around the world, it would put light everywhere, forcing anything that fears light away. Seems a rather Herculean task, the entire world. Oh, not so Herculean if you have the right tools, like this little beauty here. I think there should be electricity in every home. A wheel in every home. Electricity in the homes of poor people? (laughs) She’s a witch! Preposterous! Mark my words! Well, one can dream, it is a lovely dream, darling. It is worth noting that you did work for a company for two years that was doing that until they had to close because it was a nightmare and everything was going wrong. So, you did just get laid off from at job– Mark my words! That didn’t go well.
(laughing) Worth noting. I’ll see you burn in Hell!
(laughing) Yeah. High class swap meet aside, perhaps we should try to get the thing that the rich guy wants? We are on a bit of a schedule. The next room, perhaps?
Where do you wanna go? Shall we head to the Egyptian court? That seems a good place to start. I agree.
Yes. So, you walk north, up– And have we turned the light on in the court yet? The lights are on, the lights are definitely on. It is well-lit. It’s not beaming, but it is definitely, to the outside observer, it would probably just look like work is being done. I’m sure work has been being done at all hours thanks to these bloody cats. So, you do, you can make your way to the Egyptian exhibit with little to no fanfare. Very good. As we walk, I talk to Mr. Goodfellow. It seems Mr. Hiraga was a believer as well, if I interpret that correctly. Well… We’ve been speaking to the other side for thousands of years. And our understanding evolves and changes with the passing of the years, but the core remains the same. We’re all just reaching for the same truth and describing it in different ways, I imagine. Pardon my ego, Mr. Goodfellow, but speaking to the other side is a bit quaint and pedestrian. I would be careful what you attempt to reach for. There are scary things on the other side. You sound versed yourself. The things I’ve seen, you wouldn’t want to wish on your worst nightmares. Shall we continue on? Yes.
Yes. Certainly. Do we need to be stealthy? Are there other people in these rooms that we’re attempting to enter? You don’t see anybody yet. Actually, honestly, because of the hour and because no one’s really paying attention, I think you kind of have the run of the place. And is this a fountain? That is a giant bloody. Do you wanna go take a look at the fountain on the way to the Egyptian court? I do. I’m quite the fan.
(laughing) Is this the three tiered fountain you were talking– Mm-hmm. It is a phenomenal piece of engineering. It is beautiful. I sadly can’t show you these until later, but just so I get my description correct of it, correct I’m gonna– Is it the pictures of all of our possessed bodies? It is, in fact. I know what all of you look like when you’re dead. Eyes scratched out. Those are in Taliesin’s bedside table. (laughing) Actually, it’s a series of layered almost crystal chandeliers that are, just cascading water pours over them, almost like a dining room that is just sitting in the rain. It is just these beautiful, beautiful arcs of glass and stone with crystals hanging from, and the water pouring down them in these beautiful streams. And three high-pressure streams making their way through the front and two side chunks of the fountain. Are you taking a serious look at it? I’d like to. There is also a plaque on your end of it, if you guys are heading to the Egyptian court, there is, in fact, a plaque that can be read as well. I wouldn’t mind nonchalantly striding up and reading, as I toss a– And might I say, as a museum employee, I would really implore you all to read the plaques. We put a lot of work into them. (laughing)
(clapping) Any coins in the bottom of the fountain? Are people–
Oh, quite a few. I will toss a coin in. Toss a coin in the fountain. All right, do you want me to read it, or do you wanna read it? ‘Cause I have the plaque here. You can read it at your preference. I enjoy your voice, it’s a voice that’s launched a thousand shipwrecks.
(laughing) The plaque reads. Very true. Oh, Crystal Palace, when I stood within thy walls not the first time or the second I had sought those gleaming halls. Far before me in dim distance stretched that fairy-like arcade, glorious objects faintly looming through the half-mysterious shade. All my parted earthly treasures, some that I may see no more, ’til we walk in the light together on the golden Haiti shore. Oh, thou source of light eternal, hear the nations when they pray, and through life’s long night of darkness, guide them into perfect day. William Makepeace Thackeray. Delightfully whimsical. This plaque seems to have been… Somewhat a recent addition, probably within the last 15 years. It’s been bolted on, covering a previous plaque, is what it looks like. It is a copper plate, if anything, more than a plaque, I suppose. Oh, thou source of light eternal. Bit obsessed with light here, aren’t they? They are.
Any symbols, logos– Well, it is a crystal palace. Or icons on that plaque?
Yes, but shady and shallow. No, just the four bolts that are kind of holding it onto the masonry. Bolts, or are they–
Bolts. They are bolts.
Screws? If you had a screwdriver it would not help you, but they don’t look. They’re jeweler’s bolts, they’re not necessarily… They’re tough, look at them, who knows? They on there good and tight? Far before me in dim distance– I wouldn’t say that. Stretched that fairy-like arcade, glorious objects faintly looming through the half mysterious shade. All my parted earthly treasures. In the arcade? The whole place is an arcade, really? But specifically–
There was. The electric arcade? Is the plaque on this end of the fountain? Mm-hmm, right at the front. I’m gonna fiddle with one of the bolts. You’re gonna fiddle with the plaque? Mm-hmm.
It’s a little loose. Ah, nice. I mean, it’s spinning, but the plaque is just, not to be too inside baseball, you ever attempted to pull the sword, the Excalibur sword from the stone at Disneyland? Mm-hmm. It’s got just enough give to irritate a child for hours. (laughing) I say definitely not from experience. So, yeah, it’s definitely, again, this place has seen better days, and they really oughta get a man in. So to speak. You think the Captain can yank it off? Oh, I’m sorry, yes, are we removing this? I was enjoying the rhyme. Are you a poet, Captain? No, I also don’t read very often, I suppose. Not enough. Could I try and– well, you did that beautifully, anyway. Thank you. Could I try and use my cane to. Well, the cane itself is too thick to slip underneath the–
No corner or edge to pry? I mean, there are corners and edge to pry, but your cane is a cane. I mean, you would need something thinner to pry properly. Can’t just pull it? Do I see anyone else looking? Only the companions that your employer gave you. Do me a favor and take a step back, will you? Oh, all right. I’ll take the top of the cane and I will remove the sword from beneath it. (clapping) I cannot believe you convinced me to let you have that. Sorry, a relic of the Second Afghan War. An officer and all that. And I will stick it under and try to pry open a little. I was gonna make this a harder run. Make it a strength check. Straight up. Should be good.
maybe. Come on.
40… Nine yes. Succeed, which is, yeah, just a regular success. It takes some doing, and you don’t quite pry all of them off, but just enough that it kinda slides off a bit. Oh man, this is some… You just did some damage to the fountain. (laughing) I mean, the fountain’s still operating, but you did just, yeah, you gave it a good pry and it definitely has kinda unhinged off. Okay. They really need to do some work on this place, and you just probably cost them a bit more money. Good thing our employer’s very wealthy. What you can see now, though, is that that plate was covering a time capsule. (gasping) Oh, my god. Oh, shit. Oh, his things that he left. His precious treasures.
Right. Well, most buildings had them. It was not unusual to, usually put under a deeper stone, some sort of time capsule, usually in the christening of a large building like this, you would fill a box, an airtight box with a bunch of ephemera of the time that it was built, and then pour the concrete over it so that in 300 years from now or otherwise, people were supposed to open it. Something like this would’ve probably been more of a please open in 50 years, and there would be some record in the– How long has it been, then? We don’t know, because this one is not labeled well. It’s just got a poem, which is odd. Another poem? Oh, the plaque.
No, the poem that was just– The poem he read.
I see. Captain. Can I reach in and remove the capsule? You do. There’s a bag inside. There’s just a small rough bag. Burlap, wool? It’s just a silk velveteen, but it’s rotting pretty nicely. Could I make a survival check on this bag? Yeah, I don’t like burlap ephemera. To see if the bag survives? If there’s something weird about it, or a smell or something.
sure. I didn’t make it.
Could I help her with that? It smells winter fresh.
(laughing) No, it’s definitely mildew-ey, it’s just gross. But there is something inside the bag. Well, any objections? No time like the present.
Oh, please. Open the bag. And no present like the time capsule. Oh! I love presents.
Are you all right, Septimus? It’s Thackeray. Thackeray wasn’t, not much of a– Fine input, go ahead. Much of a sorcerer. I’ll remove the contents of the bag. You find an odd red crystal. How do we know? An odd red crystal? A very, very odd, red crystal. (yelling) I’d be careful with it, but yeah, you found. It’s a little odd. Do I recognize it?
A red stone? It is a red stone. Is it red iris, by chance? It’s not squishy like that on, is it? I don’t know. It is not squishy like that.
(laughing) Okay. And don’t prod it too much, but definitely, it is an odd ruby red stone that’s circular in form. (yelling)
(laughing) And it has– It’s climbed up his urethra! Veins of a black onyx material that run through it, this particular one forming an odd pentagram, or a five-pointed star. And yeah, roll a, I mean– Mr. Goodfellow, do you sense anything? Have I seen anything like that in my travels? Give me an occult roll. Oh, that’s the first one, right? Mm-hmm. I don’t have a good occult. So, it’s just .05, ’cause unless– Yeah, or you can use. Throw me another stat if you don’t mind. Intelligence is 80, or–
I’ll let– Or psychology is 50. I’ll let you take psychology as 50. No.
Alexandra. No, I think you’re… I don’t remember if I put it in your book, but unless I put it in your book. Which, you’re welcome to check your notes to see if it’s there, but if it isn’t there then you don’t know.
That’s why I asked, it is a little unsettling. Well, red stones are very common in mythologies of cults throughout continents. Cults? Might I do an occult check. You can do an occult or an anthropology or archeology check. And does this look like the same one that I saw– That’s right, you’ve seen one. Maybe I’ve procured, yeah– It is. You absolutely recognize this. Yes, Hana? What is that? Well, I’ve seen one of these before. Oh.
you have? Yeah. Go ahead. Yes, I succeeded. It didn’t have a star though, it was a different symbol. Okay. It was a spiral. Success. You have read quite a bit on the possible interconnections of all these different belief systems, and the red gems show up over, and over, and over again, often described as a source of power, whether it be light, heat, or emanation. You’ve also read of some possible ways to activate these gems, although it would require maybe sitting down and fiddling with it for a bit, but again, that’s for later. But there’s definitely, you know what this is, and this is definitely an activatable point of power, according to your reference, of some kind. I’ve seen one of these at the… Likir Monastery–
Good notes. In Ladakh. This is a very powerful relic. They keep theirs locked in a temple. They call it the red iris stones. And they’re believed to… guard arcane doorways and protect this realm from that which should not enter. If no one has any objection, I would like to call dibs. On the stone?
On the stone. Oh, I might have an objection, but we’ll talk about it later. Thank you very much. Locked away in a monastery, temple, what did you say? Yes, in India. And it guards a doorway? Yes, the monks of Likir have been very adamant at attempting to defeat a creature that they have called the Village of the Hungry Knight. Is that an exact translation? I believe so. I’m not entirely sure how a singular monster can be called a village, but– Must be a very big monster. I agree. Its presence is unquestionable. Wait, of what? The stone?
Yes. Well. Yes. Did you want to hold it, Septimus? Not I.
Ah. Make a power roll, really quickly, Septimus. Oh, shit. Oh, I rolled a wrong one. I could pretend like the 10 is a one, or I could roll that again, 25, is under 40, so, a success for whatever just happened. You sense specifically what’s in your notes… You sense from your notes. It is a risk to hold. Oh, like I’m doing now. (laughing) I thought you weren’t worried about stuff like this. I’m not. (laughs mockingly) (laughing) Badger, I would be very careful. Roll a constitution check. (gasps) Shut up, really? No way. 40, I succeed. He crushed it.
I hard succeed. Everything’s fine. Do you feel faint? Dizzy, strange?
No. Well, let’s do our best to perhaps respect the custom’s follows, then. And I would rescind my dibs.
And Badger, I want you to be in constant communication with us if you feel anything untoward, anything out of the ordinary at all. If it would make everyone feel much better, can we just put it back in the bag, and then you can just carry the bag. Excellent idea.
Perhaps that’ll be enough. Shunk. Your appearance drops 10 points while you smell of the bag, sorry. (laughing) That’s precious, I can’t lose that! Come on, man! Can we switch chairs? I don’t really want to be next to him. I would really drop that bag at some point, that’s rank. He’s just so unattractive, it’s making me– My mom said I’m the most handsome boy at school. (laughing) He’s just a shower away from pretty again. Damn. And a can of Dapper Dan. Shall we try the Egyptian wing? Yes. On our way in, would I have known about the Elekiter? Would I have heard about it? No.
Okay. Although, you know what a static electricity generator is– Right. It’s a big crank that they rev up and then the static electricity charges, and they normally stick two little prongs in that thing, and then you get a little (buzzing). You start to get an energy charge from it. Cool. Hana, would mind if I took a. Hana, is it, sorry? Hana, yes.
Hana, would you mind if I took a look at that?
Oh, not at all. And is there a roll I can make to sort of, ascertain anything widgy about this guy? Make a widgy roll.
It has a key. Yeah, you can make an engineering roll, or a. That’s interesting. Yes. What’s this?
That’s a key. Oh, I was actually supposed to. Oh, all right, all right, yes. A key? It’s fine, I don’t know. It’s Taliesin, there might be keys in things! They’re everywhere. Sometimes things have keys. It seems to have a false. There’s something in here. Oh.
Oh. Oh, I didn’t even need a roll. Is there a key hole? I’m looking. Do you see anything? This is a breakaway something. Perhaps it slides. Seems like. Does it slide?
This is so dope. I don’t even know what’s happening. It’s a puzzle box or something. Oh, pull that directly. It’s cut here, so– Try the same thing you were doing. Is there another?
Should I pull on it? I don’t want to break it. Try sliding perhaps. He seemed to be okay with me to be– He did say yep. (yelling) Oh, shit! Oh, shit! That’s fuckin’ teamwork!
(laughing) What? (gasps) I got goosebumps. Can anyone read this?
Yeah, you die instantly. Yes.
(laughing) You die instantly. There’s also an object that– Oh, there’s more. But wait, there’s more.
There’s more. It’s a coin. Well, the coin is actually a token for the thing that was actually making noise, which will not fit in that, ’cause that’s smaller than the real box. Inside, you find a… A small bag. And this is so you can display it later so that people at home can see it, but you find this bag inside, and this was the thing that was making a little bit of a ruckus. Does this one stink as well? (laughing)
Can I look and see– No, this one is actually, weirdly dry. This is from the Orient, it smells great. It smells better, can I get my 10 points back? True. (gasping) Here’s a little, if you want to just leave it somewhere so you don’t have to–
This seems sketchy. Oh, it’s very sketchy. You guys are doing quite well. What does this say? I rolled and– Let me move my giant ass map from the center. What did you roll? I can come back to this.
A hard success. That will do.
Oh, sorry. For the translation. Hard success?
Yes. The electricity, Alexandra! To be fair, this is not a difficult piece of translation since it’s such a short sentence. O’Neill (muffled).
In the same handwriting as the previous note, is that. A dark reflection can reveal intentions. Be safe. What is that? What did you find? It’s a black mirror. Where did it go? My god. Oh, here it is.
it is black. It’s a small black mirror. Perhaps we should look around corners and– It’s reflective, isn’t it? And the first text that you read talked about the entity, this something being shown itself. (laughing) To know itself would destroy it. What did this man know? Does anyone with–
Fascinating. More knowledge of this kind of thing know what this is. Actually–
It goes in a lock. Yes, thank you. Does anyone have any more insight than that? Thanks, Grog. Thanks, Grog.
(laughing) Occult roll? Occult or anthropology– It goes in a lock.
Difficult. Occult or archeology difficult. (laughing) Wait, do I have to say which one I’m rolling? Pick one. Pick what’s more favorable, Dr. Pocket. Whatever’s higher, the higher number. All right, we’ll try for the archeology. How’d we do? No.
No? Do either of you ladies, or? Anybody? Antiquities, come on, man. Just business, know what this is? Archeology, is that what you said? Archeology or occultism, or occult. Would I roll the same thing I did for occult before? What was that? Thought we’d do psychology, didn’t you? Yes.
And a stand-in. Yes, yes, yes, that’s fair. Success from archeology.
No, no again. Success from archeology?
Yes. The symbol on the key appears to be connected to some sort of Roman Glycon cult, perhaps. Roman light cult?
Glycon. Roman Glycon. A later Roman deity with a snake with human hair, it’s a whole thing.
Oh. Oh, a Roman deity–
Snake with human– There’s a roman room.
But a Roman deity. A late Roman deity. Good roll, well done. Kind of a Medusa-esque quality to it. Yes, backwards, yeah. Strange. Was there anything actually relating to any sort of mechanism at all in here? The mechanism works. I mean, you could get it to work, it would make a static-charging electric generator, but it would be, it’s hand crank. It’s mundane compared to the other shit that’s inside. (laughs) Perhaps, and I say this with such love and affection, Tucker was a little bit too forward, it’s a Model A, and that’s a Tesla, yeah, it’s– Hold up, hold up, I’m not gonna be able to let this go. This deity with human hair, it had human hair? Or hair made out of little people. No, long blonde hair.
(laughing) Good point, good point. (laughing) Well observed. Who doesn’t like Glycon? Glycon’s great. You said reverse Medusa, I went. Everybody likes a Glycon.
A snake with human hair. Did we ask about who that was? No, we didn’t, who’s this? William Makepeace Thackeray, do any of us know– That would be a… That would be a intelligence, or education roll for anybody who wants. Oh, good, me? Yes, one moment. Oh, my education’s really good actually. Be right with you. I have a hard success. Hard success?
