Paul Grundy – Author of – My Story

my name is Paul Grundy I'm the author of JW fax and here is my story I was raised that Jehovah's Witness by loving parents my grandmothers were witnesses as was my auntie and many of my cousin's after I left home my father became a circuit overseer for 20 years and my sister and her husband served in Bethel before they had children I grew up in a coronation in Tasmania where many of the older witnesses expressed the strictly fundamental viewpoint that Jehovah directed the organization and very shortly he was going to destroy anyone who is not a jehovah's witness as promoted in the watchtower I thought I was never going to die in fact I didn't even think I was going to get through school however Armageddon had not come by the time I matriculated and unusually for witnesses in the 1980s my parents allowed me to get a university education I felt I was able to justify this because whilst I was going to university I was also regular pioneering my parents converted from Catholicism in 1973 after studying with governing body member Jeff Jackson's father-in-law Frank Alcock Frank also studied with me when I was a teenager and I came to know Jeff Jackson on a personal basis Frank was very intellectual and so we studied the deeper doctrine of the watchtower as a teenager rather than enjoying novels I would spend my time reading books such as Babylon the Great has fallen God's kingdom rules they were different times back then now most followers have very little more than a superficial knowledge of watchtower doctrine being gregarious I came to know over a thousand witnesses personally what always bothered me about this was that many of these witnesses were doing shocking things and many worldly people that I met seemed to be very nice I could not reconcile why God was going to kill billions of these worldly people and save Jehovah's Witnesses simply for a label the worldly people generally knew nothing about Jehovah's Witnesses or even this the barest minimum so how could they be judged as evil rejecters of Jehovah it was my time at Bethel that convinced me that the watchtower society does not have Jehovah's direction in 1994 a Bethel like friend of mine was appointed as an elder whilst he was committing adultery it was later discovered that he'd been committing adultery for seven years in fact he even bought the woman into Bethel one night when his wife went to the meeting this proved to me that God's Holy Spirit is not involved in directing the organization or at least congregational appointments though weakening my faith I did not know enough about watchtower history or alternate doctrinal viewpoints to know whether the watchtower was at least the closest thing to the truth I was too afraid to find out afraid that if I read anything that was not from the watchtower I'd be influenced by apostates afraid that I might be wrong and died Armageddon afraid of being shunned by my family and my friends I'm very afraid of entering the evil world knowing no one and believing that everyone is evil and it's a depressing place to live in 1994 a left Bethel feeling that the watchtower may not Payne the truth I started to wonder what would happen to the organization in 20 years when the last of the 1914 generation had died but an Armageddon still had not come I could not imagine the watchtower shutting up shop and saying well we were wrong the last of the generation have died so expected that a new generation teaching was going to have to be formulated or despite predicting this change I was in shock when just the year later in 1995 a new generation in teaching did in fact come out and one that got rid of any reliance on a date prediction distancing itself from the time-specific generation prophetic interpretation so much earlier than I had expected proved to me that the governing body did not have faith that Armageddon is closed despite knowing that Holy Spirit doesn't direct you have his organization and losing trust in the doctrine the fear of loss and loneliness was so strong that I could not leave my cultural background my family or my friends and this drove me to continue attending meetings for further 10 years however the constant derogatory statements about how evil the world and worldly people are started to really irritate me and I began to miss more and more meetings until by 2004 I was inactive and really could see no point in life itself in 2004 the elders began to pressure me to reactivate myself wanting to know what was my problem I told them that I had little faith so they told me that I needed to prove the truth to myself by studying more little did they realize that I knew more about watchtower doctrine than most people do and yet what they told me triggered something in my mind because I realized I only knew watchtower doctrine I had not really studied alternative points of view and I really owed it to myself to prove whether watchtower doctrine really was trust we're lien really was the truth I needed to confirm what the watch represents is accurate and why other people could believe things so different than what you hope as witnesses did I decided the logical place to start was with the reasoning book because that has a whole range of different topics in alphabetical order so I quite literally started from a the first topic beginning with a which I think was abortion and then worked my way through the book to research each topic from numerous different sources on the 26th of December 2004 a devastating tsunami resulted in the death of over 200,000 people I was overcome by fears Jehovah's Witnesses can commonly are whenever there's an earthquake that may be Armageddon was about to occur then I received a text message from a friend of mine stating not to be afraid and that a tsunami had cured a similar amount of people in a similar location in 1737 this became one of the first topics that I started to research with the information found at my article on earthquakes I cannot express how absolutely in shock I was and how much anger I feel and learning just how deceptive the watch there is as the so called 20 times increase in the earthquakes in our day was what was one of the underpinning foundations of my faith I felt that this was scientific evidence that we are living in the last days and to find that there has not been any more earthquakes in the last thousands of years and this was just an absolute deceptive lie on the part of the watchtower to manipulate people absolutely destroyed me before this moment I could justify that the governing body may not be directed by Holy Spirit but they directed the most genuine loving honest religion on earth the one that was closest to the truth now I came to realize that Watchtower will lie to support his doctrine and that the religion uses coercive persuasion to manipulate and control members the next few months I became consumed by research most witnesses will question the validity of at least some Watchtower doctrine but as they cannot openly question any you watchtower doctrine cognitive dissonance takes over I had spent my tire life suppressing countries of thoughts and regurgitating Watchtower proscribed beliefs to finally be able to evaluate information rather than blindly input the information was quite literally mind-blowing freedom of the mind and freedom from mind control is vitally important to people I stopped attending meetings in early 2005 and attempted to slip out or as I now know it's called fade out I'd like to say that the shock and disappointment with the watchtower was well compensated for by the amazing that I felt it finally being able to link and learn accept the emotional toll was so strong it was almost too much to bear and leaving was just incredibly emotionally difficult I went through a post-traumatic shock becoming very emotional and finding it very difficult to