“PRESIDENTIAL POETRY SLAM” — A Bad Lip Reading of the Second Presidential Debate

*** You can turn these captions off and on using the CC button below We return now to the Presidential Poetry Slam and Q&A This is “Bird’s Eye” There was always parts of birds in our ice cream Such as a little bird’s eye Vividly, I ate a bird’s eye Stephanie, where’s the bird’s eye? Wait, here’s a little wing Help me, it’s crunchy, why’s that? Don’t wanna touch it Eww, look a beak… guess everything’s here. I call this “Brown Bikini” We lived our white lie in a red cage that’s now gone Anger… rust… And the summer ice I couldn’t melt in a brown bikini It’s time to take a question from one of the members of our audience Yes, Lady Clinton… what does your friend know about the poop in a basket left behind for the – Ma’am, this question is over. Oh, okay, thank you! Mr. Trump, your next poem This is “Mike the Merry Cricket” Mike just loved to sing And when he was little, the bees and the toucan would always stop by Until one horrible day there’s cricket meat in the gravy Yes, there was And what it was, was Mike The Merry Cricket. We stay too fast for the wicked cadavers The ones who are dead and yet live. Look, there’s a face of a skeleton in the sand where a person once died Just because zombies I think we have a question now from this man Yes, Mr. Trump Why is it that, in front of all the people, you’re kind of nasty? Excuse me, I don’t meed the people I want me, personally Forget all the people! See, that’s nasty Don’t talk Oooh, sorry about Little Miss Sunshine, sir He’s afraid of brownness, can’t forget about that I’m sorry sir I shouldn’t have said “brownness” I’m not proud of that Can I get you a coffee or a nice doughnut? It’s just too much, it’s lovely to meet you, and Just… wanna… I… I love you, buddy Mr Trump has a poem next It was not good in my garden that year It was not good in my garden I am not brave I am a merchant My trade was bad for me, but For my family, and for my fearful son Drake, It sure LOOKED like bravery But it was not good in my garden that year It was not good in my garden Your response Secretary Clinton All right, all right, okay kids This is newish It’s called “Stealthily Bobby” and it goes like this Stealthily, Bobby licked the mirror in high school The janitor went “hi ho! oui, oui!” “Come and dance for us” “On this sea of hope you’re sure to float, like a boat” “Come home and smell our candle scent, oui oui” “Come and dance for us” “You can meet Lou. He’s a great dude and a surfer.” Okay, let’s have another question from the audience Let’s see, my card says- Oh wait, this is empty! I’m a butthead, so I’m just gonna wing it My Becky is so blonde, she forgot to make her bed once She’s kinda… My Becky is so blonde, she first tried to make out with a bird That doesn’t- My Becky is so blonde, she froze our tomato plant once Hey, stop talking soon or the witch will come get you… Oh dang No, don’t worry, look I don’t want any champagne I don’t like juice that’s aged Instead, I want a big chocolate milk And I think eventually, the world will see that chocolate milk is the chocolatiest thing out on the planet that you can drink Oh my gosh, that’s a bunch of flies! It’s like so many It’s freaking me out Does she not know they’re there? I just… I don’t know Ummm, let me – Martha, don’t ruin this… ok? Where are the women? The shepherd abandons the sheep And he puts away his wife’s old shoe And he drives his big gold car Marci was a problem Like Twila, Debbie, and Lola And before he can love you, you have to SHUT THE LIP

100 thoughts on ““PRESIDENTIAL POETRY SLAM” — A Bad Lip Reading of the Second Presidential Debate

  1. That part between 2:00–2:02 — whoever made those noises (the oooh-chuckle and the sheep laughter sound) NAILED Clinton 😂

  2. I think I finally understand how he won…she got cocky! We don't want her to be way towards other world leaders…& him being sullen, that's all that mattered…the body language.

  3. Who ever does the voices (accept for the female ones) just sounds to young…like a kid. Trump and others need dudes with deeper more mature manly voices.

  4. Why do these lemmings keep typing the garden poem in the comments?
    Do they not read or do they just think we don’t listen? Numbnuts.

  5. Wow, you (BLR) are obviously a Democrat sheep. Turn CNN off & WAKE UP.

  6. Can't tell the difference between this and his actual speaches lol

  7. They all sound like they were written with predictive text

  8. Hi, I'm flies on my face Johnson, I have flies on my face, also I can't feel anything

  9. I have Bushes in the garden yes Bushes with a capital B. And i love bush in the garden.

  10. “You can meet Lou he’s a Great Deal and a surfer”

    These never get old.

  11. Two yrs later hes cut taxes unemployment and so much more, massively benefiting America. And Libtard fuxkwad democnts still hate him. Odd.

  12. Brown bikini is actual description of Hillary naked. The sight of it killed all those birds that ny had to put in soup. The little bodies ruined a Lot of gardens. Again Hillary danced,more bodies, zombies. More flies…so many flies. Its a prob for hill dog. The dying stench draws flies. So many flies.still today, she can't master stairs,flies,or fill seats for a theater😜

  13. There were a lot of creative liberties in this with Trumps vocabulary

  14. Trump: You stop talking or the witch will come get ya.
    Clinton: *smiles deviously*

  15. "I'm sorry sir, I shouldn't have called you brown. Can I get you a coffee or something? It's just too much"

  16. Stealthily Bobby would make a nice rap

  17. "Stealthy Bobby" and "The Shepherd (Is me)" would've slayed down at the book club.

  18. So today the rhythm of "stealthily Bobby" popped in my head, except the words I thought it was was "suddenly Beverly," and i couldn't figure out what comedian or movie had a poem called "suddenly Beverly" until it got me that it was from this, lol! This is such a great video, even a few years later

  19. Can you do one with all the 2020 Democratic Primary Presidential Candidate debate?

  20. Did the flies thing really happen?? I mean, I'm guessing there was just 1, right?

  21. This is highly amusing I got me to find the right and sit-ups the greatest rivalry in the world motherfukers stand up and bow bow wow holy cow the greatest

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