POEM EDITION – SEBASTIAN ROASTS COMMENTS


This is a poem I have spoken If this is stolen I’ll be broken Oh boy. That was probably the worst poem on here. Oh well you would be Terribly Terribly Wrong, I wish you were right *cries on the inside* But you’re not Oh God T_T The theme of this episode is poems aaaaaaahhhhh Poems Poems How they are very close to my heart So let’s read some of my favorite and worst poems I read on my comment section of Ten thousand or whatever the fuck there was Your eyes glow red Ciel’s eyes bloom blue Alois is dead and thank fuck too Sebastian asked for a poem so he can roast me alive But he can’t roast me As bad of a Phantomhive Well done, Kazuni-kun That was a fantastic poem And you’re right, I can’t roast you as bad as Phantomhives Fortunately for you You were probably one of the best poems we’ve received. Sadly, it only goes downhill from here… There was a young lord from London Who founded the company Funtom Who sells sweets, toys and other treats To little children who run around the streets His past is painted with blood and fire He sought revenge and soared even higher From the filth of the city to the heights of the reapers A game for his soul can be called finders keepers His many pawns play out on his board He plays to his best to best the criminal horde He sends Sebastian the knight to knock them all down When they see the sight of him their trousers turn brown He got arrested one day and no-one knew why As he was dragged away, Elizabitch went to cry While people in prison couldn’t if he was a girl or a boy The truth was he was bent over naked as a happy meal toy Oh such elegance Such beauty in one poem Oh fantastic I will say though that I was extremely confused on the second to last line I admire your intention Of grammar correction It feels (fills) me with affection That someone that has a connection With the grammar section I admire your selection Of choosing the grammar collection The proper perfection Of a Phantomhive gentlemen I’m glad I ‘feel’ you with affection Why are all these poems good so far? I hate myself for choosing these There was once a butler named Bassy His manners were known to be classy But when tying corsets for his bratty young lord His intentions became rather trashy Lauren Hope What are you trying to insinuate? Are you implying that I get a little ‘attracted’ to the young lord in a corset? Please, he’s a four at best and you know it Cranberries are red Ciel’s parents are dead I want Elizabitch’s head And you in my bed Well I’m sorry, are you a telletubby? No, I didn’t think so… Then I decline your offer I admire your roasting But sir you are just boasting You think we admire that your grammar is correct But most people here are here to get erect Most people don’t come here by choice For half are just here to get fucked by your voice You’ve just been roasted, can’t you see? I’d like to see you try to roast me. Well Southern Narnia you would like to be roasted Well thankfully for you I’ve spotted a critical mistake On the verse “Most people don’t come here by choice” You spelt ‘come’ incorrectly You spelt it C O M E, when it infact it should’ve been spelt C U M You see, you are correct that most people don’t come here by choice But they also don’t cum here by choice You see, people can’t help them self when I’m roasting bitches Precision is key for a butler such as I As you must be dedicated, beautiful, dutiful, and let nill pass you by None of my tasks I dare leave to fate As a reliable member of the Phantomhive Estate This poem speaks true As it’s nice and precise That my grammar, you see Is no less than precise Dearly trust in my words, and I shall never stutter For I am simply one hell of a butler You nearly summed me up perfectly dear But you have forgotten a few crucial things about me One, you forgot that my mixtape is indeed fire. As I have demonstrated numerous times Two, you’ve forgot to mentioned how amazing my roasting skills are And lastly, you’ve forgot my unhealthy obsession with cats and feline creatures=^o.o^=Roses are red Violets are blue Ciel is a fag So are you Congratulations Kris on learning the word ‘fag’ I’m sure it would’ve rubbed off on you the amount of times your father said it to you Here’s a poem just for you for Valentines Day, Mister Sebastian Roses are red Violets are blue, very original start by the way Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses are wilted The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head Perhaps you should of taken less time trying to insult me And come up with more of an original start to your poem For as you might of seen, a lot of people started their poem with Roses are red and violets are blue I have no idea why you are all obsessed with this Fuck you too Roses are red Lemons are sour Sebastian, please let me open my legs and give me an hour Followed by droplets of water and aubergines Fantastic… Poems don’t necessarily have to rhyme If you didn’t know that, you have to give me a dime They don’t have to, but I’m still doing it Because honestly, I’m just full of bullshit Oh well that is fantastic dear, you’ll get on with the rest of the comments just fine (: My memes are ironic My depression is chronic Throw my arms behind me I’m faster than Sonic Roses are red My procrastination is unhealthy If I see one more nine year old reading lemons Please fucking shoot me I’m very glad that others share my viewpoint on this topic Sebastian, I apologize to say The more you age, the more lazy you get Your spelling skills decrease every day And grammar, you always forget Your roasting talent is forgotten overnight Just like your face is forgotten by daylight Your only fans are stupid otaku girls And if they’re not a girl, well, they’re gay men with curls Can you stop this nonsense so-called ‘roasting’? No, you can’t, just like you couldn’t stop your own young master from becoming a demon How did you feel when you couldn’t even succeed at becoming a demon? you’re failing So go work at a Maid Cafe it’s the only place that will hire you. Move on! When stupid people get roasted for free Roasted is something I have yet to be When I’m feeling in the blues I remember my name is Terry Crews I love popopopopopower I need to take a shshshshshshower Sebastian, you can only read this poem if you promise to forever smell like power Well Mister Terry Crews I promise you I will forever smell of power I watched an anime and if I may it was quite loco t’was Boku no Pico It’s also one of my favorites too I’d love to see you roast me, but I doubt you can ‘Cause your game is so weak, you pathetic old man. You have nothing better to do than correct people’s grammar That’s only because you have no chicks to hammar When you’re not doing that, you’re over on HentaiHaven ‘Cause you’re nothing more than a pervy raven You’ve got such a big ego and you think you’re tough shit But that’s only to hide the fact that you’ve got such a small dick I’d keep this going, but I’m sure you get the gist Ya lovable demonic bitch Well done, that was not a bad rap at all It’s a shame it’s nowhere near as fire as the stuff I spit my dear Harry was in denial Ruby was in a trial Ashton played on a tile And Sebastian is a pedophile God made coke God made pepsi God made me, oh so sexy God made rivers God made lakes God made Sebastian Well we all make mistakes Wow, I am just offended right now Like what? Are you implying that I am a mistake? You want to insult me, well I can insult you just as much Harry was in denial Ruby was in a trial What kind of pathetic way is that to start a poem? Who-who you trying to appeal to with that? Nobody D:

100 thoughts on “POEM EDITION – SEBASTIAN ROASTS COMMENTS

  1. Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    Alois is a cunt
    And Claude is too

  2. This was made in february, but im in november, can i hurry, so i could end in slender.

    Why is he roasting, comments are just fake, i don't know if he's boasting, it's just a pointy stake.

    Anime is an japanese otaku,
    When it tastes like a taco,
    But when they are here,
    It always taste like beer.

    That is my poem i hope you like it,
    Wether it is dumb you have to still click, if you read this you are a legend, but if not you are my peasant.

  3. Do you work at Starbucks? Because I like you a latte.

    (Is my grammar good? If not,well kill me now)

  4. 2:57 What, does someone force u to watch CDawgVA?? U know u can turn off auto play, right?

  5. Roses are red,
    Violets are blue,
    I miss M.C.R,
    And I know you do to.

    ( I know this is a poem and you asked for a pickup line but I’m only 10, and I would die if I ever dated. )

  6. You would love a kitten?
    Well, that only got your head bitten.
    But, do not fret as I use my claws.
    To just hold your hand, oh, I'm sorry..paws.

    Thank you.

  7. someone save me P.S Leave him and cat's alone I LOVE CATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  8. Roses are red,
    Violets are blue,
    I have five fingers,
    And the middle one's for you.

  9. Are you australian? Because you meet all of my koalafications.
    Are you mexican? Because you’re my juan and only!
    Roses are red, violets are blue, it would be a shame if I couldn’t date you!
    Charzards are red Squitals are blue if u were a Pokemon i would choose you!
    Is your name Ariel? Cause we Mermaid for each other!
    Wow your hotter than Ciel parents when they bured!
    P.S Im a nerd at pick up lines i hope u like the pick up lines

  10. I gotta pick-up line:

    Hey Sebastian… I'm a teletubbie.

  11. well, even though this was from a year ago, i kind of want to post one I've written recently.

    The beauty in our nightmares,

    is that they aren't real.

    but that never stopped my darkest of thoughts, the constant scares.

    Every day i would wake in the hell i called home, begging to feel.

    The smiles were so believeable at the time, the lies were told as if true.

    God himself spoke to me one day, and he warned me that even the light had been flawed.

    Despite the doubts that clouded my visions, my entirity, i believed in you.

    Lucifer himself spoke to me when day turned to night, and showed me the horror behind your facade.

