Crazy Substitute Teachers

yo, wassup HOMESICLES. I’m gonna talk about substitute teachers! I wanna say for the most part, we all like having subs. You like, walk into the classroom, expecting it to be a normal day, and you glance over at the teacher, and BOOM, it’s a sub! YES! Don’t have to try today. Most subs are pretty cool, they don’t really care too much either. and everyone just ends up having a nice easy break day. They have this attitude like: “OK, so I’m just gonna pop in a movie or something… do whatever you want, I’m just here to make sure you don’t all go miley cyrus wild and poke some kid’s eye out with a ruler. But sometimes they don’t care too much and it gets kinda weird… Like once, I had a Math sub, where we were just doing a worksheet or something, and this girl behind me was eating carrots. But all of a sudden, she started choking on one of her carrots and was like gasping and gagging and stuff. And everyone turned around and was mortified. wut. what do we do!? We all looked over at the sub for help and guidance or… something because of all people, he should have a plan. And he was just… looking at her, not doing anything, I’m sure, if the girl could’ve spoke at that time, she would’ve said: “FREAKIN’, I’M CHOKING ON A CARROT HERE!” “WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?!” “DO SOMETHING, YOU BUFFOON! AAGH!” So for a small period of time, everyone was just helplessly looking at this poor girl choking on a carrot. No one knew what to do! FINALLY, one guy got up and did the choking Heimlich Procedure they teach us. It was so legit! He even did the “are you choking” question like they say you have to. If you haven’t heard of the technique, or… for some reason they’ve changed it, The steps are: Approach the person and ask “are you choking?” Do not proceed if they are not choking. *laugh* it actually says that.. Get behind the person and wrap your arms around their waist. Be ready to support them if they faint. Take your fist and place the thumbside against their belly, just above their belly button. Grab the fist with the other hand, and thrust into the belly. And the final step is: repeat thrusts until the object pops out, or until the person faints. So… the girl didn’t faint, he actually got the carrot out of her throat. and everyone was… relieved. And after all that hollabalu, we all kinda looked over to see what the sub had to say about the situation, and.. nothing! :O He just watched the situation with a blank-slate look on his face! Like, what the heck! What are you? I’ve never seen less of a reaction from such a big situation from anyone in my entire life. he should make a reaction channel, come to think of it… He’d blend in with most of the people on YouTube doing it already. Anyway, enough with Mr. Blank-Slate. I remember when I was in high school, we had kinda a main group of substitutes that were common to have when a teacher called in sick or something. And there was this one old man guy, that everyone knew, *pause* and absolutely HATED. And before you say something like: “Oh Jaiden, that’s kind of rude to say.” In our defense, he hated us too. Whenever a person walked in and saw him sitting behind the teacher’s desk, the immediate thought would be: “oh ffff- crap, it’s gonna be a rough day today.” No one had to say it… but we were all thinking it. “OK Jaiden, so what was he like?” Oh, stand up, so you can sit down because I’m gettin’- getting started. Take the strictest person you know… ..and throw them out the window because this guy is now that person. I think he saw himself as a military instructor leading juvenile delinquents because he wanted every child to be behaving: Perfectly. To a T. No funny business. and… yeah, that’s not gonna happen in a high school, sooooo there’s problem one… He would start every class with the same lecture: “Alright, sit down and zip up because we’re taking attendance. If I hear any talking, you’re being written up. I don’t tolerate jokesters in my classroom.” “I’m going to call out your last name, followed by your first name. And if I don’t hear you say “Present” then you’re being marked “Absent”. You should be paying attention because you only have one chance. and I’m not calling names twice.. if I pronounce your name wrong, CORRECT ME. Alright, here we go.” He says that exact paragraph every time he starts a class, and I know it because I’ve had him enough times to have it power-washed into my head. I kinda wanna believe he has it written down in frame somewhere in his house, so he can proudly look at it before he goes to bed every night. And he actually gets mad if you don’t correct him if he pronounces your name wrong. *lol* I know from experience. I don’t care when people pronounce my name wrong, it happens all the time. I’ve gotten used to it. So I thought I wouldn’t make a big deal out of it. “Aneemations…” “Jai-aiden.” “Here.” “Did I say that correctly?” “it’s close enough.” “CORRECT ME NEXT TIME!” uh- sorry? *lols* He reminds me of, if like Oscar the Grouch had a pet lemon, but the lemon was expired by 2 months and he keeps forgetting to throw it away. Like, “Aww crap, the lemon!” “ahh, I’ll do it tomorrow.” And he doesn’t do it tomorrow… So.. I’ll call him Mr. YetToBeThrownOutLemon. just for simplicity. I truly don’t know why Mr. YetToBeThrownOutLemon worked as a substitute teacher. Because you could just SEE the child hatred in his eyes. Somehow, he made everyone in the class feel uncomfortable just by existing. So lemme tell u a STORY about Mr. YetToBeThrownOutLemon. We had him in a Biology class once. and… we were just gonna work on a paper he had to pass out. “Alright, we’re going to be doing a worksheet today. If I hear any talking, YOU’RE BEING WRITTEN UP. This is an individual worksheet, so there’s absolutely no reason to talk to ANYONE at all during this hour.” “Everyone, come up to the front of the room right now and grab a paper. “Umm, Mrs. Grapes does it so each person at a table has a number and she calls out a random number, and that person just gets up and gets the paper for the rest of the table so it’s easier to-” “I WILL NOT HAVE SLAVES IN MY CLASSROOM!” WHAT DID HE JUST SAY?! *lols* This man just compared picking up papers for other classmates to SLAVERY. SLAVERY!!! Good god! I dee- auHH So we did it his way, the 34 of us all got up at the same time, and shuffled to the front of the room, awkwardly squishing together, to grab a paper from the one pile he made for us.” You. are. a fruitcake. A did a lot of other weird, over-the-top things, but this was by far the best thing I’ve ever witnessed from him. Oh, Mr. YetToBeThrownOutLemon. You’re a real piece of work. “No talking.” “I’m going to call out your last name, followed by BLUEEGH BLUEEGHP.” “This is an individual worksheet to su- buffa vullafins reasons.” “I will not have sclaffles in my classroom.” i don’t know what those are. “This is an individual worksheet to sol the jump puffs LA TE EARF.” WEEH *coughing* HA HAHG. *zombie sounds???* metal gear… “Jaiden, is there a Jaiden here… Ja-aiden… a Jaiden.” “ani… anim.. animations of jaiden. is there a ANIMATIONS JAIDEN. JA-JAIDEN. WHAT THE FFFU-”