Oh, extreme, baby. Sorry. He’s a living well-known poet. That’s why I don’t know it. (laughing) I’ll just– He did not serve in the war.
No. Give this back to you.
Oh, thank you. Good work. He’s a popular poet.
That’s brilliant. Okay. Well, I don’t know what this is. Should we go to the–
Yes. Now, what’s– Egyptian room, or the Roman– Before we go, I have to ask, Septimus? Yes? Is that okay? I’m beginning to think I’m the only one with any sense here. I am not–
I’m messing with him. Sure. I’m right here.
(laughing) Literally right here. No.
That’s awkward. That is basically a mirror. Oh, that’s late here. I’m so pleased. I do think we should have that at the ready for whoever is leading the charge. All I know is, if we find any green glass, I’m out. Green glass? Why? Red stones, green glass, black mirrors, these are all symbols that recur throughout mythologies. I think we’re doing something more than just a delivery. Like what? I don’t know, the talk of powers and beings, and shadow and dark. We may be stumbling into something far greater than what Mr. Maryweather has led us to believe. You think he is part of the occult? Possibly. Maybe he’s part of the new age group along with Franklin, and Toda, and Daniels. Well, it’s all very popular. It’s an old age group. It’s very popular for salons to speak of things like Tarot and astrology, and shadows and monsters, it’s the trendy thing to do. I can tell you that Mr. Maryweather is an enthusiast, a collector. As the keeper of his house, I can tell you, he has many of these sort of artifacts on display. I’m sure it is merely avoiding paying a high price for such an item. And remind us, how long have you known Maryweather, Mr. Badger? Few years. Actually, finest job I’ve had. He’s a good man. Odd, into… the shadows and such, but a good man. Has an appetite for the strange and unusual then? A bit.
Who doesn’t? Yes, the successful always seem to, somehow. They’ll believe any worth. (laughs) Well said. The Egyptian room? Yes.
Yes. Yes. You make your way north up into the Egyptian room. This section has been partitioned off to be a little more cozy and a little… It’s a feeling of sacredness, I suppose, by it. They’ve reconstructed a chunk of arch from what are obviously pilfered pieces of shrine and temple and attempted to reconstruct them as best as possible to kind of give a… The appearance of walking into a temple. As you walk in, there are statues, and tablets with hieroglyphs on either side, statues of Egyptian gods and goddesses going up to a… large shrine to Isis, to Osiris, at the very, very front, with a couple of boxes set to left or right, including a couple more lanterns, if anybody wants to grab one, there’s two or three hanging around. I’ll grab one. You’ll find them by your feet. And also, you can actually turn that one on if you like, if you hit the button once it does light up. Button?
I will as well. Not that you need it right now, but yeah. Oh.
Click it one more time. Does it flicker? Yeah, click it one more time. One more time again.
I will as well. There you are. Yeah, double click it again. Is this arcane light? Extinguish it and replace it with. That’s better.
There we are. (laughing) Also, as we’re walking, I’m coming no closer than 10 feet to Badger. Sure.
Let’s put it down. Yeah. For the smell of the occult gem? And do remember, these are hot, so be careful. Pick your poison. Hot to touch, I’ve burned my hands on. And these, of course, are electric, but the real thing is hot enough that. I briefly thought it would be fun to get the real thing, but then I remembered that I burned myself the last time– Yeah, yeah, yeah, you don’t wanna do that. Are there–
Those 10 appearance. Lock boxes, boxes with keyholes? Lock box.
Take a look around. Lock box. See what you see. Use either a spot hidden or just a straight intelligence check if you don’t wanna get too deep into things. Let’s go with a– I will search for my jade planchette. A spot hidden will get me something better, I’m assuming. It’ll get something a little odder, if you’re looking for odder. I could’ve successed spot hidden. Single expense for spot? Spot. I also did a success for spot hidden. I also did a success for spot hidden. Let me find my notes. Looking for. Looking for odd, or looking for just things. Jade, specifically. No jade to be found–
Okay. That you can see, although, there are a couple crates that are closed, and I’m sure if you asked, you could pry them open. I’m looking for a box with a keyhole. You find no box with a keyhole, but you do find, again, a couple crates, a couple lanterns, and actually, there is a worker’s toolkit. Ooh. So–
I don’t mind, thank you. That you can purloin. I don’t know where I put that, or else I would give you your props. Although, they’re just adorable, not really useful. I’m looking for one that might be what we’re searching for. You do not see anything immediately, but again, you haven’t opened the caskets yet. And did you do a roll as well? Not yet. Spot hidden, 45. Yes. Hard success.
A hard success? Nice. Okay.
Oh, shit. What you notice as you were walking through this exhibit, is that there’s something off about the… statue of Isis. Something off? There’s something unusual. In the statue itself? Normally the crown goes into a pair of horns that are holding a red sun or a gold sun, this sun is black. Ah. Is it… reflective?
A bit from where you are, but you would have to get closer. I go to examine. Is the statue reachable? Is it not? You could get up onto it, yeah. It’s slightly bigger than human size, but you can get up and probably inspect and touch it if you were so inclined. Yes, I would like to inspect and touch it, see if the sun circle comes off. Dr. Pocket? Is something amiss? Yes, this image of Isis is not a normal symbology. Someone has, for some reason, made this differently. I need to see what this is. Are you trying to get all the way up there? Yes, could you give me a lift? I suppose.
(laughing) So, you’re gonna try and lift, and you’re gonna try and dislodge it. Mm-hmm. Make a– Actually, I wanna see if it is attached, as a statue should be, or if it is loose. Okay, you can just make a standard strength check to lift him up there, and then– Black sun?
It is a black sun. Make an intelligence check. Extreme success.
Extreme success? You’ve got him well-handled. Bing!
Intelligence? Just an intelligence check. What is it?
(laughing) Go, Dr. Pocket, go!
(laughing) 12 times. Extreme. Ooh, he’s smart. Hot Pockets.
(laughing) Wow. Much like a piece of campaign furniture, this statue is, in fact, designed to come apart in pieces from its original design. This mirror is big. I mean, it’s much larger than that tiny one that you found. Does it bear any similarity to this one? Yes. I mean, there are obvious differences, and if you’re close enough to examine it, you probably can already see, it’s not the flat– Not a flat black. It’s not the flat black that you’re used to, this piece has a little bit more of a concave build to it, it’s not a flat piece, almost like a dish. And there’s something about it that’s been treated in some way, with some chemical, perhaps, and you can almost make out, there’s some scripting on it, but it’s very, very hard to see. Oh.
How are we doing, Doctor? There’s writing on what is supposed to be a sun. Is there any way to read it? Do you need more light? Pass up a lantern, or bring it down here? Can we bring it down? You can make an attempt. How heavy is that? You’re not–
you have no idea how heavy it is.
Oh, god. Oh.
Do it. Do it.
All right. Are you gonna make a strength check? I’m gonna make a strength check. Make a, yeah, a strength check with difficulty. It is difficulty. Oh, all right.
Uh-oh. This is not good. No, just wait. 40 strength, 17. [Marisha And Travis] Ooh! Lucky fucking, crushed it. The librarian’s been workin’ out. You have lifted it, and so you’re now holding it. Make a dexterity check with difficulty. Wobble, wobble, wobble, wobble, wobble, wobble. Whoa, oh.
Oh, fuckballs. No, that’s a bad failure. Why did the man who needs a cane– (laughing) Because of a war injury. Fair enough. Oh, you need the cane. I thought it was just an affectation. I did, too.
I did, too. I mean– I’ll try to dive and catch if it falls, if it comes to that. There’s a tumble happening here. There’s a bit of a tumble. Do you wanna try and. Are you trying to catch people or objects? Object.
(laughing) Okay, this is going to be a disadvantage dexterity. Dexterity.
Dexterity at disadvantage. Oh my gosh, so under 30 at disadvantage. Mm-hmm. I would also like to run for it. Yeah, can we all make a dive? No. Can I throw bodies just at it? I mean, I think he got in– First?
All right. I just–
yeah. Sure, it’s all right. This is not football.
(laughing) Are you sure?
Crash. So, sadly, oh no. One of ’em did. But is it metal?
Really? Oh, shit.
Eight. Ah! It was not metal.
(gasping) It was glass, and it shatters, loudly. Shit. I rush to the door to see if anyone has heard. Lanterns off.
Lanterns off. Wait, is it light in this room? It’s still light.
It’s still light. It’s still light? Fuck it, lanterns on.
(laughing) I love the double click. This thing is ruined. Completely and utterly ruined. Dammit. Does anyone that’s very socially adept want to maybe–
Oh, that’s all right. Skitter out and see if–
Is Mr. Wayland on the way? Mr. Wayland?
Is anyone coming? Anyone coming?
Are you listening for him? Yes.
Roll listen. Yeah, I ran to the door. Shoulda just. Light up. Oh. That’s okay. It happens, you know? Sometimes you shatter artifacts. Egyptian artifacts.
It seems fine? Hmm, yeah, I don’t hear anything. All right.
Are you still listening? I’m going to go to the entrance of this room, just sort of Dudley Moore against the side of the doorframe in case anyone comes. I think we should make quick work of what we were looking for in here and then leave. All right. I start–
yeah? I go with him. I’m going to try to brush the shattered shit underneath something. Suddenly there’s a popping sound out of nowhere. (popping) And the lights begin to flicker a bit. (Erika gasps)
Oh. And suddenly the power goes out, (snaps) just like that. You are now in the dark other than your lanterns. Is everyone all right? It’s the perfect mood. This doesn’t work, does it? I mean–
Nightmare fuel. Or does it? What do you mean, does it work? Is there a way I can use this to generate light? I mean, technically speaking. Yeah, you know how this device works. So… That by its nature turns heat into electricity, so you would need some sort of energy or heat source to connect it to, and then you would have to wire it into the main wiring plug that you saw earlier. You could bypass it. You looked at it long enough to know that you could absolutely bypass it, especially with the tools you now have, but you would need to create some sort of heat. Heat? That may be enough, possibly something a little heavier, though. Ida, what did you do to the light? I didn’t do anything to the lights. But why is it dark? You saw, I was right on this crate! Well, we have lanterns.
it may have shorted. And perhaps this is maybe a little less– Conspicuous.
Yes. Yes. The building is in disarray, it probably just shorted. I could go back and try to– (shushing) Anything? Everything’s a little off. Can I reach down and grab a few of the shattered pieces of this thing and shove them into the bag along with the (imitating gagging). (laughing) Ya ever heard of–
You may. I look into the darkness, into the shadows, and start paying attention to the shadows. They’re very dark.
Very dark. Can I do a listen roll? You can do a listen roll. Oh, yeah.
Fuck. I think that I got that hard. What’s a 1/5 of 50? I’m not good at math, even though I’m an engineer. 10. I did an extreme then. Extreme!
Extreme success. Extreme success! Definitely… The music that was coming from the main party seems a little muffled. Perhaps the short caused some problems in other parts of the building. That would explain that problem. In the distance there’s, I mean, maybe it’s just adrenaline, but… The building is settling a little. It’s nothing unusual. You can hear a little bit more than normal, though, because the power that runs the fountain seems to have been cut. Oh. But you don’t hear anybody moving around out there. Well, let’s get on with it, then. Might I suggest, between the Roman Glycon symbol and the fact that the casket we’re looking for is limestone, perhaps the Roman room might be– Yes, agreed. ‘Cause it seems like they’re placing items in the realms that they are connected to. Seems like as good an idea as any. Shall we?
Yes. As we exit the Egyptian room, so, the fountain is no longer making sound? No. Is there water in the bottom of? Well, there’s still water in it. Standing water. But the pressure hoses have obviously been cut. That’s unfortunate. We’ll have to be a bit quieter. That’s all right. Let’s check the Roman room. If we don’t find it there we can come back and check these crates. Careful.
Yes. What is it, Septimus? There is a restlessness growing. A what?
A restlessness? A restlessness in the air. You’re probably just sensing my frustration, let’s move. The darkness.
To the Roman room. Yeah.
Moving. Moving towards the Roman room. Everyone make a stealth roll.
Will not save you. Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. A what roll?
Stealth. Stealth.
Oh. Oh, terribly.
Got it. Super fail. How many successes, how many fails? Success. Success, success, fail. I love it, success, fail, fail. Half.
50/50. Considering where we are in the game, I’m gonna let it slide. (laughing)
Okay. Lord Taliesin. You may not be so lucky later on. Not psyched to know what that meant. No.
Tentacles. So, moving on to the Roman room– Where is my Eldritch Horror? (laughing) The Roman room… has been. It’s completely empty. Honestly, there’s not a lot of Roman antiquities in here. It’s also very hard to see, ’cause it’s very dark. You’re only doing this by oil light, by lanterns. The Roman room has been overtaken by crates. There’s a couple antiquities, a few helmets, a few other things. You would have to go in deeper to see if. I don’t necessarily know what you’re looking for, but it would be a difficult investigation of the room with the current light level. Are there any statues? There are no statues in the Roman room. That’s odd.
That is odd. Maybe they’re not out of the crates. We’ll keep an eye out. Perhaps they’re roamin’ the building. Oh! Boo!
Oh my gosh. Don’t do that, don’t do that, don’t do that. Can I check the crates?
Some Weeping Angel shit. Yeah, let’s at least open one of these up. Yeah, can I check the labeling on the crates to see if any of it corresponds with the shipping paperwork that I had to do to send it. Yes, that’s very clever, actually. That will give you a slightly easier time. You can take a minute and just do a straight intelligence roll to see if this matches any of the numbers that you put forward. Come on, Pockets. Dark Pockets. Oh no. How bad of a failure? 99.
Six over my intelligence. Six over. Okay, so, that’s not a huge failure. Can he push?
Is it a luck spending time? Okay, this is a thing you can do. You can spend luck. Thank you for–
What? Yeah.
You can spend luck? We could be adjusting our rolls? Pushing the roll, you could try again. Although, you only have a certain amount of luck, so if he spent six, then it would go down from whatever your current luck level is. I’ve got so much. I wasn’t gonna let you start using that until this point– Oh, sorry. But no, this is the correct point, well done. Thank you for–
okay, good. So, we could spend luck to succeed, or to re-roll?
You can. You can push a number down by that number. Right, so if he spent six luck. So, I’ll talk six from my luck and push it down to–
To succeed? My intelligence.
It’s a success. Cool.
Okay. Is there any limitation to that? Could you blow it all in one go? Not that I’m going to. As far as I know, you– I think it’s just, but then you only have a certain amount of luck. Yeah.
Yeah. So, if my intelligence is 70, I gotta push it down to 69 to succeed? You have to–
or is it 70 or below? 70 or below. So, you could yeah, I believe it’s 70 or below. Oh, it’s my turn. I was like, is anyone gonna say nice– Equal or it.
(laughing) Gotcha.
Equal or. Okay. Children.
So– (laughing) Or… Oh, no, you have to be one below, I’m so sorry. Okay, so–
Yeah. So, yeah, I’ll push it down. It’s all the other six, it’s just equal or. I’ll use seven luck.
Okay. Thankfully, you take a second. You were a little thrown by everything. It’s very dark.
It is very dark. And the moonlight is being, for some strange reason, a little more… uncooperative than before. Passing clouds, maybe, something is just, it’s making it difficult to pay attention. None of these numbers correspond on the crates to anything that you would recognize. Okay. Should we go back and check the crates in the Egyptian room, just in case? I suppose so.
We’ll look at the numbers. If you do, I could try and contact Mr. Wayland, let him know everything’s okay. We could also try to jerry-rig this into the system and get some light back, unless we feel comfortable doing this by lantern, although, I’ll need to. Would all of these lanterns be enough? But then we’d be wasting our only light source. Yeah. I’ll head with Mr. Pockets back to the Egyptian room to check the labels on the crates, and help him there. He didn’t go to medical school for you to call him Mr. Pockets. Oh, I’m sorry, Dr. Pockets.
(laughing) He didn’t go to–
I didn’t go to medical school either–
Medical school period. (laughing) Ph., not M.D.
(laughing) So, the two of you are going to split off to the Egyptian room. Check the numbers in the Egyptian room. And what are the rest of you gonna do? I’ll go find Mr. Wayland. You’re gonna walk towards Mr. Wayland– Yeah, just to– And what are the rest of you gonna do? To re-tip. Does it say–
I will also go. I’ll go with Mr. Wayland, yes. Go charm him? Yes, we have a rapport. I suppose.
We’ll be right back. I shall keep you company– Start with the two of you then. Start with the two of you. You go to the Egyptian room to. Actually, no, we’re gonna do you last. I’m making some decisions. All right, who are the other group? We haven’t been to the Byzantine court. Nope.
Shall we? I don’t know, might as well.
You want to push on ahead? It’s a bit of a backtrack. Otherwise, we’re just sitting here with our– Don’t you have the key from the Roman room? Oh yes, can I look for anything that has a– You can. Yeah, just– That’s right, the Roman room, right? Pick either a hidden, or just a straight intelligence check. Straight intelligence, ’cause I’m looking for something specific. Thank you for reminding me. Oh, I crushed it though. You crushed it?
I crushed it. Oh you did, damn. There is, in fact, in the corner, a large metal chest. Ornate with silver inlays and a strange coiling, like they’ve hammered the silver out to look almost like a reptile skin. It’s beautiful, and there are three cut pieces of stone set into the top, in sort of a cross fashion, of red, black, and green. Oh, look at this. I bet our key might fit in here. Shall I pop it open? You want to go ahead now when it’s just the two of us, or? Oh, what could happen? The casket might be in here.
Yes. I take several steps back.
(laughing) RP. Shall I? Fuck it.
Yes! Click. You open it.
Mm-hmm. You turn the key? (laughing) Double question. Yes, say yes. And the lean in.
yes. From just behind you, out of the corner of your eye, you just hear a (knocking). Make a sanity roll.
(yelling) A what?
A sanity roll? Sanity roll.
Come on, baby. Welcome to Cthulhu, Travis. Oh, I fucking crushed it, dude. Sorry, so sane. Sorry.
(laughing) Kids throwing stones at glass, it’s terrible. Stop trying to make sanity rolls happen, Taliesin. They’re not gonna happen. (laughing)
You rolled a six? I rolled a six, that’s a six. She rolled a six.