    I looked upon the impossible to guide me.

    I begged, i pleaded to the likes of man with a smile on my face.

    Hopeless and losing my heart, i spread my wings in hopes heaven would finally find me.

    "This world isn't as beautiful as we see it to be, you gaze upon the stars and you see a light so luminous and full of mystery, but when you realize just how far out of reach that said light is, how far we would have to go just to see a LITTLE bit more of it, we begin to wonder if we will ever go beyond the darkness which holds only death in its hand."

    So when we look inside ourselves, we realize those nightmares are entities of what we are and our deepest, darkest of fears..

    We realize that we will eventually lose our colors, fading away slowly into time until what we once were disappears.

  12. Claude is a theif
    Claude stole your young master
    Sebastian is a keeper
    Claude got killed and won ciel back
    But ciel is a demon
    So you have lost your meal
    But your contract still remains
    So what shall be shall be
    Now I wish season two was better

  13. Sebastian
    Ciel
    Just like fire and ice
    A blue bird and a raven
    Blood and water
    Wine and vodka
    Monster and valium
    Both opposites working together in equilibria

  14. Hi Sebastian I am a fan and I just wanted to say roses are red and violets are blue I just want to say i love you ^^ I hope you like it

  15. Featured within your roasting is something I have yet to be,
    Yet, no matter how hard I endeavor, I simply cannot quite see-
    An obsession with Tellietubbies on dear Sebastians mind-
    For you see, I believed it was kittens, or others like their kind.
    Ceil and Sebastian were simply not meant to be shipped ; as Grell and Sebastian are more perfectly fit.
    Like fire and earth, they complete one another – as "deadly efficient", and "one hell of a butler"
    Forever your fan,
    WOLFJADE

  16. what's the name of the song at the end of your video ??? and you should make an anime with your profile pitcher because I like your character, he looks so handsome and cool (not as cool as Sebastian tho )

  17. Sebastian, the only dark rose.
    Always standing with a foreboding pose.
    What lies behind that calm smile, nobody knows.
    Are you human or a shell,
    I could analyse but I couldn't tell.

    I hope you liked my poem.😈😀

  18. Is this the voice of kyoya from ouron highschool host club? They kind of sound the same

  19. roses are red
    voilets are blue
    ciel's parents are dead
    what does that say to you

  20. I don’t know why you roast people Sebby but I swear to you I will roast you! 😉

  21. I thought you’d be be honored to know, my mom told told me she could sleep to your voice. 😶😂

  22. god all the other comments were posted over a year ago, so I supposed that there is no real reason to send a pick up line, but whatever. It's Naruto related because of the shinobi.

    Are you a Shinobi? Because when it comes to the art of making my heart race, your skills are as sharp as a ninja's.

  23. I'm not any good when it comes to poems for you see I don't make many I don't know where to go from here sorry for the waist in your time my dear

  24. A dog just jumped in the fire so I said “hot dog.” But here I am sinking in a bog.. I said save me. Was it Dave who pushed me in? The dog is dead and so is Fred. The dog burned in the fire and I am beginning to tire.

  25. Time is a beautiful thing.
    We try to contain and and perceive it.
    We pretend to know what it is.
    Time knows that.
    It doesn’t mind.
    It continues being time.
    Time is what it is.
    And it never ends.
    Time is a beautiful thing.

    -Me

  26. Roses are red,
    Violet's are blue,
    Sebastian is a man whore and so are you

  27. I probabilly made mistakes
    as a person I promise
    I am not bad
    but,when Alois
    dided I wasn't even sad

    Roses are red
    Here's something new
    Violets are violet
    and not fucking blue
    I stole this poem and so did you

    why be sad?
    why be mad?
    when you can be glad
    when you can be glad that you live
    when you can be happy that you
    have commited no sin
    live life to the fullest
    with no regrets
    and not looking back at the past

  28. Ok I know I'm late as fuck but here's my pickup line: Out of all the curves on your body, your smile is my favorite!

  29. I WAS THE ONE WHO WRITE THE ROSES ARE RED,
    LEMONS ARE SOUR,
    PLEASE LET ME OPEN MY LEGS AND GIVE ME AN HOUR LIKE TWO YEARS AGO. I LOOK BACK AT THIS AND IM PROUD

  30. Roses are red
    Ciel is Bae
    When I look at your face
    I made grammar mistakes

  31. Don't know if this is a good poem. It had nothing to do with black butler. Just life and death.
    Rise And Fall
    People blossom and crawl
    But even those people will eventually fall
    Children rise like new day
    Up and waiting to play
    And with a crash they will get older
    Growing,grinning and greater than ever Tears scream as people cry in the night there lost loved ones so the light though you cannot see their smile they will be with you for a while and as you join them in the sky now both of you can fly

    ( this is an original I wrote for school.)