100 thoughts on “Crazy Substitute Teachers

  1. I remember in school and we had subs we were so bad when little we made them quit

  2. Actually, not me if i hade a sub then i would HATE the day because i would do hard work🙄

  3. I dont like subs i dont like poeaple i dont now teling me wat to do en i am shy.😶

  4. Put Captions (Bosnian) And Go To 2:50
    "oj jjjj-sranje, biće težak dan danas"
    Translation: Ohhhh S*** Its Going To Be A Rough Day Today

  5. Yesterday I had 2 subs
    And 1 was 19 and he told us to just use our phones and be quiet and he didn't say much after that.
    My favorite sub is that kid

  6. i haaatteee having subs 😔👊🏻 they can never pronounce my name… my nAME OS RACHEL

  7. That ain't me when i was in regualr school the substitutes will go ham on you if you are lazy as shit

  8. I once had a sub that we called "Mr. Jeremiah". This guy was the son of one of the math teachers, and since had had nothing else to do, he filled in for 7th and 8th grade alot. This guy couldn't give a single fuck. All he ever really did was pop in a movie and once even let us have popcorn. He was a fan of anime and Call of duty so we all loved him, and whenever you saw him at a desk you knew "Yes! An easy 45 minutes!" I hope y'all have subs like this too!

  9. i dont like subs because they are all very strict and if you say a WORD dedention litrely evrybody got a detention that day but exept ONE GUY ONE litrily teacher dont choose that sub any more DONT CHOOSE A DIFF ONE

  10. In 5th grade once we had a sub who took her shoe off and threw across the room cuz we were talking

  11. I had a split classroom (buildable wall in the middle of it and it was closed most of the time) in sixth grade english.A sub asked the teacher before she left "Do I just sit here"she told the teacher on the opposite side what she said and immediately decided to open the wall and keep it open for the day.