concentrate and I ended up losing my job in the process and experiencing two very difficult years financially I continued to devote myself to researching watchtower doctrine in an effort to prove to myself that I wasn't being blinded by Satan or misled by my own desires and sinful or Tyrian motives the more research I did the angrier I became and determined to help my family see that the watchtower was not the truth and see through the manipulation and falsehood I did not understand at the time the power of mind control and rather than assist them all I did was create alienation and resentment that to this day have not been able to change I started to locate and find out about all my childhood friends as I left the state that I was brought up in and I had travelled through different congregations I found that of 40 people that I grew up with over half four disfellowshipped some had barely been contacted by their parents for almost 40 years others were wracked by fear of Armageddon others sadly committed suicide an examination of Watchtower publisher records identifies the witnesses have one of the highest turnover rates of any religion which means that there are hundreds of thousands verse Allah affected by this religion and who are actively being shunned today by their families other statistics show that the divorce rate amongst Jehovah's Witnesses is the same as the population high that they have the lowest levels of education and the lowest income levels of any established religion in developed countries I also hope to one day be off to do some research into the effect that our cults have on suicide rates as I know just from the number of witnesses that were friends of mine the committed suicide that anecdotally that far outweighs the armed suicide rate of the developed world oppose the JW facts wanting to assist people find objective and factual information in an easy-to-follow format in the hope that helping other witnesses I avoid the confusion I had felt for ten years prior to leaving would help them be able to move on with their lives I found that many that leave who did not do the research do not ever get over their ingrained guilt and fear that results from being a witness I also want to help Bible studies get a secondary opinion of what the watchtower is teaching so they can make an informed decision before joining such a religion so I think it's important to have both sides of a story before baptism it was difficult teaching myself to present the information in an objective manner without letting the emotional side creep in however I feel for the site to be the most effective the information I presented has to be completely accurate and honest and I always welcome people who would send me any information that indicate have made an error somewhere originally jwf XCOM was anonymous but about six months after my leaving and my last meeting and the site going live the eldest found out about it and traced it back to me they arrived one night at my doorstep and announced that a judicial committee was being formed I wrote a letter requesting that instead of being dis fellowshipped I should have my baptism annulled there's a minor I really wasn't in a position to make a lifetime commitment to an organization with such important ramifications they refused to accept my reasoning and went ahead and formed the Judicial Committee this meeting was traumatic and eye-opening in my request for annulment for a number of points outlining why I could not accept your home as witnesses were the truth but throughout the meeting the orders refused to discuss a single point it became apparent they didn't care if I even believed in the Bible or if I believed in God there was just one question that I had to answer and that was did I believe that the watchtower society was Jehovah's organization it was announced shortly after this meeting that I was no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses well the next six months became even more emotionally traumatic overnight I was cut off from my family and my network of friends yet at the same time I experienced an incredible high I was 36 and for the first time I felt really alive 3 I not understood how depressed I had been as a witness for many years I can now see the beauty in the world around me and also the beauty and worldly people I now felt connected rather than being just an observer I was free from the perpetual negativity that the watchtower instills with its need to reconcile everything as the evil last day is filled with evil people that God must destroy however I could not overcome the deep hurt of losing my family will stop my mind constantly replaying what could I do to change things the only way I was able to control my thinking was to spend time with a cognitive behavioral therapist which I absolutely recommend to anyone in a similar situation because it really does teach you to learn how to think positively and has made a dramatic effect on my life one of the hardest things I have come to accept is that a Jehovah's Witness parent or a sibling will put the organisation above their family there are few exceptions to this rule witness parents are convinced that by shunning their own family it is for your benefit and that will bring you back to Jehovah which really is a little more than a motional blackmail they are also convinced that shunning you is a requirement for themselves to get everlasting life but it goes much deeper than that you are confronting their belief system and that is more precious than family or certainly was more precious than I am another difficulty with leaving was that I realized that I could not trust any of my beliefs virtually everything I believed had been dictated to me since birth in my research I'd come to understand the way watched our presents fallacious logic to manipulate the conclusion of the readers it became necessary for me to learn how to evaluate information initially and then over time reevaluate every single belief moral and ideal that I had over the years friends from the past that made contact as they too came to realize that watchtower doctrine is based on untruths and fallacies with the passing of the hundred year anniversary of Jesus invisible 1914 reign a hundred years of Lies at the end is just a few years away more are coming to the conclusion that the watchtower doctrine cannot be trusted I look particularly forward to my niece and nephew coming to the that is not the truth so that I can get to know them and also to be there to support them when their parents are no longer permitted to during the years that I was questioning things I had no desire to have any children in this world at the age of 38 two years after being this fellowships I had my first child Zack welcoming a son into the world and watching him changed daily has just been the absolutely greatest joy of my life I love him for himself and could not be more proud of how he is turning out every single day that is so different to the manipulative way that I was brought up only being considered a success if I shared the same beliefs as other people I am strongly against any religion that manipulates its members and look forward to a time when atrocities done in the name of religion end whether they be in the form of terrorist acts religious wars violence shunning of family members allowing family members to die refusing medical treatment or just the control of beliefs and emotions through fear and guilt I'm optimistic for the minimization of injustice in the name of religion through education seeing the Internet as the tool to increase availability of education over the coming decades that is why I'm so passionate about JW facts calm and hope that we can use the internet to put an end to religious groups that use fear and guilt to manipulate their members particularly those ones that split up families

