Kobe Bryant Performs Slam Poem About Steve Urkel


-Ladies and gentlemen,
here to perform a slam poem about the 1990s sitcom
“Family Matters,” Kobe Bryant. [ Cheers and applause ] -Transformation. Urkel to Urquelle. Suspenders to lapels. From nerdy Steve,
“Got any cheese?” So puny and weak, a metamorphosis
from geek to fleek. From caterpillar to butterfly, the cocoon, a metal chamber,
re-arranger of DNA. From nottie to hottie, different person, same body. Using science and playing God, he became an Adonis, a charming disarmer
with style and confidence. With the pull of a lever
like the wave of a wand, he enters a nerd,
but now he emerges….Stefan. [ Cheers and applause ] Ha! He laughs in the face of God. Is it a sin, though, to change who you are, to win the heart
of Laura Winslow… [ Laughter ] …whom he woos as he coos,
“Wake me, shake me, break me, but, baby, don’t forsake me.” But this transmogrification, this Stefan-ification of Steve is but a reprieve
‘fore the Boss Sauce wears off. [ Laughter ] Steve. Stefan. Steve. Stefan. Who am I? What have I done? As one man retracts
and fades to black, the other appears
in the place he was at. Face in a mask,
he doesn’t react, just looks in the mirror. A stranger stares back and asks, “Did I do that?” [ Cheers and applause ] [ Chuckles ]

100 thoughts on “Kobe Bryant Performs Slam Poem About Steve Urkel

  1. HA! Look! A famous sports celebrity doing a thing that's not a sport! He's hilarious!

  2. When Kobe Bryant got an email to appear on Jimmy Fallon, he thought they said they wanted him to rape, not rap. Shoulda stayed in school for those spelling lessons.

  3. I love Kobe and all that, but I don't get the point of this. Am I weird?

  4. Kobe is so goddamn charismatic. He's surprising a great actor too actually.

  5. Kobe Bryant was honestly one of the GREATEST NBA PLAYERS…but this is VERY cringeworthy. It reminds me of his attempt at having a modelling career yearsss ago. YIKES

  6. Not only is Kobe in my top five of all time great players, and the most eloquent basketball player since Kareem Abdul-Jabbar – but DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN HE'S FINE!!!!!

  7. Jimmy wtf did you do to Kobe?! This is not the same Black Mamba i used to know! Lmfao

  8. The hell kobe, this nigga got hella time on his plate since he retired

  9. Kobe has become so eccentric. I love every minute of it. Wel be seeing him in the spotlight for some time.

  10. Had he been famous during Family Matters original run, Kobe would have guest starred in that Basketball episode.

  11. Webster is still plotting his ultimate revenge.. Careful, Urkel.. he's coming for you!

    With a teeny, tiny baseball bat.

  12. I swear Kobe's poetry about Urkel speaks directly about my entire channel lol… so thank you retired Kobe!

  13. the most UNFUNNY skit in the history of late night talk shows. People were laughing cause they felt bad for him. I feel very bad for kobe. poor thing.

  14. Kobe did really good. wow. impressed. He looks hot too. heyyylllooo

  15. I really enjoyed his appearance on Jimmy Fallon's show. I had no idea he was such a good actor. Impressive!

  16. This was just weird…between this slam poetry, and the ones done by Tom Hanks and Sam Jackson…Sam Jackson's is easily the best.

  17. This nigga done gone crazy. Give this nigga a basketball team to stay busy.

  18. 1:58 Wait, "fades to black"? Of all words, of all phrases▪◾◼⬛black🏴

  19. Can we just appreciate for a minute how great of a performance that was from Kobe? I mean not everyone can tell a poem with that articulation, charismatic expressions and overall humorous effect like that. He is talented in that aspect for sure.

  20. We never knew how fucking crazy Kobe was because he was busy playing training and doing basketball 80% of his life. lmfao. THIS DUDE'S OFF THE FUCKING ROCKER MAN. but okay bro. do you lol. I have not felt any of his art/performance stuff since he retired. That Muse shit is WEIRD.

  21. My favorite player doing poetry of one of my favorite sitcoms?!? Hilarious!!!

  22. Being straight and all, i just want to say if I was a girl I'd like me some Kobe 247365

  23. que the millenials mad dash to find out the origin of Stefan Urkelle

  24. I'm now certain; Turtlenecks look bad on everyone. If Kobe rocks out a Turtleneck and it doesn't look good, than it won't look good on anybody else.

  25. Kobe is my second favorite ball player but there is not one funny bone in his body!

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