Eddie and the Car | POEM | Kids' Poems and Stories With Michael Rosen



Eddie and the car the stupidest thing I have ever done happened in France we were going to have a picnic so we were driving along the road in our little yellow Renault 4 have you ever seen a Renault 4 it's like a square tin box if you lean on it the walls are so thin your hand goes straight through the side of the car we were off to have a picnic have you noticed how long it takes parents to make up their minds where to stop for a picnic it takes us longer to find where to have the picnic than it takes to eat it we stop we get out we spread the sheet we unload the boxes and bags and bottles we sit down and it what's that what on earth could smell like that a dead dog okay everyone back in the car drive on we stop we get out we spread the she we unload the boxes and bags and bottles we sit down and it's wasps hundreds of them okay everyone back in the car drive on in the end we got to this perfect place back the car up a little slope laid everything on the ground sat down Eddie do you want some chicken no Eddie eat you want some crisps hmm a drink now right well you toddle off and leave us to eat in peace so Eddie who was three years old at the time walked off to the car and got into the backseat he looked out the window and called out look at me I'm in the car Joe who was seven looks over and starts giggling back at Eddie look Eddie dad says joke turn round Joe don't take any notice of it hmm it only encourages him turn round then Eddie climbed into the front seat of the car he grabbed hold of the steering wheel and shouted out at us look at me I'm driving and Joe says look Eddie dad he's driving I say turn around no don't take any notice of it it only encourages him turn around hmm we went on eating then Joe looked up and said dad the cars moving I said don't be silly Joe and I turned round to look at the car he was right the car was moving slowly down the slope towards the road with Eddie at the wheel he's screaming the cars moving the cars moving now if you were a sensible intelligent person at this moment you might perhaps go over to the car open the door get Eddie out jump in jam on the brakes and stop the car that would be the sensible thing to do slightly less sensible but still quite sensible would be to go over to the car open the door get Eddie out close the door and wave goodbye to the car at least Eadie would be safe what I did was try to stop the car I rushed over and grabbed hold of the pillar between the two doors and tried to stop the car going down the slope Eddie was screaming out the window the gas moving and I'm grunting back at you I know it's moving all the time the car is moving down the slope and I'm hanging on on the roof of the car is a tray of peaches so Joe is calling out dad look at the beaches the peaches are flying off the roof of the gun I'm saying never mind the pitches and hit are you shouting the cars moving I know it's moving now I know that what we've got coming up next is the road so I think it'll be flatter there the car will slow down I'll be able to stop the car we get to the road the car doesn't slow down I am NOT able to stop the car ahead look at the features nevermind the beaches the cars moving I know it's moving we are now heading for a 12-foot ditch the car knows down the ditch with me still hanging on it bounces once twice on its nose and lands up stuck headfirst in a hedge with its wheels spinning in midair I hope from the door grabbed hold of Eddie got him out and he jumped into his mother's arms and bitter he sank his teeth right into her arm mmm Joe is walking around safe look at the pages yeah look at the peaches Eddie is okay now to get the car out of the hedge get in start up into reverse and nothing the little yellow Renault 4 has front-wheel drive the front wheels are turning over over and over in midair and nothing else is moving what to do I got out the car and looked around there's no one anywhere we're in the middle of the French countryside we're stuck in a hedge miles from home then I looked again and up the road I could see in a field someone's backside a man was bending down digging potatoes so I ran up the road and I spoke to him excuse it while Monsieur gist he's only just be stupid and I'm English and I'm stupid and my little boy got on the front seat of the car and the car went down the hill and it stuck the man stood up and slowly wagged his finger at me jammie jammie-jammie never never never never let a child onto the front seat of a car they can easily yeah I know that now I said but how do I get the car out he then raised both hands by his side and said both this is French for I haven't got a clue you're on your own mate try it look raise both hands by your side hands upwards and as you said you puff your cheeks out so now odd far away in the distance I see a man plowing a field so I started off running up a road towards him and as I'm running along I start to realize that I am only wearing my underpants when we had the picnic I thought that I would sunbathe so here I am running down the road in my underpants no matter must press on as I got nearer to the field where the man was plowing I started thinking how do you get someone to stop how'd you get someone to stop plowing a field so I climbed over the fence and stood in front of the tractor held up both my hands and started waving I don't suppose the farmer had ever seen a large hairy bloke in his underpants standing in front of his tractor waving his hands but he brought the tractor after me and stopped it and he said Oh bah which is French for well have you got something to say or not or are you completely stupid as you said you have to nod your head upwards leaving your mouth open after you've said it the but it sounds a bit like bang doesn't it said through your nose oboe so I said excuse my Monsieur yes he's on Glacius we stupid I'm English and I'm stupid and my little boy got on the front seat of the car and the car went down the hill and it stuck the man looked at me and slowly wagged his finger at me and said jammie jammie-jammie never never never let a child get in the front seat of a car because they can easily yeah yeah yeah no I know that now but do you think you could help me I could pay you it it would be very nice if so three hours later after he had lunch he came along with his tractor his wife his dog and a long chain they tied the chain round the back bumper of the car and they pulled and they heaved and they heaved and they pulled just like the story of the enormous turnip and they pulled and they heaved the bumper right off the car Thanks well in the end they got the little yellow Renault four out of the bush and out of the ditch and after we had kicked it a few times it worked it was a little bit difficult going round corners but it worked we've got a photo of the little yellow Renault 4 stuck in the ditch in our photo album it's great it reminds me of the stupidest thing I've ever done

31 thoughts on “Eddie and the Car | POEM | Kids' Poems and Stories With Michael Rosen

  1. All of your comments are appreciated and MODERATED FOR APPROPRIATE CONTENT – Please press like, subscribe and activate alerts

  2. THE CARS MOVING!
    I KNOW ITS MOVING!
    THE CARS MOVING!
    I KNOW ITS MOVING!
    THE CARS MOVING!
    I KNOW ITS MOVING!
    THE CARS MOVING!
    I KNOW ITS MOVING!
    THE CARS MOVING!
    I KNOW ITS MOVING!
    THE CARS MOVING!
    I KNOW ITS MOVING!

  3. "Look at the peaches!"

    *"N E V E R M I N D
    T H E P E A C H E S !"*

  4. I hate to remind you of it but I'm so sorry for your loss, Mr. Rosen. Eddie sounds like he was the spitting image of his father and a heck of a guy. 🙂

    We almost lost my grandmother to septicemia a few months back, doctors told her she was hours away from death if we hadn't decided against her wishes to take her to the emergency room. Hard to believe with all of todays medications and technologies that the germs inside us can still be some of the most dangerous :/

  5. Who runs down the road with only their underwear hahah 😂😂

  6. “So here I am, running down the road, in my underpants” That would sound weird if you didn’t know the story

  7. No. The French phrase for "I haven't got a clue. You're on your own, mate." would be "Je n'ai pas la moindre idée. Vous êtes seul, mon pote."

  8. I used to have dreams that I got left in the car while my mom was talking to someone and the car, while I'm in it, would slide backward down a steep hill and no matter how much I bang on the window no one notices.

  9. Its like reading a book! There is a picture of everything you say in my head! Great story!!!!!!

  10. We're Americans stuck in France for eight years, we spend an enormous amount of time doing stupid stuff so we're in no position to "Jamais, jamais" you!

  11. Me and my little brother were laughing so much when Eddie bites his mom's arm for no reason at all.

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