You are. Iron clad
Mind– A Steel trap.
(laughing) What’s the phrase? Some of us are just so sharp we could cut ourselves. What’s your sanity?
You open the casket. Sanity.
Oh yeah, oh yeah. What’s inside? Well. Oh, dear. Oh, god. Let me consult. You find–
Tickle me Cthulhu. (laughing)
Which are my– Ia ia Cthulhu fhtagn.
(laughing) You find… an odd stone. Another red stone, but this one has a strange, almost snake-like tentacled–
tentacles! Shape to it. Another one of the crystals. I take another few steps back. Oh, you don’t like these, right? Here, is there something. Was this actually in a bag? It was in a bag.
I’ll slip it in. Very well done. So, you found that.
Feel better? So, moving on to Travis. I wish that I did.
(laughing) You are going to walk towards the front, towards the–
Along with Hana. Oh, the two of you are going that way? Yes.
One second. Captain?
Yes. I’d like to thank you for your discretion. But of course. (laughing)
What? I’m sorry? Mr. Maryweather was grateful for your participation in this venture. It’s a bit of a lark, isn’t it? It’s really why I agreed. Mommy and daddy don’t need to know about the necklace, though. Still, there are definite… bonuses to this little adventure. So, really, I should be thanking Mr. Maryweather for finding me red-handed with that necklace. Yes, I think that would go a long way, and also any other bonuses you may find, I feel inclined to speak on behalf of Mr. Maryweather that you might be able to keep them. Thank you, that’s very generous. Why are you here? Why, I’m here to make sure that this car stays on the rails, as it were. And to assist, of course. Really?
Yes. A very tough, very capable former captain, a veteran, working as a butler for Mr. Maryweather, an eccentric American. It’s very unusual, don’t you think? Yes, well I do anything and everything that Mr. Maryweather requires. Keep his house, check his financial records, books, look after his interests and affairs. He’s a good man. A bit strange, but good. It’s like a script that you keep reciting from. It’s a good one. Wouldn’t you agree that there are dark corners in this world? Easier to find than the light? Everybody’s got their dark corners. There’s so much sexual tension. I know!
Buff alpha (muffled). (laughing) Oh no, 40 now. My appearance is 40. She’s got a hanky and is like. Wouldn’t you agree?
(laughing) The halitosis is terrible. Last time on “Gentleman Jack”. He’s been very good to me. I had a string of bad luck for a while. Well, I hope your fortunes turn, Captain. Thank you, Hana. Well, Ida, if you’re looking for a heat source– (laughing)
Talk to these two. So– We approach the guard position. From your… God, you’re using the oil lamp. Just one. Yeah, he’s not directly at the post, you don’t see him at the post. He said he wouldn’t leave his post. Yes. Would you like to get closer? Yes. He said it in such a friendly way. I’m sure. Why would he leave?
As it it’d be a lark. Yes, we’ll go check his station. You walk up to the guard station at the front and you take a look around. And you do see Mr. Wayland, he’s actually a little bit off, he appears to be staring. You can only see him from the back, as he’s staring through the glass with his own lantern up, apparently just looking outside. Mr. Wayland, I’m sorry to disturb you, I’m sure the racket must’ve. What are you doing? Nothing to worry about. Just go about your business. Is there something outside we should be aware of? Nothing to worry about. Why did the lights go out so suddenly? Nothing to worry about, just go about your business. You mentioned that already. Is there anything we can do for you, sir? Roll a sanity check.
Oh, god. Yes, yes, yes, yes. We’ll have to roll below it. You have to roll below it, which you did. Okay, I did. (gasps) I’m one over. I’m one over.
Uh-oh. Use your luck, use your luck. Push that shit down!
I’m pushing it down! Okay, I’ll push it down!
You gotta push it two down! Put down!
Push it two down, two down. Push it down. Okay, okay. Push it real good.
Push it two down. I’ll push it down. I will say–
Just repress that shit! [Marisha And Travis] Push it real good. What would I call this? Yeah, I’m not gonna either. Nothing to worry about, just go about your business. It’s getting spooky in here. I know. Me versus Badger want to do two different things. Let’s go about our business then, shall we? Yes, let’s. If you need anything, we’ll be looking for a coat. He’s not moving, and he’s not turning around. He’s still looking outside. Lantern raised? Just looking through the window. You maybe wanna look outside? Can I slowly work my way to the right. Can I see his reflection in the glass? No.
(gasping) I can’t?
Or he doesn’t have one? No.
(laughing) You can see your reflection in the glass, but you don’t see his. What does that mean? I don’t know, but my head got tingly. (laughing) Make another sanity roll.
No! Are you all right? You got it, you got it, you’re so sane. Fail, fail, fail.
You’re so sane. He told you to go about your business. Fail.
I failed. He failed. Pretty significantly.
17. Do we start this now? It’s been a while.
It’s been a while. I think your sanity lowers is the first thing that happens, if I recall. Yes, I believe. But not by the amount that he failed by, right? ’90s pop culture reference. Or you roll, you roll for your sanity below, right? Yeah, you have to roll. Roll a D4. That’s right, I remember this. Come here, D4, help me. They’re D4?
Where is it? Do you need one?
Yep. One.
Oh, okay. You lose two sanity points. Okay. Now it’s gonna be that much easier for your sanity to start going wrong. All right. And you’ve gained a compulsion. You are going to have to. You are going to need to check your reflection in every mirror you come across, ’cause that’s fucked up. I’d like to leave, now. All right, yes, all right. We’ll go about our business. Meanwhile. Just checking good old-fashioned labels. You are in the Egypt– Egyptian, looking at the crates, and while we are checking these labels. Dr. Potter, I have been quite consumed with a thought ever since you’ve brought it up. I’ve been thinking about your whole black, red, and green theory.
Yes. Would you like to read my pamphlet? Oh, you’ve read my pamphlet. I have read your pamphlet. I… was concerned when I first met you because… I didn’t want you to know that I believe you are more spot-on than perhaps you even realize. Oh?
I think it’s… for the best that the general public think that your writings are fiction. It keeps the peace. But Ms. O’Neill, I mean, if there are truths that are hidden, we must know them. The only way we can protect ourselves is to know what we are protecting ourselves from. I agree. And it is for people like us to discover that, and we can protect the general public at large. Back to your theory–
Excellent. The ulterior motive that I am here for, the monks of Likir have asked me to find a relic. A green relic. A jade planchette.
Oh. They themselves are already in possession of a black chalice, and one of those red iris stones, as we have seen here already. So, the jade, the green glass, that– Yes.
Is the only thing missing. I honestly feel quite ignorant that I didn’t even put it together myself, but I’m glad we are here with a librarian, and a doctor. Anyway. Perhaps it’s in one of these cases. Yes. We check the cases.
You check the cases. Check the cases. Do we have to roll– Roll an intelligence check. Just intelligence.
Just intelligence, right? Straight intelligence. I’m going to check the cases, check the cases. Y’all in the Byzantine room? Success.
Success. None of these are what you are looking for. Dammit. However–
Oh, fuck. Out of the corner of your eye, as you’re checking the final case, you… Not in the corner of your eye, this would’ve been just out of earshot, behind the statue that you so recklessly broke. Oh, I forgot about it.
Comes a sound. (tapping) Do you hear that? I do. But there’s no one else in here but us? Ida? Mr. Goodfellow? From behind the statue, just barely in the light from what you’re casting, you can almost make out… two people… standing in the corner, and they’re not facing you, they’re facing the wall. And we’ll be back after this break. (yelling)
No! I got chills!
Fuck! Oh my god. You guys are fucked. Ooh, no. I don’t believe I have any mid-game announcements, and if I do I will give them after the break, because I do not have a thing here, but we’re gonna take a moment and collect ourselves, and– Clean our pants. Have a stiff drink of something and we’ll see you in just a moment. (exhaling sharping) (mysterious music) A lonely tavern set, strangely absent of streaming content. Its patrons waiting for a way to reach their Critical Role content, travelers, waiting to board the subscription train. Through a twisting series of tubes and satellite waves, we here at Critical Role delivered digital content, the form of what society has come to know as, shows. If you would like to view these shows on-demand after the live premiere, you need to enter the shadow land know as the Twitch Subscription Zone. It is simple to subscribe, but there are many paths one may take. This Gordian knot can easily be cut with a credit card, however, if one has an Amazon Prime account, you are guaranteed one free Twitch subscription a month to the channel of your choosing. But, remember, freedom demands agency. For Twitch Prime subscriptions do not auto-renew, and you must re-subscribe each month. For those already in the Subscription Zone who want to spread their fortune, you can gift tickets to the sub train by invoking the Gift a Sub button on Twitch. Yes. Join us. There’s plenty more room for Critters in the shadow land. We here at Critical Role want to say thank you to our esteemed subscribers, and hope you enjoy as much of our content as you can consume, including our emojis, by ArseQueef. And so, ends another inexplicable journey, a twisted car ride shrouded in fog with your high beams on, a complicated parody promo. The Twitch Subscription Zone. Subscribe. You need to subscribe. Twitch Prime subscribe. Gift subscribe. Subscribe. (dramatic music) Well… The group is a little scattered at the moment. A touch.
Well. So, let’s start with… the two of you. But the people standing in the corner! (laughing) Okay, I’m okay. What are you going to do? Yes, let’s go. I want to leave. Let’s join the others, shall we? Yes, yes. That’s fine, then. Did you see him? Who? Wayland?
Mr. Wayland. Yes.
Mr. Wayland? Yes. He was acting very strangely. He wasn’t in the window. There was no reflection in the window, you saw! I’m not crazy! I looked, and there was no reflection. He was not there! You’re under a lot of stress, it’s– I’m. This isn’t going very well at all. It’s fine. It’s fine, let’s rejoin the others. It’s fine, yes. Where are you headed? To the Egyptian–
Back to the Egyptian room. No, the Roman room? Where did we last see them? Well, we’re split at the moment. I am not here to tell you– They were going to– Oh, fuck a duck, where are we going? Some of them were going to the Egyptian room– Let’s go there.
I believe. Let’s head there. Heading to the Egyptian room. To the people? We will never see each other again. We were the Roman room. You two are in the Roman room. Terror-filled, help me (muffled speaking). We just got the ruby thingy.
You just got a ruby thingy. The squish ruby. Okay.
Where to? What are you doing? It’s been a minute, hasn’t it? It has. You know, I am very aware that you are not a fan of the intangible, but I will tell you this truthfully, look me in the eye, you can believe me. I am very good at reading the room. And the room is turning. You’re not really good at reading the room though, are you? (laughing) Look, you were worried about this chest, I opened it, it’s fine. I am a little worried about us getting discovered sneaking about here, though, so, maybe we should find the others and try to get on with it. Very well. Okay. You like the lead, after you. Great. In the Egyptian room, did they say? Yes. All right. So, off we go to the Egyptian room. Oh my god, Phil.
Do you have the mirror? The black mirror?
I have the black mirror. Doctor? Yes.
Ms. O’Neill. There are… They’re hard to see, these two people with their back towards you. They are well-dressed, they’re at least wearing, one’s wearing a suit, the other one is probably wearing a suit. It’s very dark, they’re not– Ada just walked by and I was like. Coming into the light.
(laughing) Ms. O’Neill? Since our mission is to not be discovered, might I suggest we leave before they turn around and discover us? Leave before they turn around and discover us. Is there an echo in here? I’m an archivist, not an adventurer. I don’t think they’re gonna turn around, or they’re particularly concerned about– Turn around and particularly concerned about– Discovering us.
Discovering us. I hear that echo, too. Some (muffled) at midnight shit. They’re casually walking back behind the statue. What do you mean, walking back? They’re moving?
They are. They are stepping very quietly behind the statue into the shadows. They were always in the shadows, they’re now just deeper in. They’ve never faced you. How long until the rest of us get there? You guys took some long conversations, you did not. Did we?
(laughing) I’m afraid to leave, what if they? I’m afraid to stay, what if they? Now we’re echoing.
Oh! Okay.
(tapping) You hear a tapping from outside the room. Make a sanity check, both of you. God.
I don’t want it. Oh, can I push luck? I can push luck on this, right? You can, I believe, push luck on sanity checks. I’m gonna push it by–
Wait. You know what? I don’t know, actually. I don’t have that in front of me. I already did. Yeah, but that was before shit got weird. So, push and luck are slightly different, so pushes you can roll again, and if you fail a second time it’s worse, or you can spend luck, but I don’t know if you can spend luck on sanity. I don’t think you can spend luck on sanity points. Okay. So, if you want, you can try to roll again. I failed. You failed, roll a D4. I believe our good doctor.
Two. Two.
I couldn’t push it– Take three points away from your sanity. Okay. You are going to have a… slight disadvantage with your dexterity, ’cause you keep thinking someone is breathing on your neck. And you keep turning around, ’cause you are being followed, and it’s just gonna make you a little twitchy. So, there’s maybe someone just always standing right behind you, but they keep vanishing before you turn around. Suddenly, the rest of everybody else shows up. He also failed.
You also failed? Roll a D4. Oh, shit. Did you see that? Curved.
(laughing) Oh. You take three points away from your sanity. What am I gonna do to you? (Travis laughs) If I had a nickel for every time I heard that. (laughing) How much would you have? 75 cents.
(laughing) I think you’re feeling a little bit of blame for this system, I think you’re starting to believe that maybe you were onto something. I think you were onto something with your little pamphlet. I think that you are going to start having a little bit of connective compulsion. So… When you start talking about your shadow creatures, not before, but any time you start talking, you’re going to keep talking about it until someone calms you down. It’s just gonna start flowing out of you like a bit of a ramble until you run out of words. Is that happening now? Well, next time it comes up. I see. So, it’s going to be interesting. You all enter the room, and it fills with light from four lanterns.
(gasping) Why are you following me? Have you been here the whole time? We just got here.
What? Yeah, we just came back.
Well, now you need to leave. Is everyone okay?
No. There are people here.
Who? They’re not real people. (breathing heavily) They’re dark creatures, they’re shadow people, they’re shadow people who were very well-dressed, but they– Okay, well, take a breath, take a breath. He’s right.
It’s okay. Doctor. Strange things were happening to us as well. What? What happened?
Mr. Wayland, he, he wouldn’t look at us, and he had– Kept repeating the same thing. “Nothing to see here, go about your business.” No reflection in the window. I know how that sounds, I know what I saw. No reflection?
I saw us. I couldn’t see him.
But he didn’t turn around? Did he?
No. Neither did–
They never turn around. The shadow people never turn around, they’re always facing the other way, because they’re your shadows– What do you mean? What do you mean?
Doctor– What do you mean, shadow people? (shushing) I don’t think it’s a coincidence that there has been a theme of reflections. ‘Cause I broke the mirror. I broke it.
Wait, wait, wait. I take the bag out and I start removing pieces of the mirror from it. Should we look more closely at it? Ida, bring out that mirror you have as well. This? What for?
Yes. Well–
Can we see any of the words? Reflections can reveal intentions. Can we hold a lantern over the broken pieces of the– Can we see any of the words in the broken? It’s shattered, it’s safety glass. What happens if I– Oh, it’s like little pieces. Take that mirror and hold it towards the reflective shards, kinda look at it. Nothing yet, but are you waving that mirror around a little bit? Yes. And I’m kind of doing the… The jailhouse thing. Make an occult or a intelligence roll. Okay.
Up to you. Occult or intelligence. Success. Just for fun, add a spot hidden. Oh. Failure.
Okay. While the mirror’s swinging around– No wait.
Oh? No! That’s–
It’s lower? Equal?
No, no, no, no. It’s not, I was wrong.
Okay. It’s a failure. While you’re swinging the mirror around something catches your eye. You don’t know what, but there’s a momentary glimpse in the black mirror when you’re rolling it around. I turn around. Do I see anything where the reflection would be? I mean, you’re looking in the mirror, where are you looking? But I mean, I’m looking to see if there’s something that would be where I spotted. Where are you looking in the room with the mirror? Like, are you looking at yourself in the mirror? No, no, no, I’m kinda angling it and looking behind me as I turn it. Behind you there’s nothing. I mean, unless, what’s behind you? I don’t know. We’re in the Egyptian room–
May I? So the statue of Osiris.
Yes. I’m going to look towards the statue that the glass mirror broke, where they described seeing people. In the reflection you see two people with gaunt faces staring at you, hungrily. What? Oh, god. Are you seeing–
A man. What I’m seeing? And a younger gentleman, and they are, almost as if they’re held back, and they’re just teeth and eyes, just hungry. Like they haven’t been fed in so long. (breathing heavily) Is there anyone physically standing behind him? I look with bare eyes for a moment and then back. It’s too dark to tell. Trick of the light, maybe? Is there an artifact or something in this room? There’s a painting or something? What are you–
There are– What is happening? Two individuals standing behind me right now. It’s the shadow people. Can I hold up my lantern?
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Carefully. The shadow vanishes and they scurry. (hissing) They’re just gone.
The fuck was that? What was that? Do you see– Is there a portal, or a door, or anything behind the statue? Is there a wall behind the statue, or is it an open space? You’d have to go back there to tell. The mirror is not very good. All right, very clearly we need to get the lights on. And look, I don’t. I’m sorry, I never– The casket is not in this room. We need to leave this room. All right.
We need to get the casket– Let’s get out.
And get out. I don’t mind the idea of getting some light on, except I’m going to need. I have to take a look at it. Captain Badger?
Yes. Can I see that gemstone? That red one? Yes, of course. I take the bag out and remove the crystal. Codswell and I found another one. What?