26 thoughts on “Paul Grundy – Author of – My Story

  1. Lost my family thirty years ago. Before being a witness, my brother and I were so close. Everyday I wish that he would wake up and talk to me again. I know it is very unlikely, since he is married to a JW and all his children are JWs

  2. May I ask how to tell the beginning of shunning…I had a Bible study in my home for over a year and an not attending the Kingdom Hall?

  3. I, too had the same doubts on doctrine. My issue was with the foreign language congregation, ASL. I'm deaf but do not care for sign language as its not my first language. I went wherever I went, English or another language and just sat in the meetings even going out in service. Some English congregations shut you out simply because you're deaf. Others welcome and use you. Why couldn't they just use you in wherever congregation you chose to be in for whatever reasons? They even talked about that recently in the WT. One elder even said to me that I was not to be allowed to drive in service for safety reasons due to my deafness. I was issued an license and have no marks on my record so that isn't the reason. It's the word, "deaf" that they have a problem with. I have never found another deaf person inside that organization that understood English well enough to delve deeper into doctrine except for one sister, my last Bible teacher who was deaf herself but loved English more than ASL. She was 55 years older than me and I lived with her for several years before she died. We had all-nighters discussing Bible teachings against their teachings. What we discovered was not pretty. Now here I am, refusing to give further support to the organization as of April 12th of this year. I kept my notes from those discussions.

  4. The Elders dont come around anymore…….Cause they know i could change their faith!!!…….Literally!……..they fear me cause they know what Mr. Grundy knows, they know that the Watchtower, bible and tract society will change their "god damned bible" to support their doctrines!!!…….the elders KNOW their fucked!…..they know it, but they have their own family well being is at stake!……thats why they dont come by…… a scary man!……to them……LMAO!

  5. I thought this was the truth till I did research, now. Awake, I feel so stupid , I’m so happy for the internet and channels like yours

  6. Paul, what you said about not realising how depressed you were as a JW really resonated with me, since I’ve left the cult, I’ve never been happier or more relaxed, I’ve been able to reduced my antidepressants. As a JW my depression was intense and at time debilitating. I’m so happy to be free of it. Free to be myself and be happy.

