Katelyn's poems week 4



hi Caitlin thank you so much for your work this week you know I I was just rereading your discussion post because I remembered that you were talking about the difficulty of the prompts that you worked the difficulty you had working with the prompts this week and I the reason I returned to your discussion posts is because I think the results of the work that you did this week are absolutely lovely and so I'm glad you tried it even though it felt difficult even though you had to leave your house your air conditioned house in the middle of the day to go out into the desert heat to do this work I'm really I'm really grateful you did I'm really grateful you tried so let's start with Reid Park and let's start with your questions suggestions for the title you know I think the let me see you know I think it's hard for me to title another person's poem or offer suggestions for a title but I think that leaving a poem untitled is also completely fine I think it's okay if it's untitled or simply calling it Reid Park would be fine too a simple descriptor that gives your readers an opportunity to have a concrete link into what you're about to describe so I think either untitled or something simple like Reid Park would work how can I make this a narrative poem you know I think you have the beginnings already of a narrative poem I think you have the beginnings of here's this places become a tradition and then you talk about the details that you see as you're walking along I love tangerine light dimming by the way that's a beautiful image um and I like crossing the bridge the pond of ducks you know I think you're already creating a narrative it's just a short narrative so if you wanted to if you wanted to turn this into a longer narrative I think you just take a long walk and record more details in terms of the unfamiliar place a mountain that we know you weren't excited about going to can you create more rhythm and rhyme and just the poem end to abruptly you know I do think it ends rather abruptly and I think that as long as that's a conscious decision that's okay but if you're asking the question then perhaps there's something more that you have to say here um I will say that this stanza right here was my favorite um reminisce of a good time speckled on the ground I think is really interesting um I like the serpent road I like leaving the civilization behind but it seems like if the poem feels like it ends abruptly to you then what you could do is you could when it's a little cooler go back to II Mountain take a longer walk and see if you can record more information about what you see thank you so much for your work this week Caitlin

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