Oh, yes, we did. Your key, it opened a chest– Is that it?
in the Roman room. Oh, with three stones on it, actually, you mentioned before, black, red, and green. Black, red, and green stones. You said those were indicators of– Cults?
Yeah. And the monks that I work for, the monks of Likir, they sent me in search of a jade planchette. They’ve spoken very highly, and have… invested in some deep protection towards a black chalice and one of these red iris stones. The theme continues. It took me a moment, but I recall the monks having some sort of meditation process with this, and that these can be activated in some way. Activated? How do you mean? I don’t know, my understanding is limited. Do they produce heat?
Yes. Exactly. Do I have–
Or some sort of energy. I don’t know.
Make a… occult or archeology roll for that. Okay. That’s 50. 12 out of 50. 12 out of 50? You have definitely read of these stones, of versions of these stones creating light, heat, cold, they’ve been mentioned as some sort of… almost an elemental keystones that can be charged via ritual or meditation. And you said we found another? Yes, in the chest in the Roman room. Well, let’s see it, is it the same, or different? It’s slightly different, there’s different markings on it. I don’t really know what they mean on my expertise, but– The ones that the monk have have a spiral on it. This is more of an, I don’t know– What about Septimus, do you– Star of a kind. How do you feel about this stone? Pentagram?
He doesn’t like it. Can we activate them and get ourselves some light? What do you mean, activate them? Because the light will drive away the shadow people. If the shadow people are struck by the light, they– (shushing) Doctor.
Pocket. Sorry.
Doctor. Get ahold of yourself. Look, to get the lights back on, I either need to see if there’s something I can do with the circuitry that’s already in the machine arcade, or I need to attach my device with some sort of heat source. So, if you’re telling me that these can be activated to produce heat, then that would help, but I don’t understand how a stone could produce heat. Septimus, could I ask a favor? Could you please hold one of these stones and tell us what you feel? I would really rather not hold– May I?
Either of them. Yes, perhaps you’ll have luck. But I think things are clearly turning here. Yes, I’m sorry, is there something you know that you’re not telling us. No, no, I mean, he was talking about feeling the room and presence, and the lights are going out, and he didn’t have a reflection and he won’t shut up about the shadow people! I just want to put maybe the right items in the hands of someone that might be able to tell us something we don’t know. There is most certainly an ill feeling in the air now, it is undeniable and I am beginning to feel the worm has turned here, and we may better to have made our exit. We can’t.
But why? What do you mean, we can’t? We need that casket.
For what? For Mr. Maryweather–
for what purpose? It’s important, I don’t know! Is it so important that, this? Mr. Goodfellow.
Yes. What did the people look like in the mirror? Lean. Hungry. Not entirely human, perhaps. The Village of the Hungry People. What?
The monster. That’s what the monks told me, the monster, the entity that they were fighting, that they were keeping at bay, the reason why they wanted the planchette. Maybe if we find the planchette we can stop this. Planchette? May I see that mirror, please? Take a quick look at the statue. Are they there again? How well lit is it right now? Come with me. I’ll go with him. Two lanterns. I’m trying to bend it so that we can look at the statue and behind the statue. Two lanterns.
You’re lighting beneath it? Yeah.
There’s nobody there. Look, I’m going to get the light on. If anyone would like to join me, they’re welcome. Yes. See if you can heat this up. I… try to spot anything unusual about it, I poke it and I… You know, feel it. I don’t know what I’m looking for. It would be a… It would be an occult roll to figure out how to activate it. If I roll before, I have knowledge of it but I don’t know how to activate it. No. You could make an archeology roll with difficulty, with disadvantage, and get lucky. Maybe you read something a while ago. Archeology or occult? Whatever’s better.
Probably archeology. I’ll say archeology with disadvantage or occult without. Okay. Archeology’s probably better. Occult.
Right? Is your occult a five or is it an eight? No, they’re both the same.
Oh, okay. Big money.
41. 41.
Occult, occult. What’s your occult level? 50. You know that it requires… It’s a meditative process, so anybody who’s trained in any sort of occult meditative practice, astral projection, tulpa creation, anything like that would be, anybody who has got some basic understanding of how to manifest magical energies would be able to activate one of these stones. To what effect?
We don’t know. Could you tell us what this planchette is, what it looks like? It’s made and crafted of jade and almost has a compass-like structure to it. But it has a hole orifice in the middle. The green–
Is that right? Yeah, yeah, well done, actually. Considering that I don’t think you’ve seen it. No.
Well done. Just what they told me. Ms. Codswell, the green piece that you saw. It was on a chest, it had a black, a red, and a green piece on it. Did it look like it could be made of jade? Yeah, they were traditional stones. It was like a nice stone inlay. It looked jade, sure, yeah. Well, should we all move together and take a look? Do we really want to keep moving in darkness? No.
I say light first. You’re right. Who wants to take a moment? Mr. Goodfellow, you don’t know any sort of meditation that could activate the stones, do you? More like a tuning fork. That sounds like exactly what we need, though. Why don’t you give it a crack? What’s the worst that could possibly happen? Oh, I can think of a few–
Don’t ask that, please. Things. I need a heat source to get the light back on. I cannot promise, but I will try. Is there anything we can do to aid you in this? Watch my back.
Easily done. Done. Are you doing this here, or are you doing this at the generator of conduit point? That seems like a leading suggestion to maybe do it elsewhere.
I agree. Let’s have a little mosey maybe, first. Get the fuck outta creepy– Because if you activate that it will– We don’t know how long it’ll last, maybe. I was just curious.
All right, let’s go there. Let’s move quietly, whether it’s spirits or the guards, I don’t want to be caught. And I would keep that… glass handy. Let’s head to the arcade.
We move to the arcade. From the Egyptian room. Do we have four person Street Fighter? That’s a little rough.
Is it? Well, so, I assume we’re going to move with stealth. Yes.
And with our lanterns. We can try.
And with your lanterns. Yes, assumption ’til the end of our lives. So, first off, I will have everybody make a stealth roll. So, yes.
And, 30. Yep.
Failure. Failure.
Three. Fail.
Do we have– What’s my stealth?
Four failures. Oh, stealth. It’s balls. Oh.
Shit. So–
Wait– Well, nice playing with you guys. (laughing) Eenie, meenie, minie, mo. Cool.
(laughing) As you slowly and quietly make your way to the machine gallery, you huddle together closely with the mirror and the lanterns trying your best to, imagine move as a bit of a armadillo (laughing)
through the area. Would you say a human centipede? (laughing)
Oh, no. Yes. I may re-roll, see if–
Oh, no, no, no! (laughing) Invented by the ancient Egyptians. You’re being careful and you’re keeping your eyes peeled. The one thing that you’re possibly not paying attention to, though, are the shadows cast by the moon on this beautiful steel structure of glass. And… as you… are gingerly making your way there, Hana, your foot falls into one of these shadows. You just step into it, not a big deal. You’re just stepping in.
(laughing) Suddenly two hands grab you from the shadows and attempt to pull you deeper in. You are–
(screaming) (laughing) About to get pulled into the shadow, what are you going to do? Jui-jitsu, jui-jitsu! Yeah, I kick out, I strike out my leg. Remember the papers!
Rear naked choke, rear! I strike it with my leg and move a lantern. Okay, I’m looking up my combat thing. Okay, that’s, where’s my combat? Here we go. A tad creepy (muffled).
Surprise attack. So, what’s your dexterity? 80, 80.
Yes. Yes, yes.
80, oh, that’s good. So, attempt to… We’re going to do a maneuver. What are you attempting to do, then? You’re gonna fight back? Yeah, I kick out and shine the lantern. So, roll a percentile die. She’s not gonna welcome our dark forces, yeah, she’s gonna fight ’em. (laughing) Come on, come on. What’d you get?
How much did you lose by? 86.
Ooh. Spend luck.
I can spend luck. Or you can push–
How much? Oh, push, pushing’s–
Pushing would be pretty risky at this moment, I think, ’cause if you fail again he can do something gnarly to you. Dramatic consequence, oh.
Oh, right. But I mean, it’s up to you. I’m gonna push.
The push? You’re gonna push or use luck? You’re gonna push? You are grabbed and getting sucked in right now. Does anybody–
yeah, yeah, yeah reach out! (yelling) I grab her.
You’re gonna grab her? Yeah.
Make a strength check. I succeed, 39.
You have to make that. Hard success.
That’s, yeah. You have ahold of her, she is started to get pulled and you are pulling against her but there are two people with their backs toward you who have contorted enough that their hands have grabbed her and are trying, not even looking at her to just claw her in right now. I’m gonna let her go.
You’ve got ahold of her but you haven’t pulled her out of the shadow. What do you do? Anybody? The light, the mirror. I pop my lantern up.
Help me! Yes.
I put my lantern toward it. You put the lanterns towards ’em? Yeah.
Yes! I’m just watching in the mirror. They are forward in the mirror. (yelling)
You see their faces. They are attempting to bite and claw and grab right now at her. You guys put the lanterns forward? Yes.
Yes. Yeah.
Yeah. (hissing) They are just, they run at a speed you cannot even contemplate and they’re gone. (breathing heavily) What was that? We need light. We need light. You are bleeding from the back, you have five health points that just took a– Five!
What? What are you at by the way? Oh, shit.
Four. Okay. Septimus is just spinning around trying to see everyone else in the room.
There were claws in you. Fuck it, run! Right, that’s what I was just saying. Run, run. There’s no sense in being stealthy. All right. You make it to the, yeah. You’re there, what are you gonna do? I go immediately to where I flip the breaker and I try to see if there’s a easy way to get it on without using this device. (ticking) Okay, I need heat, now. Septimus, please.
Please. Set it on the ground, set it on the ground. (breathing heavily) If anyone else has any ideas– Light on the ground.
It would be welcome. Set them on the ground. Yes, make a circle. We make a circle of our lanterns around the red stone. I’m just going to– How are you using the lanterns? Just trying to– Oh wait, are you holding the stone? Lanterns cast shadows, is there a way to hold the lanterns so that we don’t cast shadows on him? Well, if we–
Surround us in light. Yes, if we go back to back, or all together– And make a cone of–
And make a cone. Clever. All right, I’ll allow it. Okay, so we do a lantern pyramid. I’m going to place the mirror just above so I can see in it. Very clever. And I am going to focus on (breathing heavily) the energy surrounding this stone, and… reach out to those around me. What are you going to do to the stone? (breathing heavily) What? I don’t know what the fuck that does. Did your accent just change? I’m sorry, I don’t know what the fuck that does. What the fuck is happening? He’s a charlatan, isn’t he? Ah, fuck, we’re so fucked! We just need to get the fuck out of here. I knew it, I knew it! Hold on.
yeah, yeah, yeah. Very clever. We need to get the fuck out of here now. I don’t know what that does, I don’t know what that does, I don’t know what those things were. We need to get the fuck out of here. I had my suspicions, you fraud. Who the fuck cares what happened before. We need to go, now! Wait, wait, wait, are you saying you can’t activate this stone?
No, he’s a fucking fraud! I don’t know how to activate a fucking stone! You have to touch it to activate it. I’m an actor. I push Septimus out of the way and I say, “Fucking move.” Take a lantern, you piece of shit. And I sit down, and I put the, kinda prop up the glass and then I touch them, and I just– Which stone are you attempting to– Fucking both of ’em! You can only do one at a time, you know that. (groaning) I don’t know, what seems more heat-like? The one with the star. Yeah, I’ll do the one with the star. All right. The pentagram.
That’s that one. Yeah, sure, just fucking throw ’em around, that’s good.
The one other. Tradesies!
Try anything. I always go with star over tentacles. I take what limited knowledge I have learned from the monks to study into it and meditate. What’s your POW score? My POW?
POW! Pow!
Pow, pow. Pow, pow, pow.
70. Cool, just make a roll. You know what you’re doing, make a roll with advantage. With advantage.
This time. You know what you’re doing. Okay. What’s half of 70? 35?
Mm-hmm. Fuck, 37. Oh, that’s good enough.
Okay. For now.
Good advantage. Almost, yeah. You meditate on it. It suddenly gets very, very hot, too hot to hold to be honest. Thankfully, yeah, it’s going, but it’s too hot to hold. Do I have it powered up enough? Do I feel– I’m gonna just start attaching things. I would recommend putting it in something. The bag. I would recommend putting it in something so that you can manage it. Okay. (laughing)
Oh my god. I love you so much. Oh wow, I was gonna have to do that. ‘Tis warm. That’s why it’s squishy!
Yeah. (laughing) So, put it in the pouch. Too hot to handle.
Too hot to handle. Too cold to hold.
Oh! I would recommend putting it in the pouch. We should call them ghost somethings. That’s so brilliant. And now I would recommend putting the engine on top of it. Oh, you fucking brilliant bastard. Oh my god.
It’s gonna fucking go, isn’t it?
Oh my god. So, you’re gonna have to give it a second while it powers on–
No way! No way!
Maybe get it out of the bag. I would get it nice and–
There’s no way. I would also recommend turning it so that the audience can see. Oh right, turn it so that the wheels– Yeah, and give it a second, and it’ll probably need a jumpstart a minute, just to give the wheel a little roll. Come on, you fucking bastard. Come on. It’ll take a minute, but yeah. While this is happening– The lights are starting to flicker on, so it’s going to work. Get that fucking thing down. Yeah, you wanna get it nice and firm there, you wanna get the whole surface. Oh my god. Come on, you beautiful bastard. Come on. New accent there. (laughs) Sorry. Come on, keep doin’ it.
Yeah, it’s goin’. It’s goin’.
It’s going. It’s going.
That’s it. You might need one more little bit of love. No, I think we have it. If I push down real hard it goes. Yeah. It’s going. It’s going! Well done. All right. Thank god somebody knows what they’re up to. By the way, is she bleeding out, or are they scratches?
They’re oddly acidic. You’re not a useful doctor, are you? Oddly acidic?
Yeah, it’s more of a– I’m a book doctor, not a blood doctor. More acid burn than anything else. All right, well the light’s on it. Blood free flowing?
No. Are the lights on?
Not yet. The lights are on.
The lights are on at least. That’s really good, because the shadow people, they don’t like the light. They can’t stand in it–
Doctor, shut it! Thank you, thank you, sorry. All right, what the fuck are we going to do? I don’t know.
Yeah, what’s the plan here? I don’t know how long that is going to last, so I’d recommend we move quickly. We’re just going to get out of here, right? Yeah.
We’ve got to I’m just saying– I don’t care about this casket anymore. I’m sorry, Captain. What rooms have we not been in? The Byzantine court, but we can’t stay here, surely. How about the fuckin’ exit? You gotta know when to cut and run. You don’t– Look, I’ve got debts across Europe, but– All right–
It’s not worth dyin’ over. What are you not telling us?
You don’t want to do this. Will you just fucking tell us already? You don’t cross Mr. Maryweather, we need to deliver this item to him.
Why? Captain, are you frightened of him? He can’t do anything worse to us than what. Look, did you see what happened to her? There were people! God, I’m brilliant.
Coming from– (laughing)
The shadow people, with their claws! What if it’s in the other room? We could make our escape, we get out of this, we never speak it of it again. Would you like to do it by yourself? I might have to.
I’m leaving. I’m comin’ with you. Which exit are you heading for? Fuck.
Is there more than one? There’s the guard post, there’s technically the front entrance to the building, you could, in theory, go to the, although the lights are off out there. The lights are off everywhere else. There is just the place that you entered into. If we get the casket can we stop this? Yes.
Are you kiddin’ me? There aren’t lights anywhere else, and I don’t know if I can them on there. We just fuckin’ make a run for it. We tried that last time. I don’t think there’s any getting out of here. Could you try to enjoy this a little less. (laughing) Perfect grin. That’s fair. I’ll drink to that.
(laughing) Are there any other rooms we haven’t gone in, besides Byzantine.
The Byzantine room. There are? Besides Byzantine? Let me get the map.
The Nineveh? The Nineveh room.
They’re on it rather large. What is it?
The Nineveh room. Yeah, bring it back, yep.
I just need to unfold it. I should also mention, there is an entire bazar, there are a bunch of rooms behind the Egyptian exhibit. There’s a lot you haven’t seen. What’s the Alhamora courts?
Alhambra. We’re all the way back here.
Alhambra. Alhambra courts.
Far left. The Alhambra courts are behind the Egyptian exhibit as well. We’re right here, right?
Yeah. Doctor, do you have any, do you remember seeing anything about the planchette in your papers? When this stops, do the lights stop? Only one way to find out.
Yeah, let’s not wait. Could you hand me the mirror? We can use it to navigate around these corners. We’ll be fine for now, right? The lights are on, so if we move quickly. But the last time the lights didn’t last. And we don’t know how long the power is gonna last in that, so we might as well move while we can. Look, I know this doesn’t seem well-advised, but should we split up?
No, no please don’t. We have covered such little ground. I actually agree.
well– No, we can’t go randomly, we don’t have time– We don’t have time! There are people out to get us. Why don’t we start with the medieval court and the Byzantine court? They’re right next to each other. We can just pop in the rooms and we’ll be within earshot if anything goes wrong. Can I make an intelligence roll? You’ve done the medieval court, technically. Fuck, we’ve done the medieval court. Byzantine, you have not done yet, though. We can’t done Byzantine and what else? Byzantine, the bazar, the Cat Show, or anything behind the Egyptian exhibit. Oh, the fucking Cat Show.
The fucking Cat Show. Can I do an intelligence roll to try to remember in my– Could he have had the planchette in the papers? Paperwork. If there was anything, any clues in the paperwork that tied to the things on the map that would give us a clue about where would be. There isn’t. Actually, you know what? I’ll give you an intelligence at difficulty. Okay. So, we have two chances at this, clearly. Come on, Doctor.
Fuck. No.
We need to just start going. It would’ve been quite a leap of logic to figure out where things were going. We need to just start moving, because I’m pretty sure since we only have two of these that’s as much time as we have. I’ll walk out to the middle area and just poke the mirror around and sort of look around.