  7. God told men to be vigilant bcause the ennemy can appear as an angel of light.They trust their leaders instead of GOD. The real reason people FALL is bcause of lack of knowledge. Most of us are too lazy to read their bible, or read only part of it,or read passages at random. That is the reason they fall for satan lies.The bible is like a puzzle, in order for it to make sense ,one need to read from genesis to Revelation. I did .THAT is why i say confidently THAT the doctrine of Jw and Mormon would not stand if their members read the bible fully.Again God said cursed is the man that put their trust in man.when someone buy a toaster or a food processor or anything in between it came w a manuel.So does God.He send his manuel. The words of God has final authority.

  8. You truly did create a gem on the internet. Thank you so much! It has helped me bring my loving girlfriend out of the cult and see exactly just who is Jesus Christ found in the scriptures and accept him and only him as her Lord and Savior. The rest of her family is next on our radar!
    Thanks again!

  9. Fascinating listening to your story. Thanks for sharing. Happy you can let your mind think for itself

  10. Paul’s doing such great work for the ex-JW (& soon to be ex-JW) community & even on informing the general public. On a completely unrelated side note.. Paul is a very attractive man. Lol. Am I right ladies (and certain gents)? 😉

  11. I just wanted to tell you again how much I appreciate your work. I have watched this one a few times it really keeps me going.

  12. Hi Paul thanks for sharing your experience with us and I remember the book you can live forever on the Paradise earth and I'm glad that you have research the watchtower and it has links to freemasonry and zionist Charles Taze Russell was a freemason and an I have been studying an I could feel the brain washing and I have family who were in the organisation and they also shun family members and they have sexual abuse of children and people in their organisation think they are guided by holy spirit and the way there kingdom halls are built is like the masonic buildings and I know that they have changed their Bible and they have taken certain verses out I really enjoyed listening to your story Paul and you an the other ex jws who woke up to the lies this organisation tells me that they are not the truth

  13. Thank you Paul for your testimony!! I have been disfellowshipped twice since the year 2000 and now being 11 years I've been gone after the second disfellowshipping in 2008 I still carried with me the guilt and the fear because I had not gone back I am 43 years old and have carried this with me and it wasn't until about four months ago that I started to wake up.. your testimony helps me to feel that I'm not alone even though feelings of despair and even thoughts of suicide are almost too much to bear it's nice to hear that it can get better thank you Paul! I wish you much happiness!!

  14. I attended JW meetings until age 14 and now I am 61. I disagree with you about one thing. As a 'worldly person' I can attest that we are all scum deserving destruction. Who better to cleanse this planet and return it to a paradise state than it's Creator?

  15. Just wondering. Are they capable of poisoning a person, with a substance?

  16. Half of the people I grew up with in the congregation are either disfellowshipped or PIMO. And sadly two died because of this religion.

  17. I don't believe in Jehovah, but I do believe in Yahweh – period.

  18. Was wondering if you ever moved onto another religion or do you consider yourself an atheist now?

  19. Thank you for your web site! I was a 4th generation and it was ingrained deeply. Because of JWFacts I was able to deprogram! It is a tool I use on a regular basis 👍👏

  20. Omg so glad you brought up the earthquakes!!! If you ever get a chance to read a newspaper from the late 1800s or even the 1930s you will see people screaming about the decline of society and how things have gotten so bad they don't know how the world can go on after this event happened or that disaster happened. It has been the end of the world for somebody for the last 2000 years.

  21. Such a handsome son you have, thankful for all of your work with JW. Facts, God Bless

  22. How did I miss this story for 11 months? I think I knew you when I was on the inside. Thanks for doing what you do.

  23. Greetings Paul. I can't thank you enough for your site and story. The 1995 article on generations was a tipping point for me too. It coincided with an "argument" I was having with a work colleague who challenged me to "live in the moment that I may be wrong about 1914". That "moment" became reality just a few weeks later when that article came out. I was blown away! I've been out now for about 12 years and my family has nothing to do with me. My "family" has been substituted by friends in much the same way that I have been by brothers in the cong. (Mk 10:29). Like you, friends from long ago who have faded or have been dis-fellowshipped have now become good friends today. I find it exciting now even though for a long time I felt lost and depressed and alone. The internet has real value at times like these! (BTW, I'd like to know if my daughter served in Bethel the same time as you. Not sure this is the right place to ask…?

  24. I am sorry that your family shunned you. But happy that you are spreading truth and saving others from joining an organization that causes so much pain and leads people away from Jesus. Hopefully some will read or hear and understand the words of Jesus in the 4 gospels and fill their hearts with joy.

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