  12. Yeah most people like subs but I had ONE JUST ONEEE just like that old Man U didn’t like but her name was miss thrasher SHE WAS A WHOLE B*** BUT ALL SHE COULD DI IS YELL AND YELL and she just didn’t like us but he new name is miss trasher 🙂

  13. I had a sub in fourth grade and we were doing a thing and there was a stack of papers for each table, held together by a paperclip. Well, one group lost their paperclip, and she made them stay in for recess. To find. A single. Paperclip.

  14. Quote Jaiden"He reminds me of if like Oscar the grouch had a pet lemon, but the lemon was expired by 2 months and he keeps forgetting to throw it away like oh crap the lemon… eh i'll do it tomorrow."

  15. My homeroom teacher is the best person ever. She’s kinda young and one time whilst we were eating lunch she let us watch cat videos on YouTube on our projector.

  16. Omg… at the 2:11 sub teacher was he wearing glasses…? Plz reply if you can because I think I know what he was doing…

  17. 3:00 the strictest person I know will come to me and put me in their car without ac and locked

  18. i think i had the same teacher! Only he wasted our time telling us HIS LIFE STORY!!!!!!

  19. Ahhh ur voice (I spelled your wrong because I'm a robloxian ) witch means I play roblox

  20. I used to have on that every time you needed to yawn she yelled at that person to cover there mouth

  21. We had a substitute when my theology teacher was away. He taught karate as well. He was pretty cool

  22. А у нас нет замов. Просто старшаков просят посидеть с нами.

  23. 4:09 I get my named pronounced wrong too
    My name is sigil
    It’s hard to pronounce it on the first time

  24. My school had a sub once named Mr. Modika
    He was known to sleep in classes.
    He adopted the name
    "Mr. Modicka"

  25. Boy : do you have a crush in me?
    Girl : yes!
    Boy : Do you wanna murder me?
    Girl : no!
    Boy : do you love me?
    Girl : yes!
    Now read it back words.

  26. I would’ve said to the teacher “why did you not do anything she could’ve died!”

  27. there was this one sub we had who was really strict and then next year BOOM welcome to hell ( he was sub gym teacher )

  28. Today in school we had a sub that was like “it isn’t my class so I shouldn’t be teaching you” while we were doing a worksheet on a topic we did like 15 minutes of work and learning on in other classes in total

  29. Idk why subs get mad when u dont corrct them. In my opinion, correcting anybody ESPECIALLY adults is rude. So yeah

  30. Our Old man was a Old LAdy and we all hated her. Her name was Mrs.Booker
    Shout out to Younblood Int

  31. Mr. YetToBeThrownOutLemon should marry my 3rd grade teacher he’d totally fall in love with her she literally told us one day that she’d throw us out the window if she could so ya

  32. We once had a sub for my clarinet class and on that day he brought a trumpet.

  33. My normal sub is named Speeker guy bc he screamed at a speeker when he almost broke it

  34. I had a sub who let us draw on the board! I drew a cute dog! And ari lol the bird

  35. You are stupid add to Titan wing how to make a fire what what the heck Hotel Nikko

  36. the 2nd teacher you were talking about is jus a big stick in the mud!!!

  37. I had a sub today. IT WAS IN ART CLASS!!! -3- and he was American-Japanese I think.

  38. No I prefer my normal teacher when I was in grade 4 and 5 she was nice and she was the 3rd in charge of the school

  39. I usually have 2 of the same subs there both amazing and keep people safe,there not that strict

  40. why did i get the situation of the girl choking on a carrot. i saved that girl aswel and she turned out to be my gf. she fainted for a short while. woke up. thanked me and hugged me

  41. If you don’t make the sub cry you FAILED AS A HUMAN

    This is how Australia works just sayin

  42. Jaiden: Take the strictest person u know… and throw them out the window

    Me:oh ok throws entire family but the dogs out the window so much better 😀

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