Fine. Let’s run.
Can I look in the mirror? Yes, you should. You’re there. Something about the way that the mirror reflects makes you look weirdly gaunt. Ooh. Can I stop looking at the mirror? Yep, now you can. Okay, Byzantine court. You’ll probably wanna check again in a minute.
It’s clear, let’s go. Byzantine court! Let’s run to the Byzantine court. To the Byzantine court.
How are you doing, darling? Oh, yeah, that’s the closer one. Mm-hmm, that’s one of the ones right next to you. (humming) It’s like the end of “Clue”. You arrive at the Byzantine court. I rip off a bottom piece of my dress, just the bottom lining and I kind of– Patch her up. Very quickly patch her up.
Do you wanna try and make a medicine check to see if you can heal her a little bit?
Sure. While they’re doing that can I look around for anything? You can. I will actually give a description of the Byzantine court, since we’re going in here. Currently, the exhibit is also waiting to be set up for the show, because it’s just a–
that did not go well– Giant mess.
Sorry. It is more, more crates. Traditionally, there’s a wonderful, huge tent that is set up made of silk and velvet, and this wonderful, but the whole thing is kind of leaning to the side in a giant mess right now because somebody knocked it down when they were moving all these crates into here for the new exhibit. There are a couple interesting arcade machines around the side in the traditional sense. There’s some hand-crank novelty machines, including, roll a, let’s do some perception. Do an intelligence roll.
Oh, I shouldn’t have done this on my character sheet. You can scoot it forward and it should be fine. Big success.
It’ll keep running, it’s gonna be fine for a little while. I failed the first aid check. Okay, no better.
Extreme success. Extreme success from me as well. Extreme success.
Looking around, thank you. I’m sorry, I’m not a doctor. There might be someone in the room. There might be someone in the room? You think you see a person in the back. Hey, Badger.
Yeah? You wanna hold that mirror up and take a look around in here? (whooshing) There appears to be a man at a desk and he is not moving. There’s a man at the desk, he is not moving. Is there anything interesting in here that we should give a shit about, or should we just leave?
Bunch of crates. Is the man at the desk facing us or facing away? The desk is actually, you have him in profile, he’s just sitting at a desk, and he is not moving, he is just sitting at a desk. All right.
Can you watch him– You’re not close enough–
And everyone else– You’re not close enough to really see. I will take a lantern and I will. Oh no, it’s light–
It’s light. It’s lit.
Oh. You’re lit. The lights are on, see? He’s not a shadow person? I mean, he’s not in a shadow, but he’s hard to see, ’cause he’s a little far away ’cause he’s behind some crates, but– You! You there!
Don’t talk to him! Go through these crates, see if there’s anything in there. Oh no, he’s not responding? He’s not moved, he’s not responded. All right, so we stay away. While they do that, I wanna check the labels. All right, do that.
Yeah. Do the roll.
I will stay on this fucker. Fuck me. What was I? It’s a standard intelligence check. I need to push more luck. Okay. I’ll say that, yeah, you kinda lost count, you’re gonna have to start again. You’re really distracted. Some of the crates you can’t get to without getting closer to the guy. I’ll get closer to the guy. I think this might be slowing down. We’ve got the lights on. It’s still rolling. Yes, I’ll go with you, I’ll take the sword cane out– But it is slowing down, you’re right. I’m gonna start tearing through the cabinets looking for that planchette while they do that. Go, do what you need to, Doctor, I’ll have him. Yeah. You can do a spot hidden. It’s not a man. It’s an automaton, he’s only half a person sitting at a desk with a writing pen. Fuck.
Oh my god, that’s even worse. It says, “The Future Scribe, the automatic man “who sees the future, on loan from the estate of “Sir Joseph Paxton,” there is a slot for a coin. Oh, we’ve got the fucking coin! That was a placeholder, there wasn’t– You do actually, you all have pocket change. Still–
We have pocket change. So, if you wanted to attempt to roll it. Put it in, why not.
Yes. Ms. O’Neill, we might need to go back to the– Is there anything written on the desk? Arcade soon.
He has pen and paper, and he pulls the paper to write, obviously. Oh, but nothing’s written yet? But nothing’s written yet. One more pitch to run for the fuckin’ front door. Just hang on.
The lights are on. Success on a spot hidden. There is no jade. Any more of the–
Casket? Or the red iris stones?
Nothing you see in here. Is the automaton writing something on the desk, any sort of a–
I put in a coin. (buzzing) Fuck’s sake.
Machines are so creepy. (dinging) You ever seen anything like this? What does it say?
No. Biff Tannen is president. I haven’t seen anything like any of this tonight. (laughing)
Here you go. What’s your real name, anyway?
Archie. God.
Mr. Maryweather– We’ve got to get back, back to the future. Two years ago.
(laughing) The ground directly beneath the lamp is always darkest. The ground, oh, right. Right.
Right. Okay. Hold it sideways. There’s also always more coins, I’m just saying. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I was thinkin’ about, flick it in!
Is it dripping? Roll a percentile dice.
Yeah, probably. Which one? (yells)
Oh, fuck. (whooshing) Just the first one?
Yeah. 50.
Okay, cool. ♪ This girl is on fire. ♪ (buzzing) (dinging) Come on, you sack of shit. Grant me my wish, make me big. (laughing) Truth depends on the color of the crystal through which one sees it. Fuck! They’re all red!
Riddles, riddles. Truth depends on the color. All right, I’ll try my luck.
Are the lights flickering? (buzzing)
Still rollin’. Green, red, black.
(dinging) True crystals.
There are so many. Roll a percentile.
Green, red, black. Lights are fucking flickering, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god. 30.
It stopped! Lanterns up!
(lanterns clanking) The lights go out again with a slow fade. Fuck.
Mirrors are liars, they show us only what we expect to see. I call bullshit on that one based on our experiences. Is there an optimal way to hold these so that we aren’t in the shadow ever? You can attempt it and we’ll see what happens, but you’re holding on pretty well at the moment. Hey, engineer, you got one of those crystals on ya? It doesn’t matter, ’cause that’s back at the– [Marisha And Ashly] We have to go back. All of ’em are back there? No, the machine is back there. Yeah, that’s not–
Can we use this to act as a channel for some of the lantern light? You flipping that around like that– Go through it.
Are you going to try that? Yeah, like as a, you know, you hit the sun and you can make it dance and shit. You can try.
Can you hold it, and does it make a spot move on the ground? It’s hard to tell.
Okay. Not a lot of light out of these things. Does anybody have one of the crystals on ’em? Can I look in the mirror again? Yeah, we have one.
But we have to go back to the arcade to use it. Do you have a sense of whether or not, are these all single-use items, these crystals? Do I?
Maybe we can meditate again. They require, you would remember they required days to recharge. They usually need a lunar month. Okay, so, we have about that length of time one more crystal, and we need to search how many rooms? Three. Or we need to get to an exit. Or we need to get to an exit. If one of you feels so encouraged as to venture outside, please, be my guest. What was your percentile, by the way, when you rolled one and got your fortune? 30.
30? Okay, that’s fine. Here’s what I think we need to do. I think we need to go back to the machine arcade, I think we need to turn the lights back on and I think we need to– [Ashly And Travis] Split up. Right.
Yes. All right.
Move, now. Who’s going where? How many teams?
Lights on first. Yes.
Captain? Yes.
Are you saying that if we don’t find the casket, it won’t even be safe to leave? If I hadn’t seen that man’s reflection disappear in the window I would’ve said that outside seems like a viable option. In the real world, I wouldn’t disappoint Mr. Maryweather, but given what I saw, I wouldn’t go out there. (knocking)
(gasping) Come back with a warrant!
(laughing) That knocking, that, that’s the sound that happened before the shadow people, and the– Doctor, calm down.
Thank you. Give me that stone, give it to me. Let’s move. As you leave the room… That’s not helping at all.
(laughing) Boosh! I’ve been waiting to say this my entire life, you’re just an asshole with a ruby on his eye. (laughing) Bless ya and keep ya. Make a spot hidden check, anybody who’s got a decent spot hidden check as you’re leaving the room. I have a fair–
I only got 45, who’s got better?
What’s decent in Call of Cthulhu?
45. Wait, what are we rolling? What are we rolling?
Super fucking bad. Spot hidden, I suppose.
Yeah, spot hidden. 50, how’d you do?
79. Terrible.
Didn’t do it. Double-oh five. Oh. You really see stuff.
Yeah. So, as– You see through space and time. As we’re leaving… As you’re leaving the room, the crystal divider, the glass divider that leads out of this room, the light catches on the glass in just an interesting way that you see something in the reflection. As you’re staring into the reflection cast by the light, you see things that I have on lists that are not there. There we go. You see… the lantern that is being held, but it’s not being held by the person. It’s not being held by Hana, it’s being held by Joseph Wayland, it’s being held by the security officer. And he’s staring at you through the glass. And he’s tapping on the glass. From the outside? It’s a divider.
In the reflection? It’s a divider from one room to the other. Made of glass, and– So I see him in a glass world, through a glass, darkly?
Ooh, nice. And he has been tapping on the glass, and he’s nodding, no. He looks concerned. He doesn’t look well at all. Does he look gaunt?
No. Okay.
Just translucent. He’s concerned. Make a sanity roll. Oh no. We are dying in the building. 10 and two.
Oh, 10 and two? Steady, steady, steady lad. Extremely sane. Keep moving. I tell them what I aw. If you look back, anybody who looks back sees him reflected in the glass in the light. Holding up a lantern?
Holding up your lantern, almost as your reflection. That’s exactly what he was doing– Oh, just hers?
When we went and looked for him.
Everybody else shows up? Everybody else is there?
Why? What do you mean, that’s what he was doing? He was staring into the window holding up the lantern, he didn’t turn around and look at us, though. He’s tapping on the window a bit more. (tapping)
Let’s get out of here. And he’s pointing.
Pointing where? Which direction?
Let’s get out of here. He’s pointing you towards the machine arcade. He looks concerned. Wait, he’s like nodding, like go that way, or like, fuck that?
He’s doing this. You can interpret it as you like. Where’s the fucking machine arcade? You know where it is.
It’s– The, where we’re–
‘Cause we’re in the– Byzantine court.
Just around the corner. On the other side–
It’s not a long walk, so the stealth roll is not gonna be as difficult as it could be. Oh my god.
All right, let’s go. Yes, let’s go.
Doesn’t want us to go back. All right. Head back to the machine arcade. Mm-hmm.
Yes. I go–
Make a stealth roll, really quickly all of you.
Fucking dammit. The shadow people will be waiting for us there– Yes.
No. They. Okay, yeah, 19. Success.
No, no, no, yes, yes, yes? That’ll do it, you make it back. Ms. O’Neill, the second one, please. Time will be of the essence. Hana. Crystal me, somebody. Archie.
This is awkward. Here you go.
Christ. (groaning) (laughing)
Who are you? Is there anything can do, fight? Run? Be prey? Did you bring anything to drink? I need concentration, or something like that. Just start–
We’ll discuss this later. We should discuss what, who’s going where. (sighs) No, we should, yes, yes. Oh, okay.
Right. While they do that, I focus. What are the three remaining areas? The Cat Show–
And while we do that, can we place the lamps on the ground? Roll your POW.
Pow, pow, pow. Think we should do the exact same thing that we did last time. Okay, we do the exact same thing. Just hold above our heads, cone. Exactly 70.
All right. This is not difficult.
Exactly my level. Yeah.
And you’ve got luck. Yeah.
Burn a luck and you’ll be fine.
I will spend one luck. This is not a hard thing to roll. Okay. So, two of us can go in each room. Yeah. I call not Archie, and I’ll go to– Nobody knows the value of a good red shirt anymore. (laughing) He can stick with me. So, what’s left? Nineveh court? Sure, big man.
Nineveh and the bazar. And behind the Egyptians, but yeah. And behind the Egyptians? I mean, there’s just a bunch of rooms back there, it’s not really–
that’s where we saw the spooky people, right? Was actually against the wall, yes. But they were in the Egyptian court, not the– Not the rooms behind.
Kind of stuffed behind it. You don’t happen to be a fan of cats, are you? You know what’s weird? We’ve seen no cats this whole time. They’re in cages.
Never had a cat in my life. It’s funny though, paid off the judges. Ms. O’Neill. Do you wanna do the honor, or? Did you activate it?
Oh, yes. You can activate it over there if you wanna really milk every moment of this. Yes, I do. Did you say, paid off the judges? Why’d you think I made that bet? (laughing)
Just layin’ it out there. Who is the Golden Dawn to you? Just push. There it is.
The Golden Dawn? To me?
Yeah. Why, I know them. Bunch of fuckin’–
there’re quite a lot of– Go, go, go, go, go, go.
There you go. Okay.
Bunch of fucking drifters who wish to–
Ms. O’Neill, would you like to join me in the court, behind the Egyptian court? As soon as this gets going. How do you know who the Golden drifters, or the Golden Dawn?
The Golden Dawn. He’s very–
we’ll give them a moment while she gets it rolling. The power begins to slowly turn back on. They’re very trendy, very popular in the salons, lot of very prominent members. Sure.
Occultists. Showmen.
Yes. Showmen.
Yes. Let’s be fair. Good ones, at that.
Have a little more, little more.
Why? Is Mr. Maryweather one of them? No, he has a small dossier on people of interest and our resident–
Power’s on. Fakery over here–
Let’s go. Not in very good favor with the Golden Dawn. Yes, light, let’s hurry. It’s rollin’, it’ll take a minute to get going but I’m gonna give you this one while you get it going anyway. I’m just very good at what I do. You and me to the court behind the Egyptian court? Deal.
You two to Nineveh, I guess. Captain. And you two? We’re going to the court behind. Someone needs to go to the Cat Show, the other person needs to go to Nineveh. Cat show? Cat Show’s in Nineveh. Fuckin’ love cats, let’s go. You two?
All right. Yeah.
Nineveh? Wait–
They’re in the same place? Nineveh’s the Cat Show.
Where’s the bazar? The bazar is all those tables in there that you actually haven’t taken a look at, all those little booths. Is that a room that we’re counting that we haven’t been to?
Mm-hmm. And then behind–
(exhaling) Push down.
And then behind the– I was pushing it.
Come on, come on. The hall of justice, so to speak. Okay. We’re heading to the hall of justice in Alhambra. And we’ll go to Nineveh court. And then that leaves you two to the bazar. We’re going to the Cat Show. You come on, now.
The Cat Show is in Nineveh? Then we’ll go to the bazar. If it helps, take it out of the bag. If it’s really being difficult you can take it out of the bag. Take it out of the bag.
Oh, is it goin’? There it is.
Take it out of the bag, you get more heat.
That’s it. Take it out of the bag. We’re goin’, okay.
Got to unbag it. Catch up.
Break. You’re good, you’re on. It’s rollin’. Seems slower than the last one. Oh god, it’s already.
Run! Let’s go.
Let’s go. So, wait, we’re going to the bazar? Yes.
Okay. We’ll go to the bazar.
All right. We go to the court behind the Egyptian court. Can I get the number? Can I jot down the number of the crate from Dr. Pocket? From his paper?
If you have a second you can take a second to write them down. Just quickly copy the code. So yeah, you’re looking for one particular code that you’re looking for, so you got it, yeah. Okay, let’s go. What’s the roll that we should do to look for things.
Do an intelligence roll. Intelligence roll.
God dammit, I failed. Success. None of these crates are the ones you’re looking for. Fuck. Okay, out to the court, the bazar. I’m gonna quickly look around. These are not the crates you’re looking for. Do I see, once again, any planchette, any artifacts? In the hall of justice?
Yeah. No.
No? Okay.
Nothing. It’s just crates. There’s not even objects back here, it’s just a big pile of crates. Bastard’s probably hidden in one of these but we don’t have time. Let’s go.
Okay. And then the other place is the bazar. The bazar and the Cat Show. We’re in the Cat Show.
We’re in the bazar. Let’s head to the bazar and we’ll meet in the middle. Should we go through the Cat Show? Sure, yes.
Yes? Right.
Do we roll a lucky thing? You enter the Cat Show.
Cat hall. It’s interesting. There are… hundreds of cages with cats. Oh, great.
Almost… two perfect lined walls of cats in cages waiting to be, with tags with their names and owners. They haven’t quite been set up, and they’re not all there yet, but there’s quite a few of them. They’re all quiet, and they’re all staring at you. Yes, that’s unsettling.
Mangy creatures. Who’s in there?
It’s– It’s the two of us. You notice at the very, very back of the exhibit, there are some antiquities back there. At the back? Let’s go, Harry. Yeah, all right. Let’s forward. Let’s find this fucking thing so we can get out of here. It is not hard to see– It was in the Cat Show. But there is, in fact, a casket. Yes.
Why didn’t we go to the fucking cat room first.
On a pedestal– Cat Show. In the far corner. Always the last place you look. Of course.
On a pedestal on a table? It is not on a pedestal on the table, it is in a glass case that is locked. Cool.
At this point– Any objections? I’ll have a go at the lock. The lock?
(laughing) I just take my cane and. (whooshing) Do you?
Smash that fucking thing. You smash the glass?
Yeah. Roll to smash the glass.
That was loud. Strength? Yes, that would be a strength roll. Better than survival or occult. Four.
(laughs) Yeah. The glass shatters, and as the glass shatters, there’s an accompanying sound of an unearthly shriek. (shrieking) The casket bursts open, and… the body of a mummified cat dissolves instantly. The dust pours out… and makes its way behind you down the row of cats that all breathe it in and start going insane. The cats are clawing at their cages trying to get out, the sound is deafening. Roll a sanity check.
Both of us, right? Yeah. Ya great stuttering prick, ya. 10.
Yes. How’d you do?
what do I roll? Four. You guys are fine.
No, no. No?
64. Oh, 64?
Oh. So, I have to go lower than what now? Your sanity, which is a 40. 40? So, I have to beat the sanity number? And you did not.
You do, and you did not. Oh, no.
Roll a D4. All right, here we go. Four. You run. You take five points of sanity, and your immediate compulsion is to get the fuck outta there. The fuck are you going? Now. (laughs) Now it is. So, the casket’s open?
Mm-hmm. What was it?
14. Can I shut the lid?
You can. Can I grab that damn thing?
You can. And I’ll start trying to carry it and limp my happy ass back through the hall of insane looking kitties. They are beating at their cages. They are… mad. These cats, something has gotten into them and they are feral, vicious beasts. They are pounding themselves against the cages in attempt to get out, just ripping at them like wild animals, biting at the metal to try and claw their way out. Tell them I found it. Tell them I found it! Archie’s going for the front door. Couple of them are starting to actually tear their way through the cages. Oh no.