  32. "Roses are red, BEGONE YOU THOT, your mom is gay, mine is not." -Willaim Shakesphere

  33. Okay…. Okay…. I'm giving you this one..

    Ciel: Do you like… Ghosts? And uh, bees? Cause I can be your Phantomhive!

    Crowd: ……

    Ciel: No..? Nobody?.. Ah, okay…. ;-;

  34. Why can't "common sense" be a little more common in this sh*tty world?? Oh, it's me again, sorry for the "language," ( I just laughed, I know, disappointing. Get it?? ) but I just wanted ask, will all of you people drooling over Sebastian ( And most likely yaoi fanfiction.) please kindly shut your faces and keep it to yourselves?? I'm not saying I'm perfect or anything, but I've been unable to comment up until this very day… cE: – It's a cat sticking out its tongue for goodness sake…

  35. I've got to correct something Ai Mikaze, you should not have said "Mister Sebastian". Reason being is that Sebastian is his first name. So if you'd like to address him without using his last name or calling him "Mister Michealis". Might I suggest calling him Sir?
    Wouldn't you say Sebastian?

  36. Roses are red,
    violets are blue,
    everyone is doing this,
    and I am too.

    (I know I'm late but ehhhhh)

  37. You told me to make a poem just so you can roast the life out of me but guess what you can't because I am dead inside I have no soul and my heart runs red with the blood of my enemies it doesn't ride that's why I'm not making a poem my poem is going to be in the next comment so read that but I dare you to try to roast me cuz I ain't got no soul

  38. Roses are red violets are blue be my valentine. Bruises are blue blood is red don't say no or you'll end up with them too I hope you like my poem

  39. Sebastian: I'm one HELL of a butler.
    Me: YES YOU ARE !
    Sebastian you rock !! Best demon ever ! Ciel is cute , but you're as hot as the fire in hell

  40. here's one that will make Sebastian happy.
    Roses are red vilotes arnt blue they are simply purple but it varies in hue

  41. 9.9k comments,
    Yeah Sebby you're a bit screwed 😄

    Edit: I put you instead of yeah and put your instead of you're lol

  42. Old vid i know but it was anoying me he is a demon so god didn't make him!

  43. You know your full of shit
    If you say season two was lit. I suspect sabatian likes Teletubbies, sciell, cats,dogs, and grell more than a bit.

  44. Give me a nick name
    Mine.

    Don't worry…Cause the farthest we are…is a heartbeat away…

    Did the sun come out or did you just smile at me?

    Your hand looks heavy,lemme hold it for ya

    So what's on the menu?
    ME-N-U

    Can I tie your shoes? I don't want you falling for…somebody else

    Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?

    I was feeling a little off today,but…you definitely turned me on!

    Oh he's leaving…HEY! Aren't you forgeting something?
    What?
    ME!

    Sorry if my grammar killed you ^̮^

  45. so is taylor ann marie saying that god made a mistake by making him sexy?

  46. "ten thousand or whatever the fuck there was" great estimation, Sebastian.

  47. Well done Bassi! Perhaps I too can produce some poetry for you!

  48. I have on for u!

    Erm….salsa is red,tacos are delicious,
    I use paper plates,because I hate washing the dishes

    Sorry if I spelled something wrong

  49. IF GOD MADE Sebastian HE WOULD BE AN ANGEL SO BOYYYYYYYY LIKE WHAT THE LITRAL HEK

  50. I have never heard someone seriously say 'aubergine' my life is complete. Merci, Sebastian.

  51. just have a meme for you…
    Sebastian:I am one hell of a-
    Ciel: -Bitch

  52. Sebastian roasts
    It tastes like toast
    I have cringeworthy joke
    That Sebastian know is a Hoax

  53. Sebastian roasts
    It tastes like toast
    I have cringeworthy joke
    That Sebastian know is a Hoax
    ————————-——————————————
    Sorry Sebastian 😓

  54. I sorry to say…

    FUCK ALL THE CIELXSEBASTIAN SHIPS BECAUSE ….

    Sebastian belongs to me..

  55. YOI IM NOT AN OTAKU GIRL, YOU BETTER COME OVER HERE AND FIGHT ME

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