They do not look okay. (yelling) Meanwhile. Meanwhile? We were heading back that direction. Because there’s a meanwhile– Did we hear?
I’ll let you get a little more heat out of that before it goes. Well, now, it’s still going, it’s still going. Did we hear the screeching? Not yet, it hasn’t happened yet. You’re in the arcade still.
Okay. These guys haven’t gone yet?
Mm-hmm. Super cool. The bazar.
So, we go to the bazar. Do we see any crates?
There are no crates. The bazar is just a series of beautiful booths, like a dealer’s room of antiquities and strangeness. There’s everything from taxidermy, carpets, bones, skulls, Egyptian artifacts. Do we see any jade? There is, in fact, a booth that sells a lot of jade… cups, jade statues, et cetera, et cetera. You can dig through if you like. Yeah–
Jade cups? Wanna look through the green glass– Yes.
At the things at that booth to see if there’s anything that I recognize from my readings and my research. I’ll look and see if there’s anything that matches her description. Do a spot hidden, do an occult. Or an antiquities. Bummer. How does pushing work? If you push this, if you fail again, it’s going to be bad. But yeah, you spend luck and if you push it again it’s– Hard success.
Hard success? All right.
There is an object. A very odd object there. (yelling)
What the fuck. That’s it. That’s what Alexandra was talking about. And you’re meant to look through it. Uh-huh, uh-huh! Oh. What do you see?
Yes, what happens? Nothing. It’s a planchette, you have to use it. Anyway.
Numbers on it. Yeah, can you– You have to know how to use a planchette. So–
Well, fuck. Moving on to, you’ve got your success. Okay.
you do hear (screeching) and you hear the insanity happening at the other end. Oh my god, it’s cats. So we head that way? You’re gonna head towards the cats? All right. I’ve always found cats to be very uncanny. Since you two just did your thing, you do also hear the screech. Shall we head that way? Are they in Nineveh?
I think we shall. Mm-hmm. Everybody is in Nineveh if that’s where the Cat Show is. When you arrive, you see Septimus– I’m not going in.
Or, are we Archie now? Sure, Archie, yeah.
Running bloody hell– The lights are off.
And the lights go off just as you leave the room. Fuck.
Fuck. All right. Remain calm, all is well. Are we all here together?
I’ve got it! What?
I’ve got it! So have we, so have we!
The cats are going crazy. And we’ve got the planchette. We run towards–
I don’t know what it is but I’ve got it. You guys are gonna run toward? We hear him running, so run. We’re running towards where? Where did you run towards? I was gonna book for the front entrance. Make a dexterity check at disadvantage. Oh no!
At disadvantage, okay. I fail, but I can push it, right? You can push it.
You can use luck. So I’m going to, yeah, I’m gonna use luck and get it just under, because– So, that would take four luck. Yeah, I will do that. Where is it? Okay. So far nothing terrible. You’re gonna make your way towards the door that you came from, is that where you’re running towards? We came in over there, didn’t we? Mm-hmm.
No, I’m going for that. You’re going for that one?
Yeah. The entrance.
Okay. It’s closer.
Sure. It’s the one I’m closest to. Yeah, yeah, ’cause you’re right there. As you run towards the entrance, the lights go out. Am I still running without a lantern in my hand? Do you have a lantern?
I thought I did. I mean, you have one right there. You have one right there.
That’s a lantern. You do have a lantern.
So, Travis is in complete darkness, I’m sorry– As you get to the window–
Oh, my god. Badger is.
Right. Badger is in darkness.
There are four people in– ‘Cause each team had– Elizabethan clothing, I suppose. Nope, that’s my, I hate those. And they’re all standing at the window looking at you and they’re all tapping– On the outside or the inside? The reflections would be of people on the inside if they were there, but it’s just the reflections. Are there benches or anything around here by the door? Are there benches? There are no benches by the door. There’s nothing that could be picked up? Anything?
By the entrance? Yeah.
Potted plant. You could go into the bathroom and maybe get lucky or you could go back to the bazar– Are they doing this on the glass? To maybe find something, or you could just make a push for it. A push for it to what?
You could try… I mean, you could try and run towards the door, but it is, I will admit, by the entrance door– Yeah? It’s pretty dark, you only have that. And they’re on the other side of that glass? They are on the other side of that glass and there’s a big stripe of metal beam that you’d have to jump through. Okay, so, Archie runs towards it like he’s going to smash himself through and wusses out and stops, and just stares at them, gobsmacked for a minute.
(tapping) And then starts to run back towards the fuckin’ others. All right, make a… Make another dexterity at difficulty. Difficulty. Dexterity, under 60. I succeed. Slippery bastard.
Slippery bastard. Slippery motherfucker. You’re back with the group. I give the planchette to Ms. O’Neill. Holy–
Alexandra– What is that noise?
What is it? What happened? Doc, Engineer, you got a plan, right? Where’s Badger?
You gotta have a plan. Badger?
He’s here, right? Captain?
I put my light around. Did I make it out of the Cat Show? You did make out of the Cat Show. (breathing heavily) I got the casket. Badger!
I have it. The darkness–
Fuck. Seems to be spreading. Little tendrils start grasping out… of the points and places around the beams everywhere the shadows are cast. It starts reaching out for you. It’s trying to trap you in. Lights, lights toward Badger! We form the–
Back to back to back. The pyramid again?
Back to back. Yeah.
You don’t suppose– Are you gonna do back to back to back? Aye.
Around Badger. Around Badger in the center. Okay. Do you see that? In the shadows that are being cast by yourselves around you, there are now seven people with their back turned just outside of your view that are shuffling slowly around you at the edge of the darkness. The shadows, we’re making shadows. What do we do?
Give me– How do we not make shadows? Give me that crystal that we burned through. It’s not here, it’s not here. That one–
Oh, the other one. That we threw out the. Yeah. I take it and put it in front of the planchette and try to hold it up to the light. Anything? No, but sadly, I will say, the shadow that you’re currently casting with the planchette, two shadow hands burst out of it towards your face and try and pull you towards it. Alexandra!
Holy shit. Make a strength check. I shove the lantern.
O’Neill. I’m going to spend luck to succeed. Seven points. You do succeed. Well, that’s the thing, it’s actually a contested roll. Okay.
Oh. Okay. What did you roll with your luck that you spent? 66. Oh, with the luck that I spent? Yeah, with the luck–
59. You manage to pull the planchette hard enough that the hands let go, they do, on the other hand, knock that lantern down and it shatters. You’re one down.
Big loss. Get it off the table.
A big loss. Take it away.
That’s a big loss. I hold the planchette, I kind of angle it, not to get anywhere near my partners, hold it up in front of this thing. Front of the black mirror.
Nothing. The black mirror that we shattered, I think this is what this was for! You now the technical use of a planchette? No! To hold it over a thing and find shit out and there was writing in script on that big mirror thing. There was.
Yeah. Are we just fucked? We might’ve fucking killed ourselves. I think we’re fucked. What about the casket? What’s the casket–
We have it. Is there anything on it? Why don’t we go to the entrance? I don’t know, is there anything on the casket that– There is a lot of hieroglyphs on that casket. There’s symbols, and–
put it on the casket! (groaning)
Shadows are creeping. I put the planchette over the casket. It’s acting oddly, but nothing helpful. It’s just sort of giving you a series of weird swirls. Dump out that glass that we shattered. Just dump it on the floor. Anything lighting up?
Okay. It puts the planchette over the casket or else it gets the hose. What do we see? What does she see? It’s sparkling and doing weird stuff, but nothing, you’re not getting anything out of it. Nothing?
And what about. I think we have to run to the Egyptian room. Wait!
The Egyptian room, why? Where the rest of the glass is. Why don’t we go for the exit? Well, front door’s not exactly an inviting option. Well, they’re not grabbing at us. You can’t confuse the mirror people with the shadow people. The shadow people are trying to kill us. Doc, please! Yeah, are you fuckin’ listening to yourself right now? What about all three of them together? Nothing?
Well, no. Oh, god dammit. What did I do? You just passed that across from that right in front of her. Another hand reaches out for you, make a dex save. Yeah, we have to be mindful. That’s right, ’cause she’s got the– Pass.
What’d you roll? 62. It reached and grabs just a lock of your hair and reels it back into the planchette. Into the planchette? That’s where the shadow came from. (screaming)
I yank the planchette out of the way like I did before. Mm-hmm.
(muffled) Did it work, okay?
It’s fine. All right, okay.
We need to move, yes? The glass sparkled, right? The glass sparkled? Let’s go to the Egyptian room. The Egyptian room! Let’s go to the Egyptian room. Everyone roll a stealth check. Fuck.
We’re surrounded. Yeah, we’re fucking runnin’. Pass.
Are you guys running? Yes.
Yeah. Stealth check at disadvantage. Well, I already failed. Still passed. Pass, fail, fail, fail, fail– Oh, none of it fuckin’ matters. Fail. We’re all gonna die.
Probably gonna die. (laughing)
As you’re running– (humming)
As fast as possible to the Egyptian room, the shadows are crawling, and the shadows are making their way out of the beams on the floor into little veins as they crawl and claw their way into this world. There’s something about you they really don’t like. I get that a lot.
As you are running by and you cross into one of the beams of shadow, two backwards men run full speed to tackle you– (laughing)
Oh, fuck. Through a beam of shadow. Make a dex save at disadvantage. Make a dex save at disadvantage. I already failed.
It’s a fail? Yeah.
Yeah. Do you wanna try and push, or? I mean, at this point I might as well, right? Yeah. Come on, baby, come on.
Get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it, get it. I passed. As you’re running by, so this is pushed luck. They make a push and they grab, and they manage to claw into you, but they don’t grab you. You do take some damage though– Of course.
From their roll by. As you get bitten, as they roll by backwards with the back of their head as you see them roll towards you, and they make their pass, almost as if a mouth just grows on the back of their head but they get a good– Oh, get the fuck out.
(screaming) Bite out of you.
Ida. You only take three damage, well done. It burns like acid. And they get that good (snarling) and then it just vanishes back into the shadow. You guys gonna keep running? Yes.
Yes. Yes.
And also feverishly looking for anything metal that can be picked up. Heavy–
Not where you’re going. But not too heavy. All right. There’s only one place you’re gonna find anything. You’re back at the Egyptian room. Why are we running?
How big is the planchette– That big. Because there’s shit everywhere. Compared to the black disk. The shadows move as fast as we do. It’s about 1/5 the size.
There’s no point running. It’s like a– It 100% had to have been useful. What do we do now? There’s shards of glass on the ground still. Do we try and puzzle–
No? You can roll it over. It is giving a sparkle but it’s not– It needed to be together.
We killed it. Maybe we get out– Do we have to go behind the statue where those people were?
We can try it. You look behind the statue, there are now three people behind the statue. Yeah, we don’t go back there. We get the fuck out of here. The lanterns that you have are currently keeping them at bay, but just barely and they are trying to edge ever closer to you. They are walking as close as they can with every shadow that gives them foothold. Okay, let’s try and make our way back to where– The royal apartment?
Yeah, Mr. Maryweather– Were there any stone statues or anything in here? Said he was gonna meet us.
There’s one really, really, there’s actually two–
So, just went in the wrong direction.
Really, really big ones and about four tiny medium ones. Is there anything that can be hoisted in one hand? No.
For what? For fighting. You’re gonna hit the shadows? You got a better plan?
He’s going to try and break his way out.
Yes. We move slowly, keeping the light as concentrated as we can, and move to the royal apartments. Take it under consideration. Let’s get the fuck out of here. He’s right, let’s try slowly. Okay, we do what we can. You’re gonna move slowly? Stealth at disadvantage.
Dammit. No. No! Yes. Super success.
Yes. Yes.
Success? Super, extreme success.
Fail, fail, fail. Three success three fail.
Super success. Man.
what’d you get? 17.
Oh no. As you’re walking by again, as you’re walking out of the Egyptian room towards the bazar there’s just no way to make it, there’s just no, it’s almost a labyrinth, there’s just no way to walk– Without–
Through this place without crossing a shadow, it is to crystalline, there’s too many hard angles, and it’s finding nooks and crannies everywhere to gain purchase. A backwards woman in a… almost silk black robe… makes a run at you, hands forward to try and grab. You can try and dex out of it, or you can try and strength out of it at disadvantage. Actually, strength out of it disadvantage. That’s that you’ve decided? I think she got you. They went for the push last time, I think she’s making a grab. You can try and get away but she’s really goin’. So, strength at disadvantage. Mm-hmm. Pull away before she gets a bite of you. Nice knowing you guys.
You got this, you got this, you got this. I failed. Luck it, luck it. Push it.
You can. Do you think I should just spend the luck? Well, I didn’t roll this one, I’m sorry. Oh, I really fucked it up. I have to push. (humming) At disadvantage, right?
Mm-hmm. Oh, god. Oh my god, can I spend seven luck? Can you do that on a push?
Oh, I don’t know. You know what, I don’t know if you can do that on a push. Fair enough.
You had one or the other. He’s got blood in his eye. Oh my god.
Dramatic consequence. You get grabbed by this strange old backwards woman. I’m also holding a lantern, everyone. She takes a big bite outta you, right out of your shoulder–
The back of her head? From the back of her head, and yanks you… really, really hard right towards the fountain, which is currently in shadow, and you get pulled, bleeding from the shoulder, right into the shadows of the fountain where there should be a splash, but instead there’s just nothing. What do you mean, nothing?
No sound? Void.
No sound, no nothing. Don’t leave the table, though, but. Ida’s just gone.
Lantern’s gone? Ida’s gone, the lantern went with her. Lantern’s gone.
Oh my god. It hit the shadow and died. I’d say it’s been fun but I’d be lying. You guys are really fucked now. You dick.
(laughing) All right.
Oh god. What are you gonna do? Oh god.
Okay. Are you stopping or are you running? Go, we go.
For the exit? Or do we just run through a window– For the apartments! The royal apartments. Mr. Maryweather. Are we talking about it or doing it? We’re doing it.
We’re doing it. Roll a stealth run, disadvantage. Jesus, why am I following you people? (laughing) May light and knowledge prevail. Fuck, it’s a disadvantage, stealth at disadvantage? Yeah, stealth at disadvantage. Fuck.
At disadvantage? Actually, I’m so sorry, not disadvantage. Roll one more time, it’s stealth at difficulty. I’m so sorry.
What’s difficulty mean? Oh, I have to roll again.
Means you have to roll at least half of it.
Same, I’m good. I’m so sorry.
Fuck. 25 or less. Good?
Yeah, 14. Good. Oh, two, three bad little children. Two successes three fails. (laughing)
Naughty little children. Dr. Mason. As you are running through the bazar, one of them, as you run through the bazar and you’re going through, you’re passing one of the booths in the bazar that sells just nice housewares. And as you look in the mirror, furniture and the like, you see something in the mirror that catches your eye. You see Ida holding the lantern, tapping. (tapping) You can’t speak, but at the very least, she seems like she’s cheering you on towards the exit. You are currently finding yourself behind the glass in this weird “Alice in Wonderland” twisted version of the Crystal Palace, where when the darkness hits, just the very reality that you are stuck in twists and vanishes into some other strange Byzantine universe, but as long as there is light you can see it pour through the reflective surfaces in the world you are, and you can see your friends running for the exit. And you can follow them if you like in the reflections, and they can hear your tapping. And you can, yeah?
Is it me? It is you. I guess I’ll follow them then. Help us. You can also see that there are tons of these creatures descending upon this building, and there are a lot of other people in the glass along with you, you are not alone. Told you to go for the entrance. They’re mirror people, not shadows. Devil man, where on this map are we right now? There? Should we just go for the exit? You do find a poker, you do find, I know what you’re looking for. I do like a good poker.
Grab a fire poker for your trouble, good man.
To break the glass. Fire poker for your troubles. Should we just bust through the entrance? Fuck the apartment.
Well– It’s way closer–
all right, let’s– Yes!
You guys are going full speed but you stop to look in the mirror. Right. And suddenly, two hands pull right out from underneath one of the booths, and the shadow that it casts that your feet are on. Can they see me, or just Dr. Pocket? He’s the only one who’s noticed you so far. So, they don’t know to go for the entrance? No. So–
Is that where you are? You need to make a strength check for that disadvantage. I’m urging you to go to the entrance, but only he can see me.
Come on, Doc. Do we see him getting grabbed? Come on, Doc. That’s a good reaction.
Buh-bye. How bad? Can you push? You should push.
Oof. You take seven points of damage as two of them grab out and start to take a chunk out of your leg.
You’re okay, you’re okay, you’re okay, you’re a pretty stealth dude, you’re a pretty set dude.
Doctor. Seven hit points, but you do, you’re bleeding, it’s bad, I also need you to roll a sanity check. (Phil laughs) No?
No. I serve (mumbled). Three points of sanity damage. Were they ever there to begin with? It’s all right. Your hypothesis is correct. The mirror people are here to help you. Oh, shit. You were absolutely right all along, and all of those idiots are gonna feel so, so fucking… embarrassed for ever doubting you. And all you need to do is break the glass to get her back out. He thinks this? After failing his sanity roll. (laughs) Yeah.
Right. After failing his sanity roll, yeah. (laughing) So, are we all moving on?
No, I’m lookin’ around, I’m seeing everything that’s happened, I’ve seen people get grabbed by things that don’t exist, I see this for the lunacy that it is, and I am bolting back towards the front entrance with my poker, and I am going to smash the fucking glass. Make a… I suppose I’m gonna just do a stealth roll extreme disadvantage. Extreme disadvantage, so that means a quarter? Fuck’s sake, where are you going? If you’re not even being careful about that– No, I’m fucking bolting for it.
Be careful about the shadows.
He’s taking a lantern. Okay.
Oh my god! I am. No! So, am I even rolling for stealth or I’m just bookin’ it? It’s just to see if you actually somehow by the grace of God manage to just do it. Okay, so, at disadvantage? Mm-hmm.
Extreme disadvantage. What’d you roll
Extreme disadvantage, well, I failed, ’cause one of those is an 80. Yeah, yeah, that’s bad.
Okay, well, I’ll push I suppose.
Yeah, you will. (laughing)
Come on, bud. Come on, big winners. Archie. That’s a pass, no, extreme disadvantage. Roll at half.
Extreme disadvantage. Can I use–
I don’t think– Can I chisel that down?
No. No, well then that’s a fail. That’s the intense pushed fail. Sure.
Oh, god. You run into a shadow–
go big or go home. You run straight for the fucking door screaming bloody murder. As you run, you run right into the darkness. They hear the clamor of your poker as it hits, and they see your severed head roll out of the shadow– Yes!
(laughing) What! Roll into the next shadow, and it’s gone too. What the fuck? The sounds of hungry, hungry snarls begin to just fill–
Did the lantern go with him? Yeah, yeah–
Oh yeah. The lantern disappeared?
you only have one– All right.
I would really run. I’m running! Go! Run!
(laughing) You’re there? Okay, roll a stealth, just a standard stealth. Stealth at disadvantage against half, the 50%. No.
No? Very no.
No. Where are we going?
Three nos. If you show up on the other side of the glass I’m gonna be like, come on! Without my head.
Without your head. Just one–
Tapping. Where am I?
Hmm? You are deciding whether or not you’re gonna run or whether or not you’re gonna break the glass– Oh, yeah.
That you see her in. Oh yeah, you believe you could get me out. Right. Which glass? The mirror that she appeared in that she was tapping at you at.
Oh, right. I don’t think we even notice he’s gone. No.
No. Yeah, no, I’m gonna try to break the glass. All right. How are you going to break the glass? That’s what I was thinking, I’m like– You gonna punch it, or you gonna pick up something? Whatever you like. You said it’s housewares, right? Yeah.
So there’s gotta be something hard.
There’s tons of things. There was the poker that got pulled, there’s fireplace attachments. There’s a whole bunch of cookingware, there’s just stuff everywhere, there’s a frying pan, there’s a– Try to break it with a frying pan. A bunch of vases. Gonna take it, you gonna throw it or you gonna smash it.
Smash it. You run up to it and you get a good smash at the mirror. Mm-hmm. Make a strength check, easy-peasy. I have very little strength.
Come on, Doc. Advantage, this is a mirror. Oh, yeah, double-oh six. Oh.
There it is. It shatters everywhere, big huge noise. Doesn’t have any effect.
Oh. But now I need you to make a dexterity save at extreme disadvantage, because that lantern, the only one left, is long gone. Right. Dex is 58. Beat the odds. My dexterity’s 50, this is 26. You’re just over–
Half, yeah. Book it, Archie–
Can I luck it? Did you roll disadvantage? No.
Did you roll three die? Oh.
Oh, no. You have to roll a third die. Wait, three–
The same. Yeah, D100, yeah. Yeah, roll that percentile die, the higher– Percentile die one more time, so just the one percentile die. Okay.
Two percentile die. What is it?
40. So, it’s a 40 is what you were, yeah. So, you have to take the higher number. Oh, okay.
Which is great, you still succeeded.
No, ’cause it’s halved. So, you need to get 25, or. How much luck you got? Can you push still or can you not push? You’ve only rolled once, you could push. Okay.
So, roll a disadvantage one more time, all three dice. So wait, do all three?
All three. All three, take the highest number in the 10ths. Buh-bye. Welcome to mirror world. As you stare at the broken mirror and your friend is not back, I think it occurs to you that there is some satisfaction in hypothesis and test and result. (laughing) And if nothing else, you have reminded yourself that you are a good scientist who follows the data. You don’t even feel what happens next, the shadow just… It’s just everywhere. Are you the only three left? Last roll to make it to the door. Oh, god. Disadvantage? You’re still headed to the royal apartment? I don’t even know anymore. Oh!
Did you make it? I’m gonna use luck.
Is it hard success? Or–
Oh wait, it’s gotta be half. Its gotta be half?
It’s gotta be half. No. No, no. How much luck do you have?
A lot. I’m gonna use 20 points of luck. Half?
You can burn it. You can burn it, but your luck if you have it. Half of yourself. Oh, oh, yes! Success.
(laughing) Everyone’s doing well.
I’m also the one with the lantern!
You have the lantern! Oh no. You– Where’s your luck? Get distracted–
It’s so far gone. When you see Archie in a reflection. Oh, I’m so sorry, you don’t see Archie in the reflection, that’s wrong.
‘Cause he has no head. You see Doctor–
wait can I push, I haven’t pushed my luck yet!
You can push if you like. I will push.
Push your luck! I will attempt to push. You don’t have luck to spend, you just have to push. Oh, she does.
You have luck to spend? She’s all the luck.
I do have luck to spend. Do you have enough luck to– Actually yes, I rolled–
Do you have enough luck to succeed?
A 37. And how much would you need? And I need half, so I need 20, so I could spend 18 luck.
All– I spent 20–
Do it. Spend that shit!
Okay. Spend it! Spend it, spend it, spend it, spend! Spend it now. I’m doing it. Okay, okay.
All right. Somehow–
Two. You see Dr. Mason in the reflection in front of you in the wall, and he is pointing at the door, frantically. You are both pointing at the door frantically. Which door?
The door– To the apartments?
To the royal apartments. All right. From behind from a shadow, you are also now being chased… backwards by the back of a head that looks vaguely familiar, as Archie– (laughing)
Just the head? Oh my god.
No, he’s together, but he’s backwards.
Oh. Like, the body’s running forward and the head is backwards.
Head’s on backwards! It’s going. Everything’s odd, and he looks hungry. Push open the doors.
The door bursts open. It is thankfully unlocked.
We all explode out! Light pours from that room, because the lights were not off in that room. Fuckers. I thought the lights were off everywhere. Told you we should’ve got–
Not in the rich people. (laughing) Mr. Maryweather… What on earth has happened–
shut the door, shut the door shut the fucking door!
The shadows! He shuts the door, you are now in a lit room, together. What’s wrong, where is everybody else? Come on.
They’re dead, they’re gone. They’re dead, they’re gone, what are they– Why don’t you tell us? I dump the casket at his feet. Is it opened or closed?
It’s closed. That’s excellent, let’s take a look at it. Don’t!
No! He opens the casket, he has this necklace around his neck that he places upon the casket and gently opens it. He flings it open. Where’s my cat?
Where’s the cat? The cat shot out of it in a horrific scream and dispersed amongst all the other kittens in the fucking show room! It’s still in there, isn’t it? Yes! Along with a bunch of other shadowy people that look gaunt and hungry and were running out of every bit of darkness in every corner of the room! Darkness? Like, what do you mean, darkness? Like shadows.
What happened to you? Shadows with hands.
Why don’t you tell us– There are three of us. We started with six, where do you think the other three are? This is gonna get a little rough, I do apologize. What do you know?
What do you mean, your cat? The lights begin to flicker.
No. (laughs) Oh, god. The room is going dark again. It knows you’re in here. Archie kicks open the door as the lights begin to flicker, opens the casket, grabs the planchette, grabs his necklace… Puts all three together, and begins to meditate. Are you going to help? Is anyone gonna help?
Archie, or Mr. Maryweather? Mr. Maryweather.
Mr. Maryweather? Oh, I’m so sorry, not Archie, Mr. Maryweather. Archie’s long gone.
(laughing) Mr. Maryweather begins a small ritual after bursting open the door, the shadows are now crawling into the room. Wait, with the planchette–
Help him. The stone, and what else? The planchette, the stone and a necklace that he was wearing.
The necklace. I help him! Gonna sit down, give me a POW roll. Fuck, fucking fuck!
Yeah, I’ll help, I don’t know how, but I’ll help. Shadows begin to claw, and–
(Marisha gasping) Super, super, super success. What’d you roll?
Zero! You rolled a zero?
Wait, does that mean 100? Yeah.
It’s exactly zero! It means–
‘Cause you said this goes to 99 in this–
yeah. So it’s perfect success, you’ve rolled a crit. (screaming)
You critted on that roll? Look, look!
This is here! Erika can see!
It’s all zeros! Three zeros. I was so looking forward to murdering the rest of you. The room begins to howl with the wind and screams as the two of you sit together with this and focus on it. He is gripping the casket with all its might. You can now see looking into the room that there are dozens of backwards people, Archie included, running full-speed towards you, towards the door, ready and hungry like a zombie run. There are also feral cats that have had their faces cut open and scratched in their attempts to push their way out of their cages, as they are running, screeching towards the door for the next group of living people within the building. The casket begins to howl. The casket, almost a vacuum begins to pour within it as the necklace becomes frigid cold. The planchette begins spinning of its own accord, the green jade inside begins flashing occult symbols as it shifts through a series of incantations. As the casket begins to shudder… Does anybody have… You three are left, somebody roll a perception. Give me an intelligence roll really quickly from the three of you, just standard. Mm-hmm.
Nice. That’s an extreme success.
57. In the portraits on the wall, you can see, you catch out of the corner of your eye as you watch… Mr. Maryweather holding for dear life, his reflection begins to waver and vibrate, and a shadow version of himself in the reflection separates from what he’s doing in the material world, and begins rounding up like some wizard conductor of evil, and shadow, forcing all of them into a huge whirlpool of power as he pours all of these spirits into the casket. They are screaming trying to run away now as he collects them in the casket. Chunks and bleed from his reflection are pulled along with them like a gravitational pull as you just watch his reflection lose… Lose thickness and gets light, and light, and finally, closes the casket. And the lights come back on.
(buzzing) Everything seems normal, other than 20 or 30 very, very bloody cat carcasses on the wall, on the floor outside in the other room. And Mr. Maryweather?
He seems fine. He shuts the door.
To the room? To the room. I would ask the two of you to leave and never speak of this. You do not know what this has cost me. It has been contained for now. I may be requesting your services in the future. For now, it is contained again. For now. I will be hiding this artifact somewhere safe ’til such time as we can figure out how to defuse it. Your secrets are safe. We will… come up with a good excuse for your back. There’s shattered glass in there, you were being unruly, does that work for you? Mommy and daddy wouldn’t be surprised. Your mother may be, your father I don’t think so either. Keep that, I think that’ll go a long way towards making them… feel a little better about everything. I don’t know what happened. Thank you. Are you all right, Bentley? (exhales deeply) Yes. I’m fine. What did you do? I have bound it for now, using a bit of my own power, what little I have, I’m just a student. It’s the trouble with sacrificial magic, is it requires sacrifice, and I’m going to be requesting your help in the coming years to figuring out how to untether myself from this thing, if you’re not too thrown by the events of this evening to maintain your service. I would like to keep you on the payroll, if that’s all right. Thrown. Yes. We lost Ida… Archie, Dr. Mason. Some of them may have survived in a fashion. This place, there’s a reason we bring things to this place. Most things that die in here, they don’t ever really leave. It’s… It’s sort of a… trap, if you will. It’s why we brought the pieces here, it’s because we knew it couldn’t leave without getting out a main entrance. So, perhaps in some time, at the very least, we can get them out of here, and hopefully they’ll stay safe from all the other things that are trapped in there. I’m sure they’ll be fine.
And her invention. That invention… Please make sure–
It will be. The world knows. It will still be entered into the gallery under the proper name.
Under her name. Of course.
Aw. A debt is a debt. Her parents will also be compensated the money that was owed. And our compensation?
Paid in full, of course. And then some, I would expect. I know you wanna keep that artifact, so long as you promise that I can gain access to it when I need it, it’s yours. Mr. Maryweather–
We will be employing you again in the future, I imagine. Oh, joy. I hesitate to even ask. What would’ve happened if you had failed? They say that there was a time… when the sun would set, thousands of years ago, and a beast would feed until the sun rose, and it would walk the plains of the earth, consuming whatever it liked. I imagine it would walk again. Hints of it might still be out there. We will do our best to illuminate the night as best as we can. The more light we can make, the harder it’s going to have the time feeding. Perhaps one day we may even finally starve them to death. Are there others like you?
Who knows. Now, we can cover that later. I imagine you’re all tired, and the speech is still going on in the other room–
(laughing) So… Why don’t you do whatever it is that you English do? Put yourselves together, stiff upper lip, and we’ll hide you in here, and I will mention that you are missing and you can just sit and wait for someone to arrive with some medical emergency and you can prepare your lie for them. Does that suit you? Always does. Thanks for the lark. We may call upon you again as well if you are interested. This time, for mutually beneficial, no blackmail of course. I’m always up for a lark. Well, goodnight poor mortals, I hope your cats survive the night. (breaths deeply) Let’s get out of here. And he opens the door into the other room and quietly leaves, not making eye contact with anybody. Well, I suppose this is goodbye for now. I wish you continued success, with the escapades of the night folks. And to you… I hope I don’t see you again for quite a while. Same. It has been wonderful. Where are you going next?
But not really. I think I will go back to the monks. Back to Tibet. We shall see. I think I have much news that they might be interested in hearing, and perhaps maybe I can strengthen my own mind, for future encounters, as I don’t think we are rid of them. Keep them in the light, yes. No playing in the dark. I think I’ll have a night light for the rest of my life now. And you, Captain? Steady on. Steady on. Until the next gala, Hana. Perhaps I’ll come visit you sometime. Please do. No one else will be able to relate to what we saw tonight. (sighs heavily) Well, I suppose I shall go back to my functions and everything, and… my escapades. And I do hope we meet again sometime, Captain, before the next time the world needs saving. If we’re lucky. With that tension, I’m going to leave. Say goodbye to your mom for me. Or hello to your mom. Freudian slip, it’s been a rough night. (laughing) I shall. And I get the fuck out. Who’s Freud?
(laughing) Oh yeah, fuck.
No, Freud’s fine. Was there Freud during this time? Freud’s fine, you’re good.
We’re good? Okay.
You’ll speak later in the outside.
(laughing) Have you found the cat? German fellow with a big mustache. And with that, my good gentlepersons, you have been watching Shadow of the Crystal Palace. (cheering)
Oh, shit. For the further adventures of poor Mr. Maryweather, you can find out what happened to him in this wonderful little box that we were given to play with. You guys, that was a ton of fun, I can’t believe how many of you survived. Can I ask you a question?
Of course. What would’ve happened had we gone out the entrance? Would we have spread darkness and terror everywhere? Yeah.
Yeah. It would open it into the world? If you had managed to get into it, it would’ve made a breach in all sorts of. It would’ve then also been whoever’s trapped in the mirror trying desperately to keep them from getting out. Wow. If more of you had died earlier, oh man, so many strange things. There were a lot of different ways this could go. This was basically a giant version of– What was the mirror? What was the big mirror that we shattered? Yeah, what was the mirror we busted? Oh yeah. That was what was containing it. Oh.
Ah. So, we did let it out!
You did let it out. The Doctor was right!
And the cat demon, well done, you did both.
And the cat demon. Oh, there’s two different ones. Oh, it was very “Cabin in the Woods”, it was just a series of mousetraps and I was waiting to see which ones you kicked. Yeah the fountain–
You kicked some interesting ones.
Wasn’t good either. I’m not gonna keep you guys there for too long, although we are gonna probably be some fun posting on this because I love the sort of, historical insanity of these sorts of games. I do wanna do a special thanks to the cast, first of all, you guys were amazing and I loved it, and our crew worked so bloody hard on this game. Yes! You guys, and thanks to Jenny Newman for coming with the costumes. Jenny Newman!
Jenny Newman! And poor Chris Lucky, who worked his butt off on this. Yes, Lucky! And everybody, and Max, and Danny, everybody did such an amazing job on this amazing set and these amazing creepy shadows, which I’m going to have a long talk with everybody about.
Yes! When the fucking hands reached out of the void, oh.
(laughing) So good.
The fucking hands, man. Yeah, they were a lot of fun, and I’ll probably be talking about how we made some of these. Chaosium, guys, thank you so much for giving us an excuse to get this crazy. And I’ve had a lovely night. Thank you all, and is it Halloween yet? (laughing) Cheers. Well done, sir, well done. The final lantern is snuffed. (laughing)
(growling) Like a symphony playing to an empty theater, Critical Role dines alone without its audience. Yes, that validating and most enthusiastic congregation on the other side of the fourth wall. And what is this fourth wall separating the viewer from the creator? A portal to an often sought point of connection? Or, the Twitch Subscription Zone. On the rare occasion that you miss the live bacchanal boasted by the rag-tag group of thespians on Thursday night, you may always view the show on-demand in the shadow land known as… The Twitch Subscription Zone. Picture, if you will, the necessary pieces to complete a jigsaw puzzle, but it’s up to you to choose how it will be solved. You could, of course, subscribe with your debt rectangle, but many more divergent paths lie before you. Perhaps you found yourself in possession of an Amazon Prime account. You would them wake up to discover a free Twitch subscription each month for a channel of your choosing. But this artifact demands renewal, for you must re-subscribe each month to quench its unyielding thirst. One need not walk alone. Those who have already found their way can illuminate the path for others, via the Gift a Sub button on Twitch. Critical Role is humbled by your subscription, and wishes to thank you from behind the thin veil of this fourth wall. We hope you enjoy our content as much as we enjoy making it. And so, ends another meandering digression. A complicated parody promo down an indistinct highway to the region we call, the Twitch Subscription Zone. (suspenseful music) You will subscribe. Twitch Prime subscribe. Gift subscribe. Subscribe.

100 thoughts on “Call of Cthulhu: Shadow of the Crystal Palace

  1. HEY, there might be some SPOILERS under the thing
    2:30 Glad Sam could make it
    5:10 Traumatizing Travis
    5:55 Intro cinematic
    7:30 Episode Starts
    8:35 Jonathan Lansey gives a fantastic speech
    11:35 The latest in cats
    12:20 Laying out the heist
    17:10 Ida Cogswell
    17:25 Septimus Goodfellow
    19:10 Hanako Hayashi
    20:00 Alexandra Elise O’Neil
    20:20 Dr.Mason Pocket
    22:45 Cpt. Bentley Badger
    23:40 Naming cats
    25:10 Septimus raises the stakes
    30:05 Premature lantern
    32:25 Scooby Doo/Cthulu crossover
    37:30 Nigel Peesee
    41:40 Edison took credit for other people’s designs? How surprising!
    52:25 What spirits do
    53:20 Cat react
    57:25 Show me what you’ve got
    1:02:05 1890 alarm system
    1:04:35 Taliesin does not actually own historical Japanese tech
    1:06:35 Sam Riegel’s signature move
    1:11:05 Current wars
    1:14:35 Taliesin knows what you look like dead
    1:18:20 Taliesin is not King Arthur
    1:22:55 Totally not evil crystal
    1:27:05 Thanks for the update, Septimus
    1:28:55 Keep the bag closed
    1:30:50 Taliesin provided actual secret compartments
    1:33:00 Bentley knows keys
    1:35:05 Human hair, or humans FOR hair
    1:44:00 Lifting Doctor Pocket
    1:54:30 Good pun Taliesin
    1:57:30 That’s DOCTOR Pockets to you
    2:00:05 Figuring out sanity
    2:01:45 Hanako and Bentley
    2:06:10 Sanity panic
    2:09:05 Alexandra and Dr.Mason
    2:13:00 Break Starts
    2:18:00 Break Ends
    2:25:15 Freaking out together
    2:28:40 Septimus sees Them
    2:38:30 Taliesin makes a curious suggestion
    2:40:20 The centipede defense
    2:41:25 The shadows cling
    2:45:50 Septimus drops the act
    2:48:35 These props are amazing
    2:51:25 Alexandra loves the adventure
    2:59:40 The wheel slows to a stop
    3:02:15 Never open that door if there’s no warrant
    3:02:35 Ruby vision doesn’t help
    3:14:20 Catastrophe
    3:22:15 Surrounded by shadow
    3:33:45 Ida goes under
    3:36:55 A good poker
    3:40:40 Septimus loses his head
    3:44:15 Dr.Pocket’s curiosity is satisfied
    3:46:55 Septimus has turned
    3:47:55 Light
    3:49:25 Maryweather begins to fight
    3:53:45 Debriefing
    3:59:45 Goodbyes
    4:04:45 Episode Ends
    Twitch live viewership of this episode peaked around 21,000 people. The in-game start date for the episode was some time in the 1890’s.
    I’m not sure this timestamp thing really lends itself to a horror game, but personally I really liked this. Congratulations Taliesin, Lovecraft would have found this truly horrifying.
    Any moments I missed? Feel free to post them here. Is it Halloween yet?

  2. So Marisha rolled 3 0's, which means a roll of 100 in Call of Cthulhu. They goofed, but I'm wondering how that would have played out had they treated it as a failure. Like, how fucked were they?

  3. Watching this on my Pixel 2 with night light and grayscale enabled was the absolute best.

  4. They should do a four parter in October culminating in a Halloween show.

  5. Taliesin was made for Call of Cthulhu GMing! You have no idea how excited I was to see this, and I'll be running my first ever Call of Cthulhu game at Halloween. Excellent game, Taliesin!

  6. I really appreciated the effort put into this. Would definitely watch this channel often if you had more CoC content.

  7. First everyone rocked this and I generally don't care much for Cthulhu stuff so you guys did the impossible.

  8. Your hair is purple so automatically I find this satire v cute effort and trying…

  9. I legit had nightmares all night after watching this 10/10 would love to wake up in a panic again. Do another!

  10. I LOVE Lovecraftian stuff, and this was an amazing one shot! Lovecraft would be truly terrified by this concept/story. Run more Call of Cthulhu one-shots, Taliesin!

  11. This is an absolute thrill to watch. Taliesin is the perfect keeper with these amazing investigators. I am in love with the set, props and costumes, and I really hope we get to see more Call of Cthulhu in the future! This was my introduction to the game and now I'm hooked. Well done, guys. ^^

  12. Septimus Goodfellow "Celebrity spiritualist" My fucking sides are already gone and im 18 minutes in

  13. I don't recognise VA names very often but HOLY CARP IT'S MY FAVOURITE ROMANIAN KIND OF VAMPIRE!

  14. Very Cabin in the woods, loved it!… although probably shouldn't have watched it late at night

  15. This was a great video to watch, thanks for posting!
    I love the enthusiasium for a non-D&D rpg, this is really great to see. Considering the props and costumes, it's easy to see that everyone got into it in a big way, and looks like it was alot of fun!
    This was good exposure for Chaosium's BRP system, which has been around for four decades or so. I wouldn't mind seeing how Critical Role goes with RuneQuest Glorantha one day
    This was a good idea Critical Role, another enjoyable video!

  16. SPOILERS

    3:50:25 "I was so looking forward to murdering the rest of you." XDD

  17. I regret watching this at 12 am going to bed and getting up at 4 am to finish it

  18. If my intelligence is 70 do I have to push it down to 69 to succeed?
    Is no one going to comment on that?

  19. I desperately need a regular Call Of Cthulhu game now, this was too good to just be a one off!

  20. How are they not all freaking out when Tal brings out the first prop?! That's so cool, he prepared so much and so well, I am impressed!

  21. This came out while I was away on holiday, so glad I finally get to watch a Cthulhu game, and it's being run by Taliesin! Time to turn the lights off….

  22. Taliesin Jaffe this is so good and I have watched it many times and will watch it many more times I love the nature of the episode and I like how the cast is set up. The whole theme is awesome. I hope you have a part 2 in the works since it is said that they will be called upon again if needed. So much more I can say but that would turn into a book thank you for this.

  23. that clutch crit on merryweathers ritual though
    the stars were right
    hilarious that they ended up releasing a keter in the first hour just by screwing up and dropping something

  24. I really really really wanted to enjoy this but the amount of times Taliesin Smacks his lips or his tongue against the back of his teeth, I am unable to finish this 🙁

  25. Is this adventure available for purchase?

    Awesome show folks, just caught it on the iTunes!

  26. 2:48:40 "What is Marisha drinking that's so cloudy?"
    2:52:50 Taliesin licks an absinthe spoon

    Oh, Jaffe, you deliciously theatrical bastard.

  27. I do wish they would make this in to a series. Taliesin was wonderful and the cast my God outstanding but I do understand they have busy lives, but this is just a cheers great game!

  28. It doesn't matter now but 3 zero's on a roll is a 100 and a fumble. A one is a crit success.

  29. Am I alone in thinking that the voice Ashly is using sounds extremely close to Laura's Vex voice?

  30. I've said it before and I'll say it again…

    I could listen to Taliesin reading the dictionary and be perfectly content. What a wonderful voice that man has.

  31. I would really love to see the cast play and run more games besides D&D just like this Call of Cthulhu one shot. There are so many wonderful games out there and I am sure there would be others who would agree. Watching them play some of these other wonderful games would be awesome.

  32. Most painful 50 minutes to watch ever.. 50 mins in & you're failing roll after roll with SIX F%CKING PPL to TURN ON THE LIGHTS. I couldn't watch anymore. Painfully, painfully slow af

  33. You did Lovecraft wrong… it shouldn’t make sense…
    I should know… I’m literally in H.P.Lovecrafts book “The Mountains Of Madness.”
    Also people really don’t understand that H.P.Lovecrafts only public problem at the time was he preferred to hide his appearance, he otherwise was only a mess for the time in private. He at least attempted to keep it as private as possible in hopes of not looking out of place as he knew his vision of the world was unacceptable in public.

  34. Lovely game. It started out a bit cringeworthy with that high-minded denunciation of Lovecraft as a person though.
    Primly distancing ourselves from a paranoid, miserable loner who spent his entire life cooped up in lofts hiding from everyone and everything without ever hurting or attempting to force his ideas on anyone, and died an early death years before getting any real credit for the only lasting impact he ever made on the world, doesn't strike me as moral triumph.

  35. I love the vibe of danger and mistery of this video. Any one with expirience knows a book or 2 with the same vibe?

  36. Is Taliesin's voice an option on audible when listening to horror novels? It should be….

  37. Anyone else think of the Septimus Heap books when they heard Liam's name?

  38. I wonder if the black halo around talisens head was intentional. It brings out his dark angel persona for sure

  39. This was soooo much fun! Thanks for sharing! Now I'm a little sad cuz it's gonna be so hard to find a CoC series to watch/listen to as good as this was.

  40. nice to see you playing another classic rpg. id suggest traveller (any version set in the Imperium or along its fringes) or gamma world (third edition was my favorite) or paranoia (matt played this once on g and s) next. (all great classic games for their genres of hard science fiction galaxy spanning action, post-apocalypse (with humor) and dark comedy/post apocalypse dystopia)

  41. Since Cathulhu is actually a thing, I'd like to see the six cats have an adventure of their own.

  42. Can I just say that I really like that Taliesin brought up Lovecraft's problematic history in the beginning and he did it and a super respectful way to Lovecraft because while he may have been a racist, he still created an amazing mythos and an entire genre that people love with his stories and I think it's important to acknowledge that about Lovecraft. So I'm glad Tal didn't just say "Fuck Lovecraft!" He was actually very well worded and respectful of the game even if he may not have deserved it.

  43. taliesin is smart but he lacks fluidity. he is staccato, he loads, he unloads and just like percy's gun he is sometimes jammed. fluidity is needed to set the tone. he is very sharply cerebral, he can't set a real emotional atmosphere.

  44. All I could think of was how fitting that black circle was framing his head exactly how I imagined the black disc framing the head of osiris before they broke it.

  45. Please tell me this is getting subs…… my auditory processing is Struggling 😭

  46. can anyone tell me the name of the song they used in the beginning??? it's so nostalgic I can't. put my finger on it!

  47. This is fantastic. I would love to play this with others in a horror themed night this Fall. Thank you for showing it to all